Hello,wellcome to Faith Chapel 00:00:30.71\00:00:32.94 My name is BJ Boles 00:00:32.97\00:00:35.38 Today we're gonna be talking a little bit about relationships 00:00:35.46\00:00:38.66 Our telephone calls aren't the same,are they? 00:00:40.10\00:00:42.76 Sometimes we receive calls 00:00:43.29\00:00:44.72 and we carelessly answer the phone 00:00:44.76\00:00:46.97 thinking this is a regular call, 00:00:47.00\00:00:47.97 but sometimes they are quite different 00:00:47.98\00:00:49.61 I remember receiving a call from my mother 00:00:49.64\00:00:52.87 I was very,very busy 00:00:52.90\00:00:54.75 I was pastoring a church 00:00:54.78\00:00:56.56 and it seemed there were so many things going on 00:00:56.60\00:00:58.97 and I got a call 00:00:59.00\00:01:00.79 and she said that my papa Oscar had passed away 00:01:00.83\00:01:06.17 All of a sudden, 00:01:06.20\00:01:07.21 all those busy meetings and schedules didn't matter 00:01:07.25\00:01:09.92 papa Oscar was a very special person to me 00:01:09.95\00:01:13.24 he was really the only grand dad I really knew 00:01:13.27\00:01:16.53 coming up as a boy 00:01:16.56\00:01:17.53 as far as spending time with him and so forth 00:01:17.54\00:01:20.27 so all those busy meetings and all those commitees and so forth 00:01:20.31\00:01:24.73 were cancelled and put on hold 00:01:24.76\00:01:27.18 and I headed down to [?] beach 00:01:27.21\00:01:29.56 Florida, for the funeral of my papa Oscar 00:01:29.60\00:01:33.03 [?] beach has a lot of great memories for me 00:01:33.07\00:01:36.47 my dad's family is there 00:01:36.50\00:01:37.75 and I remember as a young boy going down and 00:01:37.79\00:01:40.34 spending time with papa Oscar and grannie Mart[?] 00:01:40.38\00:01:43.45 all are good memories 00:01:43.48\00:01:45.82 there were always huge gatherings of family there 00:01:45.86\00:01:48.94 and a lot food;we used to play football outside 00:01:48.97\00:01:51.87 and I remember that no matter how many people came 00:01:51.91\00:01:54.78 there was always space at the table 00:01:54.81\00:01:56.64 in fact, sometimes they put the table outside 00:01:56.68\00:01:58.89 so that everyone could have space 00:01:58.92\00:02:00.66 my grannie Martha, 00:02:00.69\00:02:02.05 well she always made a separate dish of vegetables for us 00:02:02.09\00:02:05.65 since we were vegetarians 00:02:05.68\00:02:07.87 my papa Oscar, I remember 00:02:07.90\00:02:10.38 he had this orange lawnmower 00:02:10.41\00:02:12.82 riding lawnmower,and we used to call this tractor 00:02:12.86\00:02:15.36 and as a little boy I used to get so excited 00:02:15.39\00:02:17.82 because I was going to ride papa Oscar's tractor 00:02:17.85\00:02:20.25 and one of my prized photographs as a child 00:02:20.28\00:02:22.93 was me sitting on that riding lawnmower 00:02:22.97\00:02:25.59 with my papa Oscar 00:02:25.62\00:02:26.59 whoúd go round, and round, and round, and round his house 00:02:26.60\00:02:30.34 and he never looked tired of that 00:02:30.37\00:02:31.97 papa Oscar taught me a little bit about fishing 00:02:32.01\00:02:34.21 papa Oscar didn't know much 00:02:34.24\00:02:36.18 about the health message 00:02:36.22\00:02:37.90 unfortunately and he had an expression:if you can bite, it 00:02:37.94\00:02:40.11 can be bitten and he ate all 00:02:40.14\00:02:41.99 kind of stuff I know my papa Oscar was a special person and 00:02:42.03\00:02:46.49 he taught me so many things 00:02:46.52\00:02:47.82 going down to that funeral I began to do a lot of thinking 00:02:47.86\00:02:51.98 you know,funerals do that, don't they? 00:02:52.01\00:02:55.81 they put you to a pensive state 00:02:55.84\00:02:57.22 they put you to a time of reflection 00:02:57.26\00:02:59.44 of contemplation,of analysis 00:02:59.47\00:03:01.86 of thinking about various aspects of your life and 00:03:01.90\00:03:04.88 maybe your interaction with the person who passed away 00:03:04.91\00:03:07.86 and I also went into a pensive time and 00:03:07.89\00:03:10.29 I began asking questions 00:03:10.32\00:03:12.34 as I began observing the funeral 00:03:12.38\00:03:14.63 and the memorial service 00:03:14.66\00:03:16.46 watching my family interact with one another 00:03:16.50\00:03:19.41 I began to ask questions 00:03:19.44\00:03:21.12 because I remembered previous funerals 00:03:21.16\00:03:23.57 I had attended before as well 00:03:23.60\00:03:24.94 and these questions really probed my mind 00:03:24.98\00:03:27.62 and questions like: 00:03:27.65\00:03:30.17 Why do we wait till funerals to bury the hatchet? 