Participants: Doug Batchelor
Series Code: EG
Program Code: EG021537A
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00:00 (MUSIC)
00:10 >>FRIENDS, WE'RE OUT HERE IN THE PACIFIC OCEAN NOT 00:12 TOO FAR FROM THE ISLAND OF FIJI AND WE'RE GETTING READY TO LOOK 00:15 AT SOME WONDERS IN THE DEEP. THE BIBLE SAYS GOD MADE THE 00:19 HEAVEN, THE EARTH, AND THE SEA. AND THERE ARE THINGS UNDER THE 00:22 SEA THAT ARE BEAUTIFUL THAT MANY PEOPLE HAVE NEVER SEEN. 00:25 SOME FOLKS MIGHT JUST SKIM ALONG - SNORKEL - ON THE SURFACE, BUT 00:28 IF YOU WANT TO SEE THE REAL MAJESTY OF THE OCEAN, YOU'VE GOT 00:31 TO GO DEEPER. (MUSIC) 00:46 >>BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T HAVE GILLS LIKE FISH, WE HAVE TO 00:49 DO SOMETHING EXTRAORDINARY TO BE ABLE TO BREATHE BELOW THE 00:52 SURFACE. AND BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO BREATHE 00:54 ALL THE TIME, WE NEED THIS SPECIAL EQUIPMENT. 01:00 IN THE SAME WAY, THE BIBLE SAYS A CHRISTIAN NEEDS TO PRAY 01:02 WITHOUT CEASING. WE NEED TO ALWAYS BE BREATHING 01:05 THE ATMOSPHERE OF HEAVEN IF WE'RE GOING TO LIVE A CHRISTIAN 01:07 LIFE IN THIS WORLD BELOW. WOW, WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD. 01:48 >>DEEP WITHIN THE PAGES OF THE BIBLE, STORIES OF GREAT HEROES, 01:53 HEROES OF GREAT DEEDS, GREAT LOVE AND GREAT SACRIFICE. 02:02 BUT BEHIND THEM IS ANOTHER HERO HIDDEN IN PLAIN SIGHT AMID THE 02:07 SHADOWS. HE WAS THERE FROM THE BEGINNING 02:13 AND HE'LL BE THERE UNTIL THE END. 02:17 DISCOVER THE GOLDEN THREAD OF A SAVIOR WOVEN THROUGHOUT THE 02:21 ENTIRE BIBLE TAPESTRY. SHADOWS OF LIGHT: SEEING JESUS 02:28 IN ALL THE BIBLE - A NEW BOOK BY DOUG BATCHELOR. 02:33 GET YOUR COPY TODAY BY CALLING 800-538-7275 OR VISIT 02:38 AFBOOKSTORE.COM . ONCE AGAIN, TO PURCHASE YOUR 02:41 COPY OF SHADOWS OF LIGHT , CALL 800-538-7275. (MUSIC) 03:02 >>OUR MESSAGE FOR TODAY, 03:05 AND IT'S GOING TO BE MAYBE A TWO- OR THREE-PART MESSAGE, IS 03:08 GOING TO BE CALLED TOGETHER FOR LIFE - TOGETHER FOR LIFE: BIBLE 03:12 KEYS FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE . AND MARRIAGE IS THE FOUNDATIONAL 03:19 INSTITUTION FOR THE NATION AND FOR SOCIETY. IT'S TYPICALLY HOW 03:27 PEOPLE COME INTO THE WORLD. IT'S HOW NATIONS ARE BORN. 03:31 IT'S WHERE THE FIRST TEACHING TRANSPIRES. 03:33 IT FORMS YOU AS A PERSON. MARRIAGE IS VERY IMPORTANT. 03:37 PEOPLE PUT A LOT OF EMPHASIS ON, YOU KNOW, HAVING EXTRAVAGANT 03:40 WEDDINGS AND DOING UNIQUE, OR SOMETIMES EVEN ZANY THINGS, IN 03:46 THEIR WEDDING, BUT IN ALL OF THAT, MAYBE IT LOSES ITS 03:51 SACREDNESS. MUCH OF THE WORLD TUNED IN 2011 03:56 FOR THE GLOBALLY BROADCAST WEDDING OF PRINCE WILLIAM AND 04:01 KATE MIDDLETON. IT WAS A PRINCE'S WEDDING AND 04:07 THEY SAY THAT IT COST 34 MILLION DOLLARS. WEDDING CAKE - 04:14 $80,000.00. $800,000.00 IN FLOWERS FOR THE WEDDING. 04:21 BUT THOSE OF YOU WHO REMEMBER, BACK IN 1981, IT WAS ACTUALLY 04:25 THE MARRIAGE OF WILLIAM'S MOTHER AND PRINCE CHARLES THAT WAS 04:29 CALLED THE WEDDING OF THE CENTURY. 04:33 YOU KNOW, DI'S DRESS WAS ONLY $13,000.00 BUT THAT WAS - 04:37 BACK THEN, THAT WAS A LOT MORE MONEY. 04:39 MATTER OF FACT, IF YOU ADJUST FOR INFLATION, THEIR WEDDING, 04:43 TODAY, WOULD HAVE COST $70 MILLION DOLLARS. 04:47 THAT WAS MOSTLY FOR CROWD CONTROL AND SECURITY. 04:52 REALLY, THAT'S WHERE MOST OF IT WENT. 04:55 YOU KNOW, IT WAS SORT OF THAT FAIRY TALE STORY ABOUT THE 04:59 PRINCE MARRYING THE DAUGHTER OF A COMMONER, AND IT'S INTERESTING 05:05 THAT PRINCESS DI, HERSELF, HER PARENTS HAD DIVORCED. 05:09 WHEN SHE WAS VERY YOUNG, ONE DAY HER MOTHER TOLD HER, SHE SAID, 05:13 'I'LL BE HOME SOON.' AND SHE NEVER CAME HOME. 05:17 AND IT REALLY TROUBLED HER FOR MANY YEARS AFTER THAT. 05:22 WHEN PRINCE CHARLES BEGAN TO DATE DI'S SISTER, SHE TOLD HER 05:27 FRIENDS, SHE SAID, 'I'M GOING TO MARRY THAT MAN.' 05:29 AND THEY SAID, 'WHAT MAKES YOU SO SURE?' 05:31 SHE SAYS, 'I'VE GOT TO MARRY HIM BECAUSE HE'S THE ONLY MAN IN THE 05:34 WORLD THAT IS NOT ALLOWED TO DIVORCE ME.' AND THEN, THOSE OF 05:39 YOU WHO REMEMBER THE STORY, IT UNRAVELED FOR ALL THE WORLD TO 05:42 WATCH WITH, EVIDENTLY, UNFAITHFULNESS ON BOTH SIDES - 05:47 ENDED IN DIVORCE AND, ULTIMATELY, A TRAGIC DEATH. 05:53 IN OUR WORLD TODAY, DIVORCE IS EPIDEMIC. 05:57 YOU'VE PROBABLY HEARD THAT STATISTICS THAT SOMEWHERE 05:59 BETWEEN 40 AND 50 PERCENT OF MARRIAGES END IN DIVORCE. 06:03 THE REASON THAT THOSE STATISTICS ARE SO SLOPPY IS BECAUSE SO MANY 06:07 PEOPLE LIVE TODAY WITHOUT EVEN THE BENEFIT OF MARRIAGE, 06:09 IT'S HARD TO REALLY MEASURE IT. 06:13 I BELIEVE IT WAS - SOMEONE THINKS, MAYBE, 'WELL, MAYBE THE 06:18 SECOND MARRIAGE'LL BE BETTER.' 60 PERCENT OF SECOND MARRIAGES 06:22 END IN DIVORCE AND IT'S EVEN WORSE FOR THIRD MARRIAGES. 06:29 PAIGE PATTERSON, WHO WAS THE PRESIDENT OF THE BAPTIST 06:34 THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY IN FORT WORTH, CITING THE DEMISE OF 21 06:38 OF THE WORLD'S GREAT CIVILIZATIONS - ACTUALLY, THE 06:42 HISTORIAN WHO WROTE ABOUT THIS WAS AN ATHEIST, BUT HE SAID THAT 06:44 HE DISCOVERED THAT AMONG THE 21 OF THE WORLD'S GREATEST 06:48 CIVILIZATIONS, PART OF THEIR BREAKDOWN WAS THE BREAKDOWN OF 06:53 THE HOME. ADDING TO THAT, HE SAID, 'AMERICA COULD BE LIVING 06:57 OUT ITS FINAL CHAPTERS IN THE ANNALS OF HISTORY UNLESS THE 07:01 BIBLICAL MODEL FOR THE FAMILY IS RESTORED. 07:05 JAMES DOBSON SAID, IN MAY OF THIS YEAR, 'I DO NOT RECALL A 07:10 TIME WHEN THE INSTITUTIONS OF MARRIAGE AND THE FAMILY HAVE 07:13 FACED SUCH PERIL, OR WHEN THE FORCES ARRAYED AGAINST THEM 07:16 WERE MORE FORMIDABLE OR DETERMINED. 07:19 BARRING A MIRACLE, THE FAMILY THAT HAS EXISTED SINCE ANTIQUITY 07:23 WILL LIKELY CRUMBLE FORESHADOWING THE FALL OF 07:26 WESTERN CIVILIZATION ITSELF.' AND MANY ARE WONDERING IF WHAT 07:32 HAPPENED WITH THE SUPREME COURT AT THAT RECENT RULING ON 07:35 MARRIAGE WAS DRIVING A SILVER SPIKE IN THE HEART OF AMERICAN 07:38 MARRIAGE ALTOGETHER. WELL, WHAT DO WE DO? 07:44 DO WE THROW OUR HANDS IN THE AIR AND SAY, 07:45 'WELL, I GUESS THAT'S THE END OF MARRIAGE'? 