00:03:30.21\00:03:34.93 There were some people there that were very upset, because 00:03:34.97\00:03:38.90 they had let some grievance 00:03:38.93\00:03:40.46 some disturbance with papa Oscar fester all the years 00:03:40.50\00:03:44.77 and never reconciled 00:03:44.80\00:03:47.09 and there they were,at that funeral 00:03:47.13\00:03:50.24 and there was no opportunity to reconcile now 00:03:50.28\00:03:53.10 we wait so long until it's too late 00:03:53.13\00:03:57.02 another question is why do we wait funerals to have reunions 00:03:57.06\00:04:02.08 it was an incredible gathering of my family 00:04:02.11\00:04:04.81 I haven't seen as many family members in one place before 00:04:04.85\00:04:07.84 all kind of cousins, 00:04:07.87\00:04:09.55 cousins I haven't seen for years and years and years were there 00:04:09.59\00:04:13.29 an incredible amount of people 00:04:13.32\00:04:15.59 I remember 00:04:15.62\00:04:17.10 "Little house on the prairie" episode so long ago 00:04:17.14\00:04:20.26 this little woman moves out to the prairie 00:04:20.29\00:04:23.19 she has two young people, children,adults 00:04:23.23\00:04:26.10 who live back in the east 00:04:26.13\00:04:27.73 and she writes and she writes and she writes 00:04:27.77\00:04:30.12 and she wants them to come and visit and 00:04:30.16\00:04:32.44 they are too busy, they are too busy, they are too busy 00:04:32.48\00:04:34.77 so she gets an idea 00:04:34.80\00:04:35.77 I'm gonna plan my own funeral, so 00:04:35.78\00:04:38.13 they will come and visit me, and she does that 00:04:38.17\00:04:41.27 and, as she thought they cancelled everything 00:04:41.31\00:04:44.34 and come out to the prairie to attend their motherús funeral 00:04:44.38\00:04:47.67 to their surprise 00:04:47.70\00:04:49.15 she attended her own funeral 00:04:49.19\00:04:51.75 we donút want to stage our own funeral 00:04:51.79\00:04:54.26 why do we wait to get together with family members 00:04:54.30\00:04:56.78 until such a time as that? 00:04:56.81\00:04:58.35 why do we wait till funerals to act like a family? 00:04:58.39\00:05:02.87 holding hands, embracing, spending time together 00:05:02.91\00:05:07.36 listening, sharing 00:05:07.39\00:05:09.68 why do we wait till funeral to ask forgiveness 00:05:09.72\00:05:13.31 from people who canút give forgiveness 00:05:13.34\00:05:16.68 who do we wait till funerals to appreciate people 00:05:16.72\00:05:20.27 who canút hear the appreciation 00:05:20.30\00:05:22.24 why do we wait till funerals to send flowers 00:05:22.28\00:05:24.45 to people who canút smell them 00:05:24.48\00:05:26.57 why do we wait till funerals to ponder what might have been 00:05:26.61\00:05:32.23 I remember I just arrived in a little church district 00:05:32.26\00:05:37.35 as their pastor 00:05:37.38\00:05:38.62 it was the very week I arrived and my home was full of boxes 00:05:38.66\00:05:42.62 and there were so many things going on 00:05:42.65\00:05:44.32 it was just kind of chaotic that first week 00:05:44.36\00:05:46.65 and I remember receiving a precious call 00:05:46.69\00:05:48.91 from Kitty Cromley[?], a dear friend, a dear lady, 00:05:48.95\00:05:52.24 and she wanted to wellcome the new pastor 00:05:52.27\00:05:55.49 you know, I am so glad the Lord kind of thumped me on the head 00:05:55.53\00:05:59.26 and I didnút say what I was going to say 00:05:59.29\00:06:01.01 I was going to say, it would have been understood 00:06:01.05\00:06:03.85 Listen, Iúm so busy, just getting here this week 00:06:03.89\00:06:06.62 can I set up a time to visit with you and your husband 00:06:06.66\00:06:09.60 next week? 00:06:09.63\00:06:11.04 but the Lord impressed me 00:06:11.08\00:06:13.16 to go visit her and her husband Earl Cromley[?] 00:06:13.20\00:06:16.19 so, I was going out there kind of pompously 00:06:16.23\00:06:19.15 I was going to bless them as the pastor, and pray with them 00:06:19.19\00:06:22.59 make them feel better 00:06:22.62\00:06:23.86 and it turned out to be totally opposite 00:06:23.90\00:06:26.87 when I arrived they just warmed me up 00:06:26.91\00:06:29.85 and wellcomed me in 00:06:29.88\00:06:30.85 there was a tremendous sharing time 00:06:30.86\00:06:32.90 and they encouraged my heart 00:06:32.93\00:06:35.20 well,Cromley,what a joy for man fun to be with 00:06:35.24\00:06:38.42 I'm so glad I got to spend time with them 00:06:38.45\00:06:41.02 at the end he reached out and 00:06:41.05\00:06:43.82 said: we just wanna have a 00:06:43.85\00:06:46.59 prayer for you as you begin your 00:06:46.89\00:06:47.86 ministry they blessed me 00:06:47.87\00:06:48.84 one week later Earl Cromley went into hospital 00:06:48.85\00:06:52.31 for a simple operation 00:06:52.34\00:06:54.23 and did not come out 00:06:54.26\00:06:56.08 he died in a simple operation 00:06:56.12\00:06:58.66 taken by surprise 00:06:58.69\00:07:00.36 ten days after my little visit with the Cromleys 00:07:00.40\00:07:03.77 I found myself holding the funeral for Earl Cromley 00:07:03.80\00:07:07.14 and I'm so glad that I was able to say: 00:07:07.17\00:07:10.40 I knew Earl Cromley 00:07:10.43\00:07:12.90 and I'm so glad I didn't have to say: 00:07:12.94\00:07:15.89 you know,I was scheduled to visit Earl Cromley 00:07:15.93\00:07:18.81 next weeek 00:07:18.84\00:07:20.09 I don't [?] to funerals sometimes to 00:07:20.13\00:07:22.76 see what might have been 00:07:22.79\00:07:24.62 why wait to a funeral sometimes to 00:07:24.66\00:07:26.45 regret 00:07:26.48\00:07:27.88 friendships undevelopped 00:07:27.92\00:07:29.82 the saddest thing that I ever had to do 00:07:29.86\00:07:32.90 the saddest thing that I ever had to do 00:07:32.94\00:07:35.57 was attend a funeral that no one came to 00:07:35.60\00:07:38.16 I had just arrived at another church district 00:07:38.20\00:07:41.78 at the beginning of a ministry there 00:07:41.81\00:07:43.42 an I got a call from the funeral home that 00:07:43.46\00:07:45.64 one nof the members had passed away and 00:07:45.67\00:07:47.78 I began calling aronund and no one seemed to know this person 00:07:47.82\00:07:50.54 it was a large church,but no one seemed to connect, 00:07:50.57\00:07:52.72 no one seemed to know 00:07:52.75\00:07:53.82 and so I went with a few friends 00:07:53.86\00:07:55.24 to hold the funeral 00:07:55.27\00:07:56.63 and no one came 00:07:56.66\00:07:57.99 wow! 00:07:58.02\00:07:59.78 what must that have said about that precious person 00:07:59.82\00:08:03.00 how lonely they must have been, 00:08:03.03\00:08:05.01 you see,sometimes we can just assume 00:08:05.05\00:08:07.09 that the person seating next to us is someone else's friend 00:08:07.13\00:08:10.28 someone else's daughter, 00:08:10.31\00:08:11.45 someone else is spending time with them 00:08:11.49\00:08:13.33 someone else has a neighbour that's helping them 00:08:13.37\00:08:15.87 and often it's not the case at all 00:08:15.90\00:08:18.98 the Lord may actually be calling us 00:08:19.01\00:08:22.11 to answer the prayers of someone else 00:08:22.15\00:08:24.71 someone may be praying for a friend 00:08:24.74\00:08:27.10 someone may be praying for interaction, 00:08:27.13\00:08:29.42 someone may be praying that someone reaches out to them 00:08:29.46\00:08:32.75 and we may be the answer 00:08:32.78\00:08:34.79 to someone else's prayer 00:08:34.82\00:08:36.76 why do we wait till funerals to [?] overtize? 00:08:36.80\00:08:41.15 you know,as busy as I was 00:08:41.18\00:08:42.98 as hectic as the schedule was 00:08:43.02\00:08:44.75 when I received the phone call from my mum 00:08:44.79\00:08:47.09 nothing was more important 00:08:47.12\00:08:48.74 than going and attending my granfather's funeral 00:08:48.78\00:08:52.46 I learnt a lesson about priority 00:08:52.49\00:08:55.14 a young girl,we call her name Joane 00:08:55.18\00:08:57.80 a precious girl,young lady 00:08:57.83\00:08:59.79 a beautiful daughter, 00:08:59.82\00:09:00.79 went in for a simple day out pacient surgery 00:09:00.80\00:09:03.47 and came home,started feeling ill 00:09:03.50\00:09:05.92 really ill,couldn't get 00:09:05.95\00:09:07.08 at all to the doctor, 00:09:07.12\00:09:08.18 they rushed her back to the hospital 00:09:08.22\00:09:09.63 that night,she 00:09:09.66\00:09:10.80 was in shock 00:09:10.83\00:09:11.90 she ends up going into a coma 00:09:11.94\00:09:13.58 for a whole month 00:09:13.61\00:09:15.63 due to the complications, 00:09:15.67\00:09:19.56 she loses her eye-sight during this time 00:09:19.60\00:09:21.07 she had been engaged,but 00:09:21.10\00:09:22.07 but her fiancee decided he did not wanna be 00:09:22.08\00:09:23.16 married to a blind woman, and 00:09:23.19\00:09:25.16 cancelled the engagement 00:09:25.19\00:09:26.95 certainly,trauma entered her life 00:09:26.99\00:09:28.66 crisis like they had never seen 00:09:28.70\00:09:30.30 and what I learnt about priority is 00:09:30.34\00:09:32.44 Joane's mother 00:09:32.47\00:09:35.07 was by her side the whole time 00:09:35.11\00:09:37.80 nothiong was more important than 00:09:37.84\00:09:40.50 being with her daughter 00:09:40.53\00:09:41.95 at those special times,at those special moments 00:09:41.99\00:09:46.72 why does it take a crisis 00:09:46.75\00:09:49.67 for us realize that 00:09:49.70\00:09:51.36 family is important 00:09:51.40\00:09:52.99 why does it take a crisis 00:09:53.03\00:09:54.63 to realize that you need to slow down 00:09:54.67\00:09:58.02 we seem to be always in a hurry 00:09:58.05\00:10:01.27 we seem to always be rushing to get things done 00:10:01.31\00:10:03.14 and sometimes we rush and rush so much 00:10:03.17\00:10:06.04 that we even forget why we are rushing 00:10:06.08\00:10:08.88 Have you ever caught yourself rushing down the Inner State[?] 