07:48 THERE WAS A PEW SURVEY THAT WENT OUT - I BELIEVE LAST YEAR - AND 07:51 AN INCREASING NUMBER - WAS IT 40 PERCENT OF AMERICANS FELT 07:54 MARRIAGE MAY BECOME - MAY BE BECOMING IRRELEVANT - THIS 07:59 INSTITUTION THAT IS THE BEDROCK FOUNDATION OF OUR CULTURE. 08:05 WELL, YOU KNOW, THE BIBLE SAYS THAT MARRIAGE IS GOD'S PLAN. 08:09 YOU READ THE BIBLE, IT BEGINS WITH A WEDDING AND GOD 08:14 OFFICIATES AT THE FIRST WEDDING BETWEEN ADAM AND EVE. 08:18 THE BIBLE ENDS WITH THE WEDDING SUPPER OF THE LAMB. 08:22 THE FIRST MIRACLE OF JESUS IS PERFORMED AT A WEDDING. 08:26 A MARRIAGE WAS VERY IMPORTANT TO THE LORD. 08:28 READ THE SONG OF SOLOMON AND SO MANY OF THE OTHER STORIES - 08:31 WHETHER IT'S HOSEA OR A NUMBER OF OTHERS - THEY'RE DONE - THE 08:35 PARABLES OF JESUS ARE OFTEN IN THE CONTEXT OF A WEDDING. 08:39 MARRIAGE IS A VERY IMPORTANT TRUTH TO GOD AND IT IS, AS I 08:43 SAID, IT'S A FOUNDATIONAL - IT IS THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT 08:47 BASIC UNIT IN OUR LIVES AND CULTURE. 08:51 YOU KNOW, MARRIAGE, REPRODUCTION IS ONE OF THE GREATEST MYSTERIES 08:57 THAT EVOLUTIONISTS CANNOT EXPLAIN. IT'S A MIRACLE. 09:02 BECAUSE, IF ALL LIFE ON EARTH BEGAN BY SINGLE-CELLED ORGANISMS 09:08 SOMEHOW TEACHING THEMSELVES TO DIVIDE AND RETAIN ALL OF THE DNA 09:13 AND THEIR TWO SEPARATE PARTS, WHAT WOULD EVER IN THE 09:17 EVOLUTIONARY SCHEME OF THINGS, EXPLAIN WHY ORGANISMS COULD NOT 09:23 PROCREATE AND REPRODUCE WITHOUT THE COOPERATION OF THE OPPOSITE 09:29 SEX. IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. 09:31 THERE'S NOTHING IN EVOLUTION THAT WOULD EVER SAY, 'LET'S DO 09:34 IT THIS WAY.' BECAUSE IT SEEMS INEFFICIENT. 09:37 I MEAN, WHEN YOU WANT TO START A FAMILY, IF YOU'RE A SINGLE CELL, 09:39 JUST SPLIT AND THERE YOU GO. RIGHT? 09:42 BUT TO HAVE TO GET ALONG WITH AND COURT AND MAKE FRIENDS WITH 09:45 ANOTHER CELL OF AN OPPOSITE GENDER SO THAT YOU COULD 09:50 COOPERATE AND REPRODUCE, NOTHING IN EVOLUTION CAN EXPLAIN THAT. 09:57 BUT GOD HAS DESIGNED THAT HE MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE - 10:01 >>AMEN! >>AND THROUGH THE TWO OF THEM, 10:07 THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN, WE COLLECTIVELY 10:12 EXPRESS THE IMAGE OF GOD. >>AMEN. 10:16 >>THERE ARE ASPECTS OF THE IMAGE OF GOD THAT ARE SEEN IN THE 10:19 WOMAN AND THE MOTHER AND THERE ARE ASPECTS OF THE IMAGE OF GOD 10:22 THAT ARE SEEN IN THE MAN AND THE FATHER AND IT IS NOT REALLY 10:26 COMPLETE UNTIL YOU SEE THEM BOTH TOGETHER. 10:29 THEY BECOME ONE THROUGH MARRIAGE. 10:34 THE LORD SAID - GENESIS CHAPTER 2, VERSE 18 - 10:39 "IT IS NOT GOOD THAT MAN SHOULD BE ALONE." 10:42 NOW, I KNOW, WHENEVER I TALK ABOUT A MESSAGE LIKE THIS, 10:44 THERE'S ALWAYS A LOT OF SINGLES THAT ARE HERE, SOME WHO HAVE 10:47 NEVER BEEN MARRIED, SOME WHO HAVE BEEN MARRIED AND MAYBE 10:49 DIVORCED - OR MAYBE WIDOWED - AND YOU'RE THINKING, 10:52 'HOW DO I FIT INTO ALL OF THIS?' 10:53 WELL, BEAR WITH ME AND - IN FOLLOWING PRESENTATIONS 10:57 WE'RE GOING TO BE TALKING ABOUT THAT IN RELATION TO FAMILY. 11:00 BUT GOD SAID IT'S NOT GOOD FOR MAN TO BE ALONE. 11:03 THAT'S NOT JUST TALKING ABOUT MARRIAGE, BUT MAN IS DESIGNED TO 11:05 BE A SOCIAL CREATURE. AND YOU CAN TAKE IT FROM ME, 11:09 I LIVED AS A HERMIT FOR A LONG TIME. 11:14 AND I ALWAYS LIKED TO SAY THAT THERE'S PROBABLY NOT TOO MANY 11:18 PEOPLE THAT ARE HERE TODAY OR LISTENING THAT CAN SAY THAT 11:22 YOU'VE GONE DAYS OR WEEKS WITHOUT SEEING ANOTHER HUMAN 11:24 FACE, HEARING ANOTHER HUMAN VOICE - NO RADIO - NO TV - NO 11:28 COMPUTER - NO HUMAN CONTACT - NO GUARDS COMING BY TO BRING YOU A 11:33 MEAL. YOU'RE JUST ALL BY YOURSELF. AND I CAN TELL YOU, 11:38 IT'S NOT GOOD FOR MAN TO BE ALONE. I JUST DID IT BECAUSE I 11:41 HAD TROUBLE GETTING ALONG, BUT BEING ALONE IS WORSE. 11:45 AND THE LORD FINALLY TAUGHT ME YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY FROM PEOPLE 11:47 ALL THE TIME, YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN TO GET ALONG. 11:50 AND, YOU KNOW, THAT'S PART OF THE REASON OF MARRIAGE IS THAT 11:54 THE LORD PUTS YOU TOGETHER WITH A PERSON AND THE VERY THINGS YOU 11:59 FIND SO ATTRACTIVE ABOUT THEM ARE THINGS THAT YOU USUALLY 12:02 DON'T POSSESS AND IT'S ALMOST OPPOSITE SOMETIMES AND GOD HAS A 12:09 SENSE OF HUMOR - OPPOSITES ATTRACT - AND THOSE VERY THINGS 12:12 THAT YOU LIKED SO MUCH BECAUSE THEY'RE DIFFERENT, END UP 12:15 BECOMING ANNOYING LATER AND THEY BECOME THE CATALYST FOR 12:21 SANCTIFYING YOU. THAT'S RIGHT. AND THE LORD SMILES FROM THE 12:26 HEAVENS AND SAYS, 'IF YOU LOVE ME, LOVE THEM.' IT'S NOT 12:34 GOOD FOR MAN TO BE ALONE. SOME OF YOU REMEMBER READING - 12:38 OR YOU HEARD ABOUT - THE STORY OF ROBINSON CRUSOE. 12:42 ROBINSON CRUSOE, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, IS ACTUALLY BASED ON THE 12:45 TRUE STORY OF A SAILOR BY THE NAME OF ALEXANDER SELKIRK, WHO 12:50 GOT INTO A VERY SEVERE ARGUMENT - HE HAD TROUBLE GETTING ALONG - 12:53 AND HE GOT INTO A SEVERE ARGUMENT WITH THE CAPTAIN, 12:56 DAMPIERRE, WHO PUT HIM OFF ON AN ISLAND WHEN THEY STOPPED. 13:00 HE SAID, 'I'D RATHER LIVE BY MYSELF AND THE NEXT SHIP'LL PICK 13:03 ME UP.' THEY PUT HIM OFF ON AN ISLAND 13:05 OFF OF CHILE CALLED SAN FERNANDO - HUNDREDS OF MILES 13:08 OUT IN THE OCEAN - AND LEFT HIM THERE. 13:11 WELL, IT WAS YEARS BEFORE ANOTHER SHIP CAME BY. 13:14 AND THERE WAS NOTHING ON THE ISLAND BUT SOME CATS THAT 13:17 ESCAPED AND MULTIPLIED AND SOME GOATS AND RATS. 13:21 AND HE WAS EXTREMELY LONELY. 13:27 WELL, HE EVENTUALLY SORT OF LEARNED TO GET ALONG AND MADE 13:29 FRIENDS WITH THE GOATS AND LEARNED HOW TO SURVIVE AND WHEN 13:33 THEY FINALLY FOUND HIM AND RESCUED HIM - ANOTHER SHIP CAME 13:35 BY - THEY SAID THEY HAD A HARD TIME TALKING TO HIM BECAUSE HE 13:39 HAD NOT COMMUNICATED WITH PEOPLE IN SO LONG THAT HIS SENTENCES 13:42 WERE SORT OF SHORT AND MUTTERING AND GARBLED. 13:45 MATTER OF FACT, I THINK IT WAS ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON - HIS 13:47 BOOK TREASURE ISLAND - HE TALKS ABOUT A HERMIT THAT WAS FOUND - 13:51 HE BASED SOME OF THAT ON THE WAY THAT ALEXANDER SELKIRK 13:56 COMMUNICATED. THROUGH THE LACK OF SOCIAL 14:00 CONTEXT HE BECAME ECCENTRIC. AND WHEN WE LIVE UNTO OURSELVES, 14:06 WE BECOME EMOTIONALLY AND SOCIALLY UNHEALTHY. 14:11 IT IS NOT GOOD THAT A MAN SHOULD BE ALONE. 14:13 MARRIAGE IS PART OF GOD'S PLAN FOR MEN AND WOMEN. 14:17 NOW, SOMETIMES IT'S, I THINK, HARDER FOR MEN AND A 14:22 NINE-YEAR-OLD GIRL SAID THAT'S BECAUSE MEN NEED SOMEONE TO 14:24 CLEAN UP AFTER THEM. (LAUGHTER) BUT IT'S PART OF GOD'S PLAN. 14:30 NOW THERE'S A NUMBER OF BOOKS THAT'LL TELL YOU ABOUT THIS AND 14:34 SO, PROBABLY WHAT I'M GOING TO SAY IS NOTHING NEW. 14:36 SOME PEOPLE TALK ABOUT MEN BEING FROM MARS AND WOMEN BEING FROM 14:41 VENUS AND THERE'S ANOTHER - A NUMBER OF OTHER SCENARIOS ABOUT 14:44 HOW MEN AND WOMEN ARE SO UNIQUELY DIFFERENT. 14:48 CHUCK SWINDOLL, IN A BOOK CALLED THE GREAT AWAKENING , HE REVEALS 14:51 A SURVEY THAT WAS DONE AMONG THOUSANDS OF MEN AND WOMEN, 14:55 ABOUT WHAT THEY EXPRESSED AS THEIR FIVE MAJOR NEEDS. 14:58 NOW LISTEN TO WHAT THE FIVE MAJOR NEEDS OF A WOMAN - 15:03 WHAT SHE IS LOOKING FOR IN A RELATIONSHIP: 1) AFFECTION. 15:08 2) CONVERSATION. 3) HONESTY AND OPENNESS. 15:13 4) FINANCIAL SUPPORT. 5) FAMILY COMMITMENT. 15:18 THE FIVE MAJOR NEEDS EXPRESSED BY MEN: 1) SEXUAL FULFILLMENT. 15:25 2) RECREATIONAL COMPANIONSHIP. 3) AN ATTRACTIVE SPOUSE. 15:29 4) DOMESTIC SUPPORT - WHATEVER THAT MEANS. 15:32 (LAUGHTER) 5) ADMIRATION AND RESPECT. 15:36 NOW WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE NEEDS AND EXPECTATIONS COMING INTO A 15:39 MARRIAGE, CAN YOU SEE, JUST FROM THE SURVEYS OF THE GENERALITIES 15:43 OF WHAT MEN ARE LOOKING FOR AND WHAT WOMEN ARE LOOKING FOR, 15:46 THAT THERE'S POTENTIAL FOR PROBLEMS? 15:48 (LAUGHTER) BECAUSE THERE ARE EXTREMELY DIFFERENT NEEDS AND 15:52 EXPECTATIONS COMING INTO THESE RELATIONSHIPS. 15:57 NOW, I DON'T WANT TO DWELL TOO MUCH ABOUT THIS, BUT IT'S 16:00 SOMETHING THAT WE PROBABLY ARE GOING TO HAVE TO TALK ABOUT. 16:02 WHAT ARE THE MAIN REASONS THAT DIVORCE HAPPENS? 16:06 I'M JUST GOING TO GIVE YOU 24 OF THE TOP REASONS THAT ARE LISTED 16:10 WHEN PEOPLE CITE THE REASONS FOR DIVORCE. 16:14 FINANCIAL PROBLEMS - YOU KNOW, A LOT OF PEOPLE THEY THINK, 'WELL, 16:19 BEFORE WE GET MARRIED WE SHOULD LIVE TOGETHER SO WE GET TO KNOW 16:22 EACH OTHER TO FIND OUT IF WE'RE COMPATIBLE.' HAVE YOU HEARD THAT 16:25 ONE BEFORE? 'WELL, YOU GUYS AREN'T MARRIED. 16:28 WHY ARE YOU LIVING TOGETHER?' 'WELL, WE'RE JUST - WE WANT 16:29 TO MAKE SURE WE'RE COMPATIBLE BEFORE WE, YOU KNOW, MAKE IT 16:31 OFFICIAL AND...' AND I HEARD A PASTOR SAY IF YOU WANT TO FIND 16:34 OUT IF YOU'RE COMPATIBLE, YOU DON'T NEED TO SHARE A BED. 16:36 SHARE A CHECKBOOK, BECAUSE THE NUMBER ONE REASON THAT PEOPLE 16:40 GET DIVORCED IS NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE SEXUALLY INCOMPATIBLE, IT'S 16:44 THEY'RE FINANCIALLY INCOMPATIBLE. 16:47 FINANCIAL PROBLEMS - NUMBER ONE. INABILITY TO MANAGE 16:51 OR RESOLVE CONFLICT. INFIDELITY. 16:55 CULTURAL AND LIFESTYLE DIFFERENCES. 16:59 NOW THAT'S - SOMETIMES IT'S BIGGER THAN YOU THINK. 17:01 PEOPLE AND THEY GROW UP IN A WHOLE DIFFERENT CULTURE WITH 17:03 DIFFERENT EXPECTATIONS AND DIFFERENT PATTERNS AND 17:06 TRADITIONS THAT CAN SEEM SO BIZARRE TO PEOPLE FROM A 17:10 DIFFERENT CULTURE. A LACK OF COMMITMENT IS PUT DOWN. 17:15 LACK OF COMMUNICATION BETWEEN SPOUSES. 17:19 ABANDONMENT. ALCOHOL OR DRUG ADDICTION. 17:22 PHYSICAL ABUSE. EMOTIONAL ABUSE. PERSONALITY DIFFERENCES OR 17:28 IRRECONCILABLE DIFFERENCES - HAVE YOU HEARD THAT BEFORE? 17:31 DIFFERENCES IN PERSONAL OR CAREER GOALS. 17:35 DIFFERENT EXPECTATIONS ABOUT HOUSEHOLD TASKS. 17:38 THEY GET DIVORCED BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT HE WAS GOING TO DO IT 17:41 AND HE THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO DO IT. 17:44 DIFFERENT EXPECTATIONS ABOUT HAVING OR REARING CHILDREN - 17:47 THAT'S A BIG ONE. INTERFERENCE FROM 17:49 PARENTS OR IN-LAWS. LACK OF MATURITY IS 17:53 LISTED AS A DIFFERENCE. INTELLECTUAL INCOMPATIBILITY - 17:57 SOMETIMES JUST THE EDUCATIONAL LEVEL CAN BECOME A PROBLEM. 18:03 SEXUAL INCOMPATIBILITY IS LISTED, BUT IT'S PRETTY FAR DOWN 18:06 THE LIST. NOT ALLOWING ROOM FOR PERSONAL 18:08 GROWTH. FALLING OUT OF LOVE - ALMOST 18:12 SOUNDS LIKE SOMEBODY LEFT THE LID OFF THE SEPTIC TANK AND 18:15 SOMEBODY FELL IN LOVE AND THEN THEY SOMEHOW FELL OUT ALSO. 18:17 (LAUGHTER) YOU'LL FALL OUT OF LOVE - IT'S LIKE FALLING UP. 18:22 RELIGIOUS CONVERSION OR RELIGIOUS BELIEFS - I'VE SEEN 18:25 THAT BECOME A SERIOUS ISSUE. MENTAL INSTABILITY OR MENTAL 18:29 ILLNESS. CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR AND 18:32 INCARCERATION FOR CRIME - IT'S VERY HARD ON MARRIAGES WHEN ONE 18:36 SPOUSE IS INCARCERATED FOR A LONG PERIOD OF TIME. 18:40 INABILITY TO DEAL WITH EACH OTHER'S PETTY IDIOSYNCRASIES. 18:45 NOW, YOU MIGHT FIND THAT SOME OF THESE ARE ISSUES IN YOUR 18:49 MARRIAGES - THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE MARRIED HERE - BUT NONE OF THEM 18:52 NEEDS TO BE THE REASON FOR DIVORCE. 18:56 AND I'M GOING TO GO THROUGH A LIST OF MAYBE 18 DIFFERENT 19:02 SUBJECTS THAT ARE BIBLE SECRETS AND, IF WE UNDERSTAND THESE 19:06 THINGS, THEY CAN REALLY CONTRIBUTE TO HEALING A MARRIAGE 19:10 AND MAKING A GOOD MARRIAGE BETTER IF WE FOLLOW THESE 19:13 PRINCIPLES. FIRST OF ALL, 1) REMEMBER THAT 19:17 MARRIAGE IS A DIVINE COVENANT. 19:20 IT IS SOMETHING THAT IS VERY SERIOUS. 19:23 WE ARE SAVED - YOU'RE IN CHURCH TODAY BECAUSE, OSTENSIBLY, YOU 19:26 WANT TO BE OR ARE A CHRISTIAN AND WE ARE SAVED BASED ON A 19:30 COVENANT - A PROMISE - THAT GOD HAS MADE TO US. 19:33 HE GAVE HIS SON TO SAVE US AND WE, BY FAITH, ACCEPT HIS WORD 19:37 AND WE MAKE A PLEDGE THAT WE'RE GOING TO COMMIT OUR LIVES TO 19:40 HIM. THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED 19:41 TODAY WITH THESE BAPTISMS. A COVENANT IS MADE - COVENANTS, 19:45 AGREEMENTS, PROMISES - VERY IMPORTANT. 