00:10:08.92\00:10:11.83 and you realize there was no hurry 00:10:11.86\00:10:13.33 there was no need to rush,but 00:10:13.36\00:10:14.82 we get so caught up 00:10:14.85\00:10:16.01 you know,technology hasn't helped our life,has it? 00:10:16.05\00:10:19.60 we think that technology will help,but 00:10:19.63\00:10:22.08 we think that technology will slow things down 00:10:22.11\00:10:25.23 but really PDAs and cell phones and pagers 00:10:25.27\00:10:28.34 and blackberries and all this kind of things really have 00:10:28.38\00:10:31.32 done as complicate our lives 00:10:31.35\00:10:33.73 time hasn't extended itself 00:10:33.76\00:10:36.07 there are still 24 hours in a day 00:10:36.11\00:10:39.26 but we try to create 48 into 24 00:10:39.29\00:10:42.37 we try to micro-manage every second 00:10:42.41\00:10:45.20 until we are micro-managed to death 00:10:45.23\00:10:47.95 and we are so busy that we have no time to spend with people 00:10:47.99\00:10:52.43 you see, Satan has a great lie 00:10:52.46\00:10:54.80 Satan's lie is that we need this and we need that 00:10:54.84\00:10:58.79 we need to get this thing and get that thing 00:10:58.82\00:11:01.66 we need power,we need prestige, we need 00:11:01.69\00:11:04.10 monetary gain, and so we 00:11:04.13\00:11:05.75 spend our life in a vicious cycle getting 00:11:05.79\00:11:08.08 getting,getting 00:11:08.11\00:11:09.71 we ignore people as we learn that vicious cycle 00:11:09.75\00:11:13.32 and we are wrapped up in that cycle 00:11:13.35\00:11:15.82 he knows that we have no time for God 00:11:15.85\00:11:18.29 we have no time for family 00:11:18.32\00:11:20.47 and we are very self-absorbed 00:11:20.51\00:11:22.59 we take life for granted, don't we? 00:11:22.63\00:11:25.34 we assume that tomorrow will be here for us 00:11:25.38\00:11:27.90 we assume that tomorrow life will be the same as it was today 00:11:27.94\00:11:31.84 we forget that every breadth is a gift from God 00:11:31.87\00:11:35.93 well,one thing that I want us to understand today 00:11:35.96\00:11:39.99 is the most important thing in 00:11:40.02\00:11:42.71 life the most important thing: 00:11:42.74\00:11:44.86 our relationships 00:11:44.89\00:11:46.99 absolutely everything else will fade 00:11:47.03\00:11:49.82 number one is our relationship with God 00:11:49.85\00:11:52.57 and number two is our relationships with others 00:11:52.61\00:11:55.20 those are the significant things 00:11:55.23\00:11:58.35 everything else pales in comparison 00:11:58.39\00:12:01.44 the old song" Cats in the criddle" tells a story 00:12:01.48\00:12:05.17 a story of a young boy wanting to spend time with his dad 00:12:05.21\00:12:09.86 but dad's too busy 00:12:09.89\00:12:11.48 perhaps even "providing" for his family 00:12:11.52\00:12:13.83 to spend time with the boy 00:12:13.86\00:12:15.39 he says:dad,spend some time with me 00:12:15.43\00:12:17.09 he says:we'll get together soon,son 00:12:17.12\00:12:18.75 we'll get together soon 00:12:18.78\00:12:19.95 this story twists at the end and 00:12:19.99\00:12:22.74 the father now has ended his career and now has time 00:12:22.78\00:12:25.82 but the son is now caught up in that cycle 00:12:25.85\00:12:29.24 and the dad wants to spend time with his boy,but now 00:12:29.28\00:12:32.11 the boy says:sorry,dad, 00:12:32.14\00:12:33.94 I'm too busy 00:12:33.97\00:12:35.14 we'll get together soon 00:12:35.18\00:12:36.86 when we look at the cycle of life it's quite interesting 00:12:36.90\00:12:41.24 when we compare where we begin with where we end 00:12:41.27\00:12:44.77 we come into this world with nothing 00:12:44.80\00:12:47.78 and people taking care of us 00:12:47.81\00:12:49.72 somewhere in between we aquire all kind of stuff 00:12:49.76\00:12:53.77 but as we get to the latter years often we downsize 00:12:53.81\00:12:57.49 we move into smaller homes, get rid of all the stuff 00:12:57.52\00:13:01.17 we've acquired 00:13:01.20\00:13:02.32 and in fact many times we end life 00:13:02.36\00:13:05.85 with nothing 00:13:05.88\00:13:07.33 and someone taking care of us 00:13:07.37\00:13:09.49 here the question will remain: 00:13:09.52\00:13:11.57 what do we do in the in between time 00:13:11.61\00:13:15.63 what do we do with relationships during those times 00:13:15.67\00:13:17.98 I mean,we are so busy doing things and at 00:13:18.01\00:13:19.47 the end of our lives we'll be by ourselves enjoying them 00:13:19.51\00:13:24.52 well,why do we wait till 00:13:24.55\00:13:26.96 funerals to see the good in 00:13:26.99\00:13:29.03 people that's an amazing 00:13:29.07\00:13:31.04 question why can't we see the good in people right away 00:13:31.08\00:13:34.18 papa Oscar,the truth was, 00:13:34.21\00:13:39.06 was kind of an ordinary can tankrist[?] 00:13:39.10\00:13:41.61 he was kind of stubborn sometimes 00:13:41.64\00:13:43.98 and some people didn't like his abrasive kind of talking 00:13:44.02\00:13:47.58 but why didn't I see that, 00:13:47.61\00:13:49.54 why did I overlook that 00:13:49.58\00:13:51.44 why to me was that insignificant 00:13:51.48\00:13:54.33 I think it is important to realize why 00:13:54.37\00:13:57.19 because to me papa Oscar was my papa Oscar 00:13:57.22\00:13:59.49 and he was the greatest thing in the world 00:13:59.52\00:14:01.76 I ignored all that other stuff 00:14:01.79\00:14:03.69 and you know why I ignored it? 00:14:03.73\00:14:05.56 because I was seeing papa Oscar not with adult eyes 00:14:05.60\00:14:09.43 not with critical eyes,not with judgemental eyes, 00:14:09.47\00:14:13.27 not with comparative eyes, 00:14:13.30\00:14:14.87 I was looking at papa Oscar with child's eyes 00:14:14.91\00:14:19.71 the simple honesty of a child, 00:14:19.74\00:14:23.19 no bias,no prejudice, 00:14:23.22\00:14:25.79 no tendency to discriminate, 00:14:25.83\00:14:28.20 in fact just looking strait at the person for who they are 00:14:28.24\00:14:32.03 that's what children do, isn't it? 00:14:32.06\00:14:34.70 a little child sees another child 00:14:34.74\00:14:37.31 they don't come up and say: you know,how much do you make 00:14:37.35\00:14:40.27 where are you from? 00:14:40.30\00:14:41.50 they don't look what colour they are 00:14:41.54\00:14:42.51 they don't look at the car they are driving 00:14:42.52\00:14:44.60 they in fact see simply another person 00:14:44.63\00:14:47.65 to play with 00:14:47.68\00:14:49.06 somehow in the process of getting older 00:14:49.10\00:14:51.67 we learn how to discriminate very professionally,don't we? 00:14:51.71\00:14:55.45 the Bible talks about this type of insight 00:14:55.48\00:14:59.82 it talks about this type of perspective,the child's eyes 00:14:59.86\00:15:03.49 becoming as little children 00:15:03.52\00:15:05.41 if you go to the Bible 00:15:05.44\00:15:07.87 Matthew 18,verse 3 00:15:07.91\00:15:10.27 Jesus tells us to be as little children 00:15:10.31\00:15:13.82 wouldn't life be brighter if we had children's eyes 00:15:31.07\00:15:35.31 wouldn't the world be a better place 00:15:35.34\00:15:38.26 if we were gonna look with children's perspective 00:15:38.30\00:15:41.14 that innocent perspective, 00:15:41.17\00:15:42.86 that non-condemning perspective, 00:15:42.90\00:15:45.12 the less critical nature perspective 00:15:45.16\00:15:48.10 to have godly insight 00:15:48.13\00:15:49.93 you see,when God looks at us 00:15:49.97\00:15:52.53 there is a lot of bad that he can see 00:15:52.57\00:15:55.00 it's so easy to see the bad in people,isn't it? 00:15:55.04\00:15:57.85 that's really the lazy way out ,actually 00:15:57.88\00:15:59.62 but when God sees us 00:15:59.65\00:16:01.59 yes,he sees a sinner 00:16:01.62\00:16:03.49 when he looks at me,but he sees through the sin 00:16:03.53\00:16:07.11 and he sees the potential 00:16:07.14\00:16:09.04 of what I can be 00:16:09.07\00:16:10.88 once washed in His grace 00:16:10.92\00:16:12.75 and once given a new start 00:16:12.78\00:16:14.58 in a Christian walk 00:16:14.61\00:16:16.30 God sees potential 00:16:16.34\00:16:17.96 we also shall look around and understand 00:16:18.00\00:16:20.97 that every person 00:16:21.00\00:16:22.57 is a potential child of God 00:16:22.61\00:16:25.08 every person is a potential person to hear the Gospel 00:16:25.12\00:16:29.19 to have their life transformed 00:16:29.22\00:16:31.25 to have their life restored 00:16:31.29\00:16:33.29 and given a new start 00:16:33.32\00:16:34.97 in Jesus Christ 00:16:35.00\00:16:36.22 Jesus asked two things: 00:16:36.26\00:16:39.11 to love and to not judge 00:16:39.14\00:16:41.92 we need to have that godly insight 00:16:41.96\00:16:45.14 that child's perspective 00:16:45.17\00:16:47.50 all you need is love 00:16:47.54\00:16:49.80 that's what the Bible says 00:16:49.84\00:16:52.38 we go to John 