19:50 MARRIAGE IS AMONG THE MOST IMPORTANT COVENANTS OR PROMISES 19:55 THAT ARE MADE. YOU'RE MAKING VOWS IN THE 19:58 PRESENCE OF GOD AND OTHER WITNESSES. 20:00 IT'S A COVENANT THAT'S NOT ONLY SOMETHING THAT IS DONE BEFORE 20:01 YOU AND GOD, IT'S SOMETHING THAT IS DONE SOCIALLY - AND I SHOULD 20:05 PROBABLY PAUSE HERE AND SAY - AND, I KNOW, I'M GOING TO GET 20:08 LETTERS ON THIS. PEOPLE SAY, 'WELL, YOU KNOW, 20:11 WE'RE MARRIED IN THE EYES OF GOD. 20:14 BUT WE'RE NOT INTERESTED IN THE GOVERNMENT'S PART IN OUR 20:18 MARRIAGE AND SO, NO, WE HAVEN'T BEEN MARRIED WITH A LICENSE, BUT 20:21 WE BELIEVE WE'RE MARRIED AND WE DO IT BEFORE GOD AND IS IT 20:24 NECESSARY TO GO THROUGH THE CEREMONY AND GET REGISTERED WITH 20:27 THE STATE?' AND WHEN I WAS A YOUNG HIPPIE, I 20:29 WOULD HAVE ARGUED THAT ONE WAY, BUT AS I'VE GOTTEN A LITTLE 20:33 OLDER AND MORE PRACTICAL AND I READ THE BIBLE, I DON'T AGREE 20:36 WITH THAT. I THINK IT DOES MATTER THAT YOU 20:39 ARE LEGALLY MARRIED. BY THE WAY, I'VE ASKED COUPLES 20:41 BEFORE AND THEY SAY, 'WELL, WE'RE MARRIED IN THE EYES OF 20:43 GOD.' I SAY, 'WELL, WHERE ARE YOU LEGALLY MARRIED?' 20:45 AND THEY SAY, 'NO, BUT WE'RE MARRIED.' I SAY, 'WELL THEN, IF 20:48 YOU'RE NOT LEGALLY MARRIED, ALL THAT'S LEFT IS YOU'RE ILLEGALLY 20:50 MARRIED.' (LAUGHTER) AND I SAID, 'MARRIAGE IS NOT JUST BETWEEN 20:56 THE TWO OF YOU AND GOD. MARRIAGE IS ALSO SOMETHING THAT 20:59 IS A STATEMENT YOU MAKE PUBLICLY - SOCIALLY. IT'S A COMMITMENT - 21:04 A COVENANT - THAT MAKES, FOR ONE THING, IT IS SAYING PUBLICLY, 21:08 'WE ARE OFFICIALLY COMMITTING OURSELVES TO EACH OTHER. 21:10 SHE IS OFF THE MARKET FOR ANYONE ELSE THAT MIGHT BE INTERESTED.' 21:13 SHE'S SAYING, 'HE IS OFF THE MARKET. 21:15 WE ARE A NEW FAMILY UNIT THAT IS TO BE GUARDED AND RESPECTED BY 21:20 THE CULTURE AND SOCIETY.' IT IS A PUBLIC COMMITMENT. 21:24 AND IT USED TO BE THAT THE REASON THE GOVERNMENT WAS 21:26 INVOLVED IS BECAUSE THERE WAS OFFSPRING THAT WAS THE PRODUCT 21:30 OF THOSE UNIONS AND IF ONE OF THE SPOUSES DIED OR BOTH SPOUSES 21:36 DIED, THEY NEEDED TO DETERMINE HOW TO DEAL WITH THE CHILDREN 21:40 AND THEN, SOMETIMES, THE GOVERNMENT WOULD HAVE TO STEP IN 21:42 TO CARE FOR THOSE THINGS AND THERE WERE LAWS INVOLVED. 21:45 BUT IT DOES MATTER THAT YOU ARE LEGALLY MARRIED. 21:48 IS IT REQUIRED THAT YOU ARE MARRIED IN A CHURCH? 21:50 NO, IT DOESN'T SAY SO IN THE BIBLE, BUT I THINK IF YOU'RE A 21:54 CHRISTIAN YOU WOULD WANT IT TO BE A RELIGIOUS SERVICE BECAUSE 21:57 IT'S A COVENANT IN THE PRESENCE OF GOD AND YOU WANT TO COMMIT 22:01 YOUR LIVES TO GOD. >>AMEN. 22:04 >>JESUS SAID - MATTHEW 19, VERSE 5, "FOR THIS CAUSE A MAN WILL 22:08 LEAVE HIS FATHER AND HIS MOTHER AND CLEAVE UNTO HIS WIFE, 22:13 WHEREFORE THEY ARE NO MORE TWO BUT ONE FLESH. WHEREFORE, WHAT 22:17 GOD HAS JOINED TOGETHER LET NOT MAN PUT ASUNDER." 22:21 THE DISCIPLES CAME TO JESUS AND THEY SAID, 'WELL MOSES, HE GAVE 22:25 US A LAW ABOUT DIVORCE AND HOW WE ACCOMPLISH A DIVORCE AND 22:31 YOU'RE TEACHING SOMETHING DIFFERENT.' JESUS SAID, 'YES, 22:33 BECAUSE OF THE HARDNESS OF YOUR HEARTS MOSES MADE THOSE LAWS.' 22:39 THEY ACTUALLY HAD A LAW THAT, BY THE TIME OF CHRIST, A MAN COULD 22:43 DIVORCE HIS WIFE IF SHE BURNED HIS FOOD. 22:46 I MEAN, THEY KEPT EXPANDING WHAT THE EXCUSES FOR DIVORCE WERE 22:50 BECAUSE OF THE HARDNESS OF HEARTS. 22:52 AND GOD SAYS, 'I HATE DIVORCE.' AND THAT TRANSLATES 22:56 ABOUT THE SAME IN ANY VERSION OF THE BIBLE THAT YOU HAVE. 23:00 NOW, I KNOW THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE HERE ARE AFFECTED BY THIS AND I 23:04 NEED TO LET YOU KNOW, THERE ARE TIMES WHEN, BIBLICALLY, IT IS 23:07 APPROPRIATE TO DIVORCE. AS MUCH AS GOD HATES DIVORCE, 23:10 IT WAS GOD WHO TOLD ABRAHAM TO DIVORCE - PUT AWAY - HAGAR. 23:16 OF COURSE, HE HAD ONE WIFE TOO MANY AT THE TIME. 23:18 HE HAD TO DEAL WITH THAT. BUT LOOK AT ALL THE 23:20 HEARTACHE THAT IT BROUGHT. IT'S NEVER GOD'S PLAN. 23:25 NOW THERE'S SOME PEOPLE THAT IT SEEMS LIKE THEY LIKE MOSES' LAW 23:27 BETTER THAN JESUS. BUT JESUS SAID THAT WE 23:32 SHOULD LOVE EACH OTHER. THE DEVIL IS A 23:34 NOTORIOUS HOME BREAKER. YOU MIGHT BE THINKING, 'OH BOY, 23:38 THIS - THIS GAL - THIS MAN - THEY ARE SO IMPOSSIBLE. 23:42 THE THINGS THAT I HAVE TO LIVE WITH - THEIR HABITS - THEIR 23:44 IDIOSYNCRASIES - DRIVING ME CRAZY.' THINK OF YOURSELF AS A 23:47 MISSIONARY, IF YOU'RE A CHRISTIAN. 23:51 I'VE HEARD STORIES OF MISSIONARIES THAT GO INTO SOME 23:55 FOREIGN LAND AND THEY LEARN TO CARE FOR, LOVE, CLEAN, PAGANS - 24:03 AND YOU THINK, IF THEY CAN DO 24:05 THAT, THEN CAN YOU LOVE YOUR SPOUSE? 24:10 WE OFTEN ARE BEING INFLUENCED BY THE MEDIA AND THE IDEAS OF WHAT 24:15 LOVE AND MARRIAGE IS SUPPOSED TO BE. 24:17 A LOT OF IT IS, SORT OF, FANTASTIC AND IT MAKES EVERYONE 24:21 THINK, 'WELL, I DON'T HAVE IT PERFECT SO WE'RE UNHAPPY.' WELL, 24:25 DON'T FALL FOR THAT - THAT LINE OF WHAT MARRIAGE IS. 24:28 IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A COVENANT. 24:30 SOME OF YOU REMEMBER THE EXPRESSION, 'CUTTING THE GORDIAN 24:33 KNOT' - YOU EVER HEARD THAT EXPRESSION BEFORE? 24:35 CUTTING THE GORDIAN KNOT - MAYBE YOU HAVEN'T. 24:37 WELL, IT GOES BACK TO HISTORY THAT IS SUPPOSED TO BE BASED IN 24:41 SOME TRUTH - THAT THERE WAS THIS KING OF GORDIAN, AND HE WAS 24:45 MIRACULOUSLY - A PROPHET SAID, 'WHOEVER COMES INTO TOWN, HE'S 24:48 GOING TO BE THE KING.' AND THE FIRST GUY CAME INTO TOWN WITH 24:50 HIS WAGON AND ALL THE PEOPLE HAILED HIM AS KING AND CARRIED 24:54 HIM ON THEIR SHOULDERS AND HE THOUGHT THAT IT WAS, SOMEHOW, 24:57 THE WAGON WAS GOOD LUCK THAT DAY. 24:59 SO HE BROUGHT THE WAGON INTO THE TEMPLE AND HE HAD THEM SECURE 25:02 THE HITCH OF THE WAGON THROUGH THE EYE HOLE TO THIS ALTAR WITH 25:07 THIS GREAT BIG INTRICATE KNOT OF A BIG THICK ROPE AND HE SAID, 25:11 'WHEN I DIE, WHOEVER CAN UNTIE THIS KNOT, HE IS THE NEXT KING.' 25:15 WELL, HE DIED AND A HUNDRED YEARS WENT BY AND NOBODY COULD 25:17 UNTIE THE KNOT, UNTIL A YOUNG MACEDONIAN KING CAME INTO TOWN. 25:23 HIS NAME WAS ALEXANDER THE GREAT. 