13,verse34 and 35 00:16:52.42\00:17:00.56 what's very, very important is to understand 00:17:15.73\00:17:20.42 that Jesus wants to say:listen, if you love one another, 00:17:20.46\00:17:24.62 if you have love for one another that's 00:17:24.65\00:17:26.75 how they will know that you are my disciples 00:17:26.79\00:17:28.90 that's odd, isn't it? 00:17:28.93\00:17:31.33 it's not just a sign 00:17:31.36\00:17:33.69 out front to let people know that we are Christians 00:17:33.73\00:17:36.50 we don't wear badges or hats 00:17:36.53\00:17:38.68 but in fact Jesus says a very simple test: 00:17:38.72\00:17:41.61 if you love as I have loved, 00:17:41.64\00:17:43.68 love other people that same way 00:17:43.71\00:17:45.75 but how you treat each other 00:17:45.78\00:17:47.79 will distinguish you 00:17:47.82\00:17:50.06 as my people 00:17:50.09\00:17:51.06 and if you love one another 00:17:51.09\00:17:53.41 that will let people know 00:17:53.45\00:17:55.40 that you are my disciples 00:17:55.43\00:17:57.31 so,how do people know that we are Christians? 00:17:57.35\00:18:00.66 not by how many verses we memorize, 00:18:00.69\00:18:04.21 not by how nice we look,not by how our perfect attendance is, 00:18:04.25\00:18:08.21 not by where our membership is, 00:18:08.24\00:18:09.96 but in fact they will know that we know Jesus 00:18:10.00\00:18:13.69 if we love one another 00:18:13.72\00:18:15.51 they will know that we are connected to the Saviour 00:18:15.55\00:18:18.87 by how we treat other people 00:18:18.90\00:18:20.80 in fact,those relationships are very,very important 00:18:20.84\00:18:24.15 for they are a tell tale sign 00:18:24.18\00:18:26.65 if we are a child of God or not 00:18:26.68\00:18:29.04 how do we treat each other? 00:18:29.08\00:18:31.16 how do we care for each other? 00:18:31.20\00:18:33.25 how do we love each other? 00:18:33.28\00:18:34.94 wouldn't it be wonderful 00:18:34.97\00:18:36.60 to be known 00:18:36.63\00:18:38.88 for loving Jesus? 00:18:38.92\00:18:39.89 if someone came into your church 00:18:39.93\00:18:41.95 would they leave saying: 00:18:41.98\00:18:43.95 ah, it's a pretty church, it's a comfortable church 00:18:43.99\00:18:46.46 they had a good fellowship meal 00:18:46.49\00:18:47.84 or would they leave saying: 00:18:47.88\00:18:49.67 those people love Jesus 00:18:49.70\00:18:51.46 if we love Jesus, 00:18:51.49\00:18:52.92 if we uplift Jesus,people will want to come back 00:18:52.96\00:18:56.75 to see people who love Jesus 00:18:56.78\00:18:59.42 it's an amazing thing 00:18:59.45\00:19:01.79 a dream church,I'm sure that those churches exist 00:19:01.83\00:19:05.20 a church where people love without prejudice 00:19:05.23\00:19:08.32 without criticism 00:19:08.35\00:19:09.66 a church where there are no, strangers,because everyone 00:19:09.70\00:19:11.97 is treated as a family, 00:19:12.00\00:19:13.58 everyone is treated as a friend 00:19:13.62\00:19:15.39 they are warmly wellcomed 00:19:15.42\00:19:16.93 love covers a multitude of sins 00:19:16.97\00:19:21.13 God tells us to love 00:19:21.16\00:19:22.81 he tells us not to criticize 00:19:22.85\00:19:25.43 Jesus in fact tells us 00:19:25.46\00:19:27.49 a couple of verses explain 00:19:27.53\00:19:29.49 what a model church would be like 00:19:29.53\00:19:31.79 and certainly love is one of the central ingredients 00:19:31.83\00:19:35.24 that we look at 00:19:35.27\00:19:36.51 go to first Peter 4 and verse 8 00:19:36.55\00:19:54.66 Jesus says:above all things 00:19:54.69\00:19:57.35 we don't need a new programme 00:19:57.38\00:19:59.84 we don't need a new theology 00:19:59.88\00:20:02.27 it's not gonna be a new cathedral 00:20:02.31\00:20:04.39 that's gonna bring people to the church 00:20:04.43\00:20:06.31 it's not gonna be a new lesson plan 00:20:06.34\00:20:08.15 that's gonna bring people into a Bible study 00:20:08.19\00:20:10.63 the Bible says:above all things 00:20:10.66\00:20:13.49 if you have love 00:20:13.52\00:20:15.30 and it covers up a lot of errors if you have love 00:20:15.34\00:20:18.16 love is kind of the oil 00:20:18.19\00:20:20.86 that covers up all the mistakes 00:20:20.90\00:20:23.63 that we all make 00:20:23.66\00:20:25.55 number one priority 00:20:25.59\00:20:27.45 is love 00:20:27.48\00:20:28.45 another verse is found in the book of Romans 00:20:28.48\00:20:31.29 Romans chapter 12 and verse 10 00:20:31.32\00:20:34.31 that's awesome,isn't it? 00:20:46.15\00:20:47.49 not a selfish place, not a selfish church 00:20:47.53\00:20:50.31 it's a place where we honour one another 00:20:50.35\00:20:53.10 we respect one another 00:20:53.13\00:20:54.59 and "me" philosophy doesn't fit in with Christ philosophy 00:20:54.63\00:20:58.92 of what a church is 00:20:58.95\00:21:00.40 because it's about reflecting what he gave to us 00:21:00.44\00:21:04.11 we are to be of one mind 00:21:04.14\00:21:07.75 first Peter 3 and verse 8 00:21:07.79\00:21:11.37 compassionate,tender-hearted 00:21:27.96\00:21:31.22 courteous;that's awesome, isn't it? 00:21:31.26\00:21:34.74 that's what we wanna be about 00:21:34.77\00:21:37.48 that's what this is all about, that's what life is all about 00:21:37.52\00:21:41.78 I received another call 00:21:41.81\00:21:45.29 a call from my mother again 00:21:45.33\00:21:48.74 a call about my other grandfather,her father 00:21:48.78\00:21:52.86 he was sick 00:21:52.89\00:21:54.31 again it came at a time when I was extremely busy 00:21:54.35\00:21:58.15 it came at a time when so much was pressing in on me 00:21:58.18\00:22:01.95 he was in a hospital,my mum said 00:22:01.98\00:22:04.60 it would be great if I could give him a call 00:22:04.64\00:22:07.12 I said ok,this had happened before, 00:22:07.15\00:22:09.63 he'd been in the hospital before 00:22:09.66\00:22:12.07 I'd received calls from my mum before 00:22:12.11\00:22:14.27 mums do that kind of thing 00:22:14.30\00:22:15.61 they are given permission 00:22:15.64\00:22:16.88 to negace a little bit about calling our loved ones 00:22:16.92\00:22:20.05 and so I excepted her number,I said:I'll call 00:22:20.08\00:22:22.90 the truth was,I was so busy 00:22:22.93\00:22:25.11 I said:you know,I'm not gonna get around this right away 00:22:25.15\00:22:27.94 but I put it on my deck and I said:I'll call on Thursday 00:22:27.98\00:22:30.74 my mum called back 00:22:30.77\00:22:33.93 the next day 00:22:33.96\00:22:35.09 and I again was kind of busy 00:22:35.13\00:22:38.44 and I said: 00:22:38.47\00:22:39.65 you know,mum,I'm gonna give him a call,I'm gonna call him 00:22:39.69\00:22:43.75 the next time my mother called I got a little perturbed 00:22:43.79\00:22:47.78 I couldn't believe that my mum didn't understand my schedule 00:22:47.82\00:22:51.18 "I'm an important person",so I thought 00:22:51.21\00:22:53.48 I'm very busy 00:22:53.51\00:22:55.35 but this time the phone call was different 00:22:55.39\00:22:58.09 this time the call was very different 00:22:58.12\00:23:00.81 because my mum said: 00:23:00.84\00:23:03.56 papa died 00:23:03.59\00:23:05.88 and I said to myself:wait a second,that can't be 00:23:05.92\00:23:11.30 papa can't die 00:23:11.33\00:23:12.55 I haven't gold[?] it yet 00:23:12.59\00:23:16.16 the very sad moment when I realized that 00:23:16.20\00:23:20.41 I've been so caught up in busy-ness 00:23:20.44\00:23:22.96 that I had not taken the time 00:23:22.99\00:23:25.88 to do what mattered 00:23:25.91\00:23:27.37 so,though all the busy-ness 00:23:27.41\00:23:29.52 with all the hectic schedule 00:23:29.56\00:23:31.60 with all the crazy things going on 00:23:31.64\00:23:33.70 I cancelled everything 00:23:33.73\00:23:37.06 what had been too important to call 00:23:37.10\00:23:40.66 now was insignificant 00:23:40.69\00:23:42.16 and I cancelled everything and went to papa's funersl 00:23:42.20\00:23:46.11 and I finally got to tell papa what I wanted to tell him 00:23:46.15\00:23:50.03 but papa didn't hear 00:23:50.06\00:23:52.80 why do we wait? 00:23:52.83\00:23:56.02 I wonder also 00:23:56.05\00:23:59.17 I had always thought there would be the other opportunities 00:23:59.21\00:24:02.15 to talk to my papa 00:24:02.18\00:24:03.91 about Jesus 00:24:03.94\00:24:05.20 I always assumed there would be other opportunities 00:24:05.24\00:24:07.59 to sit down and make sure he knew about 00:24:07.62\00:24:09.85 the love of Christ 00:24:09.88\00:24:11.82 I always assumed there'd be another day 00:24:11.86\00:24:14.34 now,I was overwhelmed with the funeral 00:24:14.38\00:24:16.83 wondering:did papa know Jesus? 00:24:16.86\00:24:20.25 why didn't I talk to him about Jesus 00:24:20.29\00:24:23.02 why did I put it off, why do we wait? 00:24:23.06\00:24:25.72 why do we put off all these things that we need to do today 00:24:25.76\00:24:30.47 till other times? 