25:25 HE HAD HEARD THE LEGEND. HE SAW THE WAGON AND THE KNOT. 25:27 HE TRIED TO UNTIE IT FOR A FEW MINUTES AND HE REALIZED THAT IT 25:30 WAS TOO BIG AND TOO HARD AND TOO STIFF AND HE COULDN'T DO IT, SO 25:33 HE TOOK OUT HIS SHARP SWORD AND WITH ONE WHACK THAT THING FRAYED 25:36 APART AND HE CUT IT.' HE SAID, 'I HAVE UNTIED THE KNOT.' AND 25:41 WHEN YOU QUICKLY RESOLVE A DIFFICULT PROBLEM, IT'S CALLED 25:43 CUTTING THE GORDIAN KNOT. NOW ANY OF YOU 25:45 REMEMBER THAT STORY? A FEW OF YOU. 25:47 DID ANY OF YOU TAKE WORLD HISTORY? 25:50 (LAUGHTER) MARRIAGE KNOT SHOULD NEVER BE UNTIED. 26:00 WHEN YOU MAKE THAT COVENANT - WHEN YOU MAKE THAT COMMITMENT, 26:03 YOU WANT IT TO BE FIRM AND SEALED. 26:05 IT IS DANGEROUS TO GO INTO MARRIAGE THINKING THAT DIVORCE 26:09 IS AN OPTION BECAUSE IF YOU, IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND, EVEN 26:11 THINK IT, THEN YOU CAN END UP HAVING PROBLEMS. 26:17 SOME PEOPLE LOOK AT DIVORCE AS AN ESCAPE HATCH. I'D LIKE TO 26:20 RECOMMEND, IF YOU'RE A CHRISTIAN, SHUT THE HATCH, WELD 26:23 IT, LOCK IT, THROW AWAY THE KEY. >>AMEN. 26:26 >>AS SOON AS YOU KNOW IT'S NOT AN OPTION, AND YOU REALIZE THAT 26:29 YOU'RE ON A DESERTED ISLAND WITH THIS PERSON CALLED YOUR HUSBAND 26:32 OR YOUR WIFE, YOU'VE GOT TO GET ALONG. 26:36 THEN YOU START DOING YOUR BEST TO MAKE THE BEST OF IT. 26:38 NOW AGAIN, I RECOGNIZE THERE ARE SOME EVEN BIBLICAL GROUNDS 26:42 FOR DIVORCE. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE? 26:46 THERE ARE TWO REASONS THAT ARE REALLY GIVEN IN THE BIBLE WHEN 26:50 IT'S APPROPRIATE TO DIVORCE - AND NOT JUST DIVORCE, BECAUSE 26:54 YOU CAN SEPARATE, YOU KNOW, IF THERE'S ABUSE IN THE MARRIAGE 26:56 YOU SHOULD SEPARATE. 26:58 BUT TO DIVORCE, OFTEN PEOPLE ARE THINKING DIVORCE IS DESIGNED TO 27:03 PUT THEM BACK ON THE MARKET SO THEY CAN REMARRY. 27:06 ONE IS FOR THE CAUSE OF FORNICATION, JESUS SAID. 27:10 IF ONE SPOUSE OR THE OTHER VIOLATES THOSE SACRED VOWS AND 27:17 COMMITS THAT INTIMATE ACT WITH ANOTHER PERSON, THEY BIBLICALLY 27:22 HAVE GROUNDS - THEY HAVE BROKEN THE COVENANT - THEY HAVE GROUNDS 27:26 TO DIVORCE AND THEN TO REMARRY. IT DOESN'T MEAN THEY HAVE TO. 27:32 NOWHERE IS JESUS SAYING YOU HAVE TO DIVORCE. 27:34 RECONCILIATION IS ALWAYS MUCH BETTER. 27:37 AND LET ME ASK YOU, DOES THE BIBLE SOMETIMES USE THE 27:40 EXPRESSION THAT THE LORD IS OUR HUSBAND THE CHURCH IS THE BRIDE? 27:45 DOES GOD SAY THAT SOMETIMES HIS PEOPLE, WHETHER IT WAS ISRAEL OR 27:49 THE CHURCH, HAS PLAYED THE HARLOT AND COMMITTED ADULTERY? 27:53 DOES THE LORD FORGIVE - READ THE BOOK OF HOSEA - AND TAKE HER 27:56 BACK? IF THERE HAS BEEN INFIDELITY, 27:58 IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO GET DIVORCED. AND I TOLD YOU, THERE 28:02 ARE TWO REASONS. IN 1 CORINTHIANS CHAPTER 7 28:04 ANOTHER EXAMPLE IS GIVEN. AND PAUL IS TALKING TO PAGANS. 28:09 THERE WERE PEOPLE OUT THERE THEY WORSHIPED THE GRECO-ROMAN ARRAY 28:13 OF GODS AND ONE OF THEM ACCEPTS JESUS. LET'S SUPPOSE THE WIFE 28:17 THEN ACCEPTS JESUS. AND THE HUSBAND SAYS, 'I DIDN'T SIGN UP 28:21 FOR THIS. I DON'T WANT TO BE A CHRISTIAN. 28:23 I DON'T WANT TO FOLLOW YOUR LAWS. 28:25 I'M LEAVING.' IF THAT HUSBAND ABANDONS THE WIFE BECAUSE SHE 28:29 HAS ACCEPTED JESUS - THEY BOTH GOT MARRIED AS PAGANS - THEN, 28:33 PAUL SAYS, SHE IS FREE IN THAT REGARD - LET HIM DEPART. 28:38 BUT HE SAYS IF YOUR HUSBAND IS WILLING TO STAY MARRIED, STAY 28:41 MARRIED THAT THE HUSBAND MIGHT BE CONVERTED BY THE BEHAVIOR AND 28:44 CONVERSATION OF THE WIFE OR VICE VERSA. 28:48 BUT THAT WAS SORT OF A SECOND CLAUSE WHERE PAUL SAID, 'IN THE 28:51 EVENT THAT YOU'VE GOT TWO PAGANS THAT ONE OF THEM CONVERTS AND 28:54 THE PAGAN SPOUSE SAYS, 'WELL, I'M LEAVING.' 28:57 DOES THAT MEAN, NOW, THAT THE PERSON WHO IS 28:58 NEWLY CONVERTED CAN NEVER REMARRY? NO. 29:02 PAUL SAYS THEY ARE NOT UNDER BONDAGE IN SUCH CASES. 29:05 SO I JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT WAS A 29:07 SPECIFIC SCENARIO THAT PAUL WAS TALKING ABOUT THERE. 29:12 IF PEOPLE MARRY AND DIVORCE, IS THAT THE UNPARDONABLE SIN? 29:18 YOU REMEMBER THE STORY ABOUT DAVID AND BATHSHEBA? 29:22 NOW THAT WASN'T JUST ADULTERY THAT WAS MURDER. 29:27 WHICH, BY THE WAY, IS WORSE THAN DIVORCE, IN CASE YOU'RE 29:29 WONDERING. THE REASON I SAY THAT - YOU KNOW 29:33 HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE MURDERED BECAUSE SOMEBODY IS WANTING 29:37 TO GET OUT OF A MARRIAGE? AND I'VE OFTEN THOUGHT, 'WELL, 29:40 JUST DIVORCE THEM, DON'T...' THERE ARE WOMEN WHO HAVE 29:44 MURDERED THEIR HUSBANDS BECAUSE THEY WANTED OUT OF THE MARRIAGE 29:46 AND THEY SIGNED THEM UP FOR LIFE INSURANCE IN ADVANCE. 29:49 AND WE'VE ALL HEARD STORIES ABOUT HUSBANDS THAT MURDER THEIR 29:51 WIVES AND TRY TO COVER IT UP BECAUSE THEY WANTED OUT OF THE 29:53 MARRIAGE OR THEY HAD SOMEONE ELSE THEY WERE INTERESTED IN. 29:56 THAT'S CRAZY. MURDER'S MUCH WORSE. 30:00 SO - WHAT WAS I SAYING? OH, DAVID! 30:05 I WAS TALKING ABOUT DAVID BEFORE I (LAUGHTER) AND IF YOUR SPOUSE 30:09 GETS SENILE, STAY WITH THEM. THEY NEED YOU. 30:11 (LAUGHTER) DAVID - HE COMMITTED MURDER - COMMITTED ADULTERY AND 30:19 THEY SUFFERED TERRIBLY FOR THAT SIN AND HE REPENTED THOROUGHLY 30:25 FROM THAT SIN. YOU READ PSALM 32 - READ PSALM 30:27 51 - HE SPENT DAYS ON HIS FACE - LOST A CHILD TO DEATH. 30:32 PART OF THE JUDGMENT - LOST, ACTUALLY, FOUR CHILDREN IN TOTAL 30:34 BECAUSE OF THAT SIN - IT WAS A TERRIBLE SIN - BROUGHT GREAT 30:38 SHAME ON THE CAUSE OF GOD. DAVID WAS FORGIVEN. 30:42 WHAT DO YOU DO NOW? URIAH'S DEAD. DAVID'S WITH BATHSHEBA. 30:47 FIRST DAVID IS JUDGED AND GOD SAID, 'BECAUSE YOU HAVE TAKEN 30:51 URIAH'S WIFE' - BATHSHEBA, THE WIFE OF URIAH - AFTER DAVID 30:56 REPENTED IT SAYS, 'DAVID COMFORTED HIS WIFE, BATHSHEBA.' 31:01 SHE REMAINED HIS WIFE. 31:04 YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES YOU CANNOT UNSCRAMBLE SCRAMBLED EGGS. 31:08 PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES - THEY DIVORCE AND REMARRY AND THEY GET 31:10 OUT IN THE WORLD AND THEN THEY GO THROUGH A GENUINE CONVERSION 31:13 EXPERIENCE AND THEY - CAN THEY COME BACK TO THE LORD AND BE 31:16 FORGIVEN? YES, IT DOESN'T MEAN THINGS ARE 31:19 ALWAYS GOING TO BE THE SAME, BUT YES, THERE IS - IT'S NOT 31:22 THE UNPARDONABLE SIN. WHAT ABOUT THAT SAMARITAN WOMAN? 31:25 YOU REMEMBER WHAT JESUS SAID? 'GO CALL YOUR HUSBAND.' SHE 31:28 SAID, 'I DON'T HAVE A HUSBAND.' HE SAID, 'AHA, YOU'RE RIGHT. 31:30 YOU DON'T HAVE A HUSBAND, YOU'VE HAD FIVE HUSBANDS. 31:33 AND THE ONE THAT YOU HAVE NOW, YOU'RE NOT EVEN MARRIED TO.' 31:36 DID JESUS FORGIVE HER? >>YES. 31:39 >>DID HE REVEAL TO HER THAT HE WAS THE MESSIAH? 31:42 >>YES. >>DID HE USE HER TO BRING 31:44 THE MESSAGE TO OTHERS? AND SO GOD IS MERCIFUL. 31:49 SO I ALWAYS, AS A PASTOR, WE TRY TO STRIKE A BALANCE BETWEEN 31:52 EXPLAINING THAT MARRIAGE IS SACRED, IT'S A COVENANT, YOU 31:55 NEED TO STICK WITH IT AND, AT THE SAME TIME, LET PEOPLE KNOW, 31:59 BECAUSE IT IS EPIDEMIC, IT'S NOT THE UNPARDONABLE SIN AND THERE 32:02 IS REDEMPTION. AND SO I HOPE - I HOPE I'M ABLE 32:05 TO CONVEY THOSE TWO THEMES. SHAKESPEARE SAID, 'KNIT YOUR 32:10 HEARTS WITH AN UNSLIPPING KNOT' - SPEAKING ABOUT MARRIAGE. 32:14 I'D LIKE TO ENCOURAGE YOU. IN SPITE OF ALL THE DIVORCES IN 32:17 OUR CULTURE, SOME PEOPLE DO VERY WELL. 32:19 SOME PEOPLE HAVE LONG AND HAPPY MARRIAGES. 32:22 MY GRANDPARENTS GOT MARRIED WHEN MY GRANDMA WAS 16 YEARS OLD AND 32:27 SHE USED TO - YOU ASK HER, SHE'D SAY, 'WE DIDN'T LOVE EACH 32:31 OTHER.' SHE SAID, 'I JUST MARRIED HIM BECAUSE I WANTED TO 32:34 GET OUT OF THE HOUSE AND HE COULD SING.' (LAUGHTER) MY 32:36 GRANDFATHER, HE HAD A - HE WAS A JEWISH CANTOR - HE HAD A GREAT 32:38 SINGING VOICE. AND - YOU EVER HEARD OF THE GONG SHOW ? 32:42 ANY OF YOU REMEMBER THE TV PROGRAM CALLED THE GONG SHOW ? 32:45 MY GRANDFATHER SANG ON THE GONG SHOW AND HE WON. 32:48 AND IF YOU EVER CAME TO VISIT HIM, FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE, 32:51 HE WOULD SHOW YOU THE VIDEOTAPE OF HIM WINNING. 32:54 I HOPE I GET A COPY OF THAT. BUT SHE SAID, 'OH, WE DIDN'T 32:58 LOVE EACH OTHER.' AND I SAW MY GRANDPARENTS FIGHT. 33:02 I SAW MY GRANDMA CHASING MY GRANDFATHER. 33:04 I USED TO ALWAYS HEAR THEM YELL - SHE'D SAY, 'YOU PUT KETCHUP ON 33:06 EVERYTHING I COOK! WHY DO I BOTHER?' 33:08 AND JUST YOU HEARD ALL THESE ARGUMENTS - THEY REALLY DID 33:12 ARGUE QUITE A BIT. SHE'D YELL AT HIM, 33:14 'BUTTON YOUR PANTS! PUT YOUR TEETH IN!' 33:16 (LAUGHTER) THEY WERE MARRIED 72 YEARS. 33:25 I NEEDED THAT BECAUSE MY MOTHER WAS MARRIED FIVE TIMES AND MY 33:30 FATHER WAS MARRIED FIVE TIMES AND MY MOTHER MARRIED - LIVED 33:32 WITH A MARRIED MAN FOR 20 YEARS WHILE I WAS GROWING UP. 33:36 AND I USED TO HAVE TO PRETEND I DIDN'T KNOW HIS WIFE. 33:40 AND SO, WITH THAT KIND OF BACKGROUND - MOM AND DAD - 33:43 I NEEDED GRANDMA AND GRANDPA. 33:45 IN SPITE OF ALL THEIR PROBLEMS THEY STUCK IT OUT. 33:49 I KNOW KAREN'S GRANDPARENTS - ED'S FOLKS - VERY TOUCHING - 33:53 MARRIED - HOW LONG WERE THEY MARRIED? 33:55 >>I THOUGHT 65 - 75. >>HOW MANY YEARS - 75 YEARS? 34:02 OH, IT WAS MORE THAN 65 YEARS - HE WAS A HUNDRED YEARS OLD. 34:05 YEAH, LIKE 75 YEARS. BUT THEY WERE ALWAYS AFRAID THAT 34:09 ONE WOULD GO BEFORE THE OTHER. THEY BOTH DIED WITHIN TWO HOURS 34:12 OF EACH OTHER IN THE SAME ROOM. >>AWWW. 34:15 >>AND I WAS READING - WANTING TO KNOW WHO'S BEEN MARRIED THE 34:19 LONGEST. THERE'S THIS COUPLE - I THINK 34:22 THEY'RE STILL ALIVE - IN ENGLAND. 34:24 YOU KNOW, ONCE YOU GET OVER A HUNDRED YOU'VE GOT TO KEEP 34:26 CHECKING YOUR FACTS. THEY MARRIED IN BRADFORD, 34:31 ENGLAND - TIED THE KNOT IN 1925. THEY'RE DEFINITELY THE LONGEST 34:37 MARRIED COUPLE IN ENGLAND, PROBABLY THE WORLD. 34:40 HIS NAME IS KARAM CHAND, BORN IN A RURAL VILLAGE IN PUNJAB IN 34:44 NORTHERN INDIA IN 1905 AND THEY HAD A VERY SIMPLE SIKH WEDDING 34:50 AND THEY MARRIED YOUNG. SHE, I THINK, WAS 12 34:53 WHEN THEY MARRIED. NOW HE'S 108 AND SHE'S 101 AND 34:57 THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED 89 YEARS AND, EVIDENTLY, THEY'RE HAPPY. 35:03 BY THE WAY, THEY ALSO TALK ABOUT HEALTH AND SAY THEY EAT SIMPLY 35:06 NATURAL FOODS. SO, MARRIAGE HAS TO BE A COVENANT 35:12 WHERE YOU STICK WITH THE PERSON IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH. 35:17 I REMEMBER HEARING ABOUT THIS LADY THAT WAS AT HER HUSBAND'S 35:20 BEDSIDE IN THE HOSPITAL AS HE WAS KIND OF SLIPPING IN AND OUT 35:22 OF A COMA DURING WHAT WAS TO BE HIS FINAL ILLNESS. 35:27 AND DURING ONE OF HIS LUCID MOMENTS SHE WAS AT HIS SIDE AND 35:33 HE SAID, 'HONEY,' - SHE DREW CLOSE WHILE HE WAS TALKING - HE 35:36 SAID, 'I REMEMBER, YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN AT MY SIDE.' AND HE SAID, 35:41 'WHEN I LOST MY JOB, YOU WERE THERE. 35:45 WHEN THE BUSINESS FAILED, THERE YOU WERE.' HE SAID, 'WHEN I 35:49 BROKE MY LEG, YOU WERE THERE.' HE SAID, 'WHEN I GOT SICK, YOU 35:54 WERE THERE.' HE SAID, 'YOU KNOW, DEAR, I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU 35:59 I'VE REALIZED SOMETHING.' SHE DREW CLOSE AND HER EYES WERE ALL 36:01 MISTY. HE SAID, 'I THINK YOU'RE BAD LUCK.' (LAUGHTER) 36:06 >>OH, SO BAD! THAT'S SO BAD. >>OH COME ON. THE GUYS THINK 36:14 IT'S FUNNY. (LAUGHTER) THIS IS AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY SERMON. 36:20 (LAUGHTER) NOW THAT WAS JUST THE FIRST POINT. IT'S A COVENANT. 36:24 POINT 2) ESTABLISH YOUR OWN PRIVATE HOME. 36:28 I'LL READ IT TO YOU AGAIN - GENESIS 2:24, "THEREFORE A MAN 36:32 SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND CLEAVE" - IT'S CALLED 36:35 'LEAVE AND CLEAVE' - AND THAT WORD 'CLEAVE' IT, ACTUALLY, DOES 36:39 COME FROM THAT - AN ANCIENT JEWISH WORD WHERE THEY MADE GLUE 36:42 OUT OF HORSE HOOVES OR SHEEP HOOVES AND IT WAS GLUE. 36:45 IT MEANS BE ATTACHED. IT SAYS YOU'RE TO LEAVE. 