00:24:30.50\00:24:32.45 why? 00:24:32.48\00:24:34.87 at the funeral I realized 00:24:34.91\00:24:38.35 that life was too short 00:24:38.39\00:24:41.80 to let it go on 00:24:41.83\00:24:43.28 without concentrating on every day 00:24:43.32\00:24:45.98 someone once gave an illustration 00:24:46.01\00:24:48.77 he accounted as the Bible accounts, 00:24:48.80\00:24:50.99 seventy years for a person to live 00:24:51.03\00:24:53.19 and multiplied that by 00:24:53.22\00:24:54.48 52 weeks 00:24:54.51\00:24:55.48 and it came up with the number of Sabbaths 00:24:55.49\00:24:57.15 that a person was estimated to live 00:24:57.18\00:24:59.05 of course, people live longer than that 00:24:59.09\00:25:00.93 but that's our goal 00:25:00.96\00:25:02.34 and it put marbles 00:25:02.38\00:25:03.58 in a container 00:25:03.62\00:25:04.75 for the number of weeks 00:25:04.79\00:25:06.12 that he had remaining until he reached seventy years 00:25:06.16\00:25:09.57 every week he would reach in and [?] marble out 00:25:09.60\00:25:13.27 indicating that that week had gone 00:25:13.30\00:25:15.87 what had he done for Christ that week? 00:25:15.90\00:25:18.44 I was to do the same thing 00:25:18.47\00:25:21.05 so I did the same thing 00:25:21.08\00:25:22.96 I was getting used MNMs 00:25:23.00\00:25:24.85 and I decided not 00:25:24.88\00:25:26.66 to eat my years before that happened 00:25:26.70\00:25:28.83 so I used beans 00:25:28.86\00:25:30.45 and I counted the number of years that I had 00:25:30.49\00:25:32.49 and every week I pulled out a bean 00:25:32.52\00:25:34.85 and I said to myself: 00:25:34.88\00:25:36.14 what have I done with this week 00:25:36.18\00:25:37.46 that God has given me 00:25:37.49\00:25:38.55 what have I done with this time 00:25:38.59\00:25:40.33 that it's been given 00:25:40.36\00:25:41.79 and granted to me? 00:25:41.83\00:25:43.19 sometimes I find myself reaching in and realizing that 00:25:43.23\00:25:46.64 the last week has drifted by 00:25:46.67\00:25:48.54 and I haven't spent any time with God 00:25:48.58\00:25:50.77 haven't spent any time with family 00:25:50.81\00:25:52.97 and it's a gentle reminder 00:25:53.00\00:25:54.95 now,some people say: 00:25:54.98\00:25:55.95 what happens if you get past seventy? 00:25:55.96\00:25:57.31 praise God! 00:25:57.34\00:25:58.31 praise the Lord,people live to 110 00:25:58.32\00:26:00.83 the gentleman that told the illustration 00:26:00.87\00:26:03.09 he started putting the marbles back in 00:26:03.12\00:26:05.31 after each week 00:26:05.34\00:26:06.39 as a special reminder 00:26:06.43\00:26:08.18 that that was a special gift 00:26:08.22\00:26:09.97 given to him by God 00:26:10.00\00:26:12.12 what would be our legacy 00:26:12.16\00:26:14.27 what will they remember 00:26:14.30\00:26:16.34 when our days on life are gone? 00:26:16.38\00:26:19.62 will they remember you drove a big car? 00:26:19.66\00:26:21.73 will they remember what job you had? 00:26:21.77\00:26:23.77 will they remember how much money you had? 00:26:23.81\00:26:25.80 will they remember how you looked? 00:26:25.83\00:26:27.56 what is the legacy that we want to live 00:26:27.60\00:26:31.29 for Christ? 00:26:31.32\00:26:32.31 I pray that it's a legacy of love 00:26:32.35\00:26:35.05 of loving other people 00:26:35.08\00:26:37.10 of caring 00:26:37.13\00:26:38.39 there's a precious song 00:26:38.43\00:26:40.29 that's entitled:"what would be said 00:26:40.33\00:26:43.49 when it's all said and done?" 00:26:43.52\00:26:45.30 reading the words 00:26:45.33\00:26:47.41 "when the music fades 00:26:47.45\00:26:49.50 into the past 00:26:49.53\00:26:51.05 when my days of life are through 00:26:51.09\00:26:53.81 what will be remembered 00:26:53.84\00:26:55.67 of where I've come 00:26:55.70\00:26:57.02 when all is said and done 00:26:57.06\00:26:58.88 will they say I loved my family? 00:26:58.92\00:27:01.63 that I was a faithful friend? 00:27:01.67\00:27:04.31 that I lived to tell of God's own son? 00:27:04.35\00:27:08.27 when all is said and done? 00:27:08.30\00:27:11.88 how I long to see the hour 00:27:11.91\00:27:15.42 when I will hear the trumpet sound 00:27:15.46\00:27:17.27 and rise to see my Saviour's face 00:27:17.30\00:27:19.08 and see his smile 00:27:19.11\00:27:20.66 and hear him say: 00:27:20.69\00:27:22.21 well done! 00:27:22.24\00:27:23.48 you can forget my names 00:27:23.52\00:27:25.21 and all the songs I've sung 00:27:25.24\00:27:26.86 every rhyme and every tune 00:27:26.90\00:27:28.72 but remember the truth 00:27:28.76\00:27:30.55 of Jesus' love 00:27:30.58\00:27:32.40 when all is said and done" 00:27:32.44\00:27:36.59 friends,what's most important: 00:27:36.63\00:27:40.75 our relationships 00:27:40.78\00:27:42.75 loving God with all your heart 00:27:42.79\00:27:45.02 with all your soul and loving others for him 00:27:45.06\00:27:47.00 thank you for watching 00:27:47.03\00:27:48.83 and may we put people first 00:27:48.87\00:27:50.87 in all things 00:27:50.90\00:27:53.78 and love for ourself 00:27:53.82\00:27:54.93