36:49 IT'S IMPORTANT TO ESTABLISH YOUR OWN HOME. 36:52 IF YOU HAVE TOO MUCH OF THE IN-LAWS AND THE OUTLAWS ALL 36:57 THERE WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO ESTABLISH YOUR FAMILY - FIRST 37:00 COUPLE YEARS ARE TOUGH AND YOU NEED TO HAVE SOME PRIVACY 37:05 BECAUSE YOU'RE TAKING YOUR WHOLE SCENARIO OF WHAT LIFE'S ABOUT 37:09 AND ALL YOUR EXPERIENCES AND YOUR EXPECTATIONS AND YOU'RE 37:12 BRINGING THEM TO THE MARRIAGE AND THEN YOUR WIFE IS TAKING HER 37:15 EXPERIENCE AND BRINGING IT TO THE MARRIAGE. 37:17 AND KAREN AND I KNEW WE WERE GOING TO HAVE SOME CHALLENGES 37:19 BECAUSE KAREN WENT TO THE SAME SCHOOL 12 YEARS AND THEN WENT TO 37:23 CHRISTIAN COLLEGE. I WENT TO 14 DIFFERENT SCHOOLS. SHE GREW UP 37:27 IN A CHRISTIAN FAMILY. I GREW UP IN A PAGAN FAMILY. 37:31 AND JUST THE WAY YOU THINK AND YOU COMMUNICATE AND YOUR 37:34 EXPECTATIONS - WE KNEW THERE WERE GOING TO BE DIFFERENCES. 37:38 AND IT'S IMPORTANT THAT YOU'RE ABLE TO BRING THOSE THINGS 37:40 TOGETHER SO THAT YOU CAN COALESCE YOUR LIVES WITHOUT 37:44 OUTSIDE INTERFERENCE. 37:46 AND IF THERE ARE THIRD AND FOURTH PARTIES IN THE HOME - AND 37:49 I REALIZE SOMETIMES, IN SOME CULTURES, IT BECOMES - IT CAN 37:53 BECOME DIFFICULT, BUT GOD SAID, 'A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER 37:56 AND MOTHER AND CLEAVE UNTO HIS WIFE.' THE OTHER THING IS, IF A 38:00 MAN HAS HIS FATHER AND MOTHER LIVING IN THE HOUSE, HE'S ALWAYS 38:02 COMPARING HIS MOTHER'S COOKING TO HIS WIFE'S COOKING AND THAT 38:05 MAY NOT BE GOOD FOR HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE OR THE 38:08 OTHER. ESTABLISH YOUR OWN HOME. 38:11 DON'T LET THIRD PARTIES COME BETWEEN. 38:15 SPOUSE SHOULD BE THE BEST FRIEND. 38:18 SOMEONE ONCE SAID THAT MARRIAGE RESEMBLES A PAIR OF SCISSORS. 38:22 THEY'RE JOINED SO THEY CAN'T BE SEPARATED - OFTEN MOVING IN 38:25 OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS, BUT PUNISHING ANYONE THAT COMES 38:28 BETWEEN THEM. (LAUGHTER) WHEN I WAS PASTORING 38:33 ONE TIME, I HAD THIS COUPLE LIVING NEXT DOOR. 38:36 WE WERE GIVING THEM BIBLE STUDIES. 38:37 THEY STRUGGLED WITH DRINKING. 38:39 ONE DAY, A YOUNG GIRL CAME POUNDING ON OUR DOOR AND SAID, 38:42 'MY FATHER IS KILLING MY MOTHER!' 38:45 AND SO I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO BUT I WENT OVER AND I STOOD AT 38:49 THE DOOR AND I'M KIND OF KNOCKING AT THE DOOR AND I'M 38:54 HEARING THINGS BANGING AND LAMPS FALLING OVER AND CRASHING AND 38:57 YELLING AND SCREAMING INSIDE AND I THOUGHT, 'WELL, THIS ISN'T 38:59 GOING TO WORK.' AND SO WITHOUT THEM OPENING THE 39:01 DOOR, I JUST WENT INTO THEIR HOUSE. 39:02 IT FEELS REALLY STRANGE DOING THAT, YOU KNOW? 39:04 I THOUGHT, 'I'M STUDYING WITH PEOPLE. 39:05 I DON'T WANT TO CALL THE POLICE ON THEM.' 39:08 SO I JUST WENT IN. AND SO IT WASN'T LONG BEFORE I COULD TRACK 39:11 WHERE ALL THE COMMOTION WAS COMING FROM. 39:13 WENT OFF AND THEY'RE BACK IN THE BEDROOM AND THEY'RE - SHE'S 39:15 COWERING IN THE CORNER AND HE'S RANTING - HE'S BEEN DRINKING - 39:18 AND HE'S RANTING AT HER AND SHE'S SCREAMING AT HIM AND, 39:25 'OH, YOU BROUGHT THE PREACHER IN HERE TO HELP YOU' - 39:27 AND JUST STUFF LIKE THAT AND THEN HE STARTED TRYING TO THROW 39:32 SOMETHING AND I GOT BETWEEN THEM AND THE NEXT THING I KNEW, 39:34 SHE SAW THAT SHE HAD SOME PROTECTION FROM ME AND SHE 39:36 GOT UP AND SHE STARTED GOING AFTER HIM AND PRETTY SOON I 39:39 WAS BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM. >>UH OH. 39:41 >>AND I STARTED WRESTLING WITH HIM AND - I KNOW I'M SMALL, BUT 39:46 I HAD A GOLD MEDAL IN WRESTLING IN MILITARY SCHOOL. 39:48 I WAS PRETTY GOOD. AND SO I GOT THE GUY IN A LOCK 39:52 AND HE COULDN'T DO ANYTHING - SHE STARTED FEELING SORRY FOR 39:54 HER HUSBAND AND STARTED WAILING ON ME. 39:56 (LAUGHTER) THEY WERE KILLING EACH OTHER, BUT WHEN ANYONE CAME 40:05 BETWEEN THEM, YOU BETTER GET OUT OF THE WAY. 40:09 AND SO I'VE SEEN THAT. NO, I'M NOT RECOMMENDING 40:11 WHAT I JUST SAID THERE. I'M JUST TELLING YOU I'VE SEEN 40:14 IT BEFORE THAT THERE'S A BOND IN MARRIAGE THAT EVEN WHEN SOMEONE 40:17 COMES BETWEEN THEM AND THEY'RE HURTING EACH OTHER, THAT 40:20 SUDDENLY SHE BECAME VERY DEFENSIVE ABOUT HER HUSBAND. 40:24 SO YOU NEED TO ESTABLISH YOUR OWN FAMILY. POINT NUMBER 3 IN A 40:28 MARRIAGE: IT SAYS ABOVE ALL THINGS, CONTINUE YOUR COURTSHIP. 40:35 WHAT BROUGHT YOU TOGETHER IN THE FIRST PLACE NEEDS TO GO ON. 40:39 1 PETER 4:8, "ABOVE ALL THINGS HAVE - BE UNFAILING IN YOUR LOVE 40:44 FOR ONE ANOTHER, FOR 'LOVE WILL COVER A MULTITUDE OF SINS.'" 40:48 YOU KNOW WHERE JESUS SAYS IN REVELATION, 'NEVERTHELESS, I 40:51 HAVE THIS AGAINST YOU BECAUSE' - WHAT? 40:53 'YOU'VE LOST YOUR FIRST LOVE.' AND HOW MANY TIMES HAVE PEOPLE 40:57 THOUGHT, 'WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS I THINKING? I LOVED THIS PERSON. 41:01 WHERE'D THAT LOVE GO? WE FELL OUT OF LOVE. 41:04 WE DRIFTED APART.' WELL, THE THINGS THAT BROUGHT YOU TOGETHER 41:07 IN THE FIRST PLACE, MUST BE CONTINUALLY NURTURED AND FED AND 41:13 ENCOURAGED AND REVIVED. SOMEONE SAID MARRIAGE IS LIKE 41:17 RUNNING A FARM. YOU'VE GOT TO START OVER EVERY DAY. 41:19 (LAUGHTER) AND, YOU DON'T REALLY GET A DAY OFF. 41:23 EVERY DAY YOU NEED TO NURTURE IT. 41:25 EVERY DAY THE COWS NEED MILKING. EVERY DAY - I MEAN, IF YOU HAVE 41:28 A FARM YOU DON'T EVEN STOP THAT ON SABBATH, DO YOU? 41:31 AND SO EVERY DAY THERE NEEDS TO BE THINGS THAT NURTURE THAT 41:36 FIRST LOVE. PROVERBS 31:28, "...HER HUSBAND 41:40 ALSO, AND HE PRAISES HER:" YOU NOTICE THAT'S AN ONGOING VERB? 41:45 YOU CONTINUE TO ENCOURAGE AND TO PRAISE. 41:47 WE NEED THOSE THINGS. WE APPRECIATE IT. 41:50 1 CORINTHIANS 7:34, "...SHE WHO IS MARRIED CARES ABOUT... 41:54 HOW SHE MAY PLEASE HER HUSBAND." 41:57 AND SO, IT'S AN ONGOING CONCERN - PRAISE, CARING ABOUT PLEASING 42:02 THIS PERSON - WHEN YOU START TAKING THE PERSON FOR GRANTED 42:05 THEN YOU HAVE A LOT OF PROBLEMS. 42:07 YOU NEED TO SHOW AFFECTION AND IT NEEDS TO BE CONSCIOUS. 42:12 YOU MIGHT SAY, 'WELL, I DON'T FEEL LOVE.' DO IT ANYWAY AND 42:14 YOU'LL BE SURPRISED, YOU MIGHT START FEELING THE LOVE AGAIN. 42:17 'DO THE FIRST WORKS' JESUS SAID, 'REMEMBER FROM WHERE YOU HAVE 42:21 FALLEN. REPENT AND DO THE FIRST WORKS.' 42:23 ROMANS 12, VERSE 10, "BE KINDLY AFFECTIONATE TO ONE ANOTHER 42:27 WITH BROTHERLY LOVE, IN HONOR PREFERRING ONE ANOTHER." 42:31 BILLY SUNDAY SAID, 'TRY PRAISING YOUR WIFE, EVEN IF IT DOES 42:33 FRIGHTEN HER AT FIRST.' (LAUGHTER) AND YOU'VE HEARD THE 42:38 EXPRESSION BEFORE, 'TREAT HER LIKE A QUEEN AND SHE WILL TREAT 42:40 YOU LIKE A KING.' AND SOMETIMES YOU WILL GET, FROM THE OTHER 42:44 PERSON, WHAT YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN WANTING TO GET, WHEN YOU TREAT 42:47 THEM THE WAY THAT THEY'RE LONGING TO BE TREATED. 42:51 AND SO, IT'S THROUGH THE COOPERATIVE NURTURING OF EACH 42:55 OTHER IN THE RELATIONSHIP. DON'T OVERLOOK THE LITTLE 42:58 COURTESIES, ENCOURAGEMENTS, AND AFFECTIONATE ACTS. 43:03 SURPRISE EACH OTHER WITH LITTLE THINGS - GIFTS AND FAVORS. 43:05 I'VE GOT TO THINK ABOUT THAT BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS SO WORK 43:07 ORIENTED. YOU KNOW, NATHAN JUST RECENTLY 43:09 WENT TO - HE WENT TO COLLEGE, YEAH - AND WE WERE 43:14 EXPERIENCING EMPTY NEST. KAREN DROVE HIM BACK AND I KNEW 43:17 IT WAS GOING TO BE TOUGH FOR HER TO, YOU KNOW, WAVE GOOD BYE. 43:21 I WAS ACTUALLY WITH SOME OF YOU ON THE MISSION TRIP WHEN KAREN 43:23 WAS DROPPING NATHAN OFF AND SHE HAD TO COME BACK AND I THOUGHT, 43:28 YOU KNOW, IT COULD BE TOUGH FOR HER. STEPHEN'S AT COLLEGE, 43:32 NATHAN'S AT COLLEGE - SHE'S GOING TO HAVE TO COME HOME AND 43:34 LIVE WITH ME. (LAUGHTER) 43:36 SO I WENT OUT AND I GOT A CARD AND I GOT SOME 43:38 FLOWERS AND I WROTE HER A LITTLE NOTE AND I SAID, YOU KNOW, 'IF 43:41 YOU'RE LOOKING FOR ANYONE TO BABY, I'LL LET YOU BABY ME.' 43:44 (LAUGHTER) WASN'T THAT CONSIDERATE OF ME TO DO THAT? 43:48 (LAUGHTER) SHE MUST HAVE CARED BECAUSE SHE'S STILL GOT THAT 43:51 CARD ON THE DESK. SHE STARES AT IT FOR AWHILE 43:55 BUT - WHEN A GUY DOES A LITTLE THOUGHTFUL THING LIKE THAT, YOU 43:59 NEED TO MILK IT FOR ALL THE CREDIT YOU CAN GET BECAUSE 44:02 THEY DON'T HAPPEN THAT OFTEN. SO THERE NEEDS TO BE THE 44:09 CONTINUED COURTSHIP THAT GOES ON. 44:13 DON'T TAKE EACH OTHER FOR GRANTED. 44:15 WHAT YOU DID WHEN YOU COURTED EACH OTHER, THE EXCITEMENT, THE 44:17 LOVE - YOU NEED TO HAVE DATE NIGHTS WHERE YOU GO OUT AND YOU 44:20 DO THINGS TOGETHER. AND THEN, MAYBE I'LL PAUSE WITH 44:24 THIS THOUGHT - AFTER I'LL DO POINT NUMBER 4 AND WE'LL TAKE 44:27 IT UP WHEN WE BEGIN NEXT TIME - GUARD YOUR THOUGHTS. 44:32 DON'T LET YOUR SENSES TRAP YOU. NOW YOU'D BE SURPRISED HOW MANY 44:35 MARRIAGES ARE DESTROYED BECAUSE OF BAD THINKING. 44:39 PROVERBS 23, VERSE 7, "FOR AS HE THINKS IN HIS HEART, SO IS HE." 44:46 A LOT OF ADULTERIES BEGIN WITH THOUGHTS. YOU KNOW ONE OF THE 44:50 NUMBER ONE THINGS THAT CONTRIBUTES TO DIVORCE? 44:54 IT MAY NOT BE THE ACT OF ADULTERY, BUT IT'S MENTAL 44:57 ADULTERY THAT'S HAPPENING EITHER THROUGH PORNOGRAPHY ON THE 45:01 INTERNET OR SOAP OPERAS ON TELEVISION. 45:06 AND I'M NOT SAYING THEY'RE EXACTLY THE SAME THING BUT, YOU 45:10 KNOW, WHEN EVERY DAY A WIFE - OR A HUSBAND - IT'S NOT TYPICALLY 45:16 THE HUSBAND - IS WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE VICARIOUSLY HAVING 45:21 AFFAIRS, THEN YOU'RE REJOICING IN THOSE THAT DO IT. 45:27 IT'S SOMETHING THAT'S HAPPENING IN THE THINKING AND WHAT'S 45:29 HAPPENING IS PEOPLE LOOKING AT THESE UNREAL IMAGES ON THE 45:34 INTERNET, ON TV, ON THEIR COMPUTER OR TELEVISION PROGRAMS 45:40 THAT ARE GIVING A COUNTERFEIT HOLLYWOOD VERSION OF WHAT 45:43 MARRIAGE IS SUPPOSED TO BE AND TOTALLY UNREALISTIC, SAPPY LOVE 45:47 STORIES THAT ARE SO FAR-FETCHED FROM ANY REAL LIFE, THAT PEOPLE 45:53 CAN START TO BE DISSATISFIED AND THINK - YEAH, THEY GOT SOME 45:57 DEBONAIR ACTOR THAT'S JUST - OH, HE'S THE MOST THOUGHTFUL GUY 45:59 IN THE WORLD AND HE'S DOING ALL THESE THINGS. HE'S SO ROMANTIC 46:01 AND HE'S GOT LOTS OF MONEY AND FANCY CARS AND HE ALWAYS LOOKS 46:04 BUFF AND WORKING OUT AND HE'S JUST - EVERY HAIR'S IN PLACE AND 46:10 - HOW CAN YOU COMPETE WITH THAT? AND THEN SHE - AND YOU COME HOME 46:15 FROM WORK AND SHE LOOKS AT YOU AND GOES, 'OH BROTHER. 46:20 HE DOESN'T LOOK ANYTHING LIKE THAT GUY!' (LAUGHTER) 46:24 AND SO, IN THE MIND THE LADY OR THE GUY - GUYS ARE LOOKING AT 46:29 THESE GIRLS THAT HAVE GOT THESE PERFECT BODIES - AIRBRUSHED - 46:32 PHOTOSHOPPED - AND THEN THEY SEE, YOU KNOW, A COUPLE OF 46:36 WRINKLES AND A LITTLE CELLULITE AND THEY START THINKING - AND 46:42 THINGS START HAPPENING IN THE MIND. 46:44 NOW WE'RE KIND OF LAUGHING BECAUSE WE KNOW IT'S TRUE, BUT 46:48 TELEVISION HAS CONTRIBUTED A GREAT DEAL TO DESTROYING 46:56 MARRIAGES. TURN OFF THE TV. 47:01 IN AN ARTICLE BY DR. ARMAND NICHOLI, WHO IS A PSYCHIATRIST 47:05 AND A MEDICAL DOCTOR ON THE FACILITY OF HARVARD MEDICAL 47:08 SCHOOL, HE SAID, "ANOTHER TREND THAT IS GOING TO DESTROY THE 47:12 FAMILY AS WE KNOW IT AND CAUSE EMOTIONAL CRIPPLES IS THE 47:17 INVASION OF THE TELEVISION INTO THE HOME." 47:19 ONE FIFTH OF THE LIFETIME IN THE NEXT GENERATION WILL BE SPENT 47:23 WATCHING TELEVISION. IF YOU LIVE TO BE 80 YEARS OF 47:26 AGE, WHICH IS YOUR AVERAGE, YOU'LL HAVE WATCHED TELEVISION A 47:30 TOTAL OF 4,000 DAYS, CREATING A TREMENDOUS IMPACT. 47:34 AND SINCE WE KNOW THAT TELEVISION IS PART OF A SYSTEM 47:37 THAT TEARS DOWN THE FAMILY, YOU'LL HAVE A TOTAL OF 4,000 47:40 DAYS OF ANTI-FAMILY PROGRAMMING ON ONE LEVEL OR ANOTHER. 47:45 AND SO, EVERYTHING FROM WHAT WE READ TO WHAT WE WATCH AND WHAT'S 47:48 ON THE INTERNET, IT IS AFFECTING THE THINKING. 47:51 AND PEOPLE BRING THESE UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS INTO 47:55 REAL MARRIAGES. THEY BRING THESE UNREALISTIC 47:58 IMAGES INTO REAL MARRIAGES AND THEY ARE DISSATISFIED. 48:03 AND THEN THOUGHTS COME INTO THE MIND AND THEY START 48:05 HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS AND THEY START HAVING DOUBTS AND THEY 48:08 HAVE UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS AND THE IMPURITY IN THE MIND. 48:12 KEEP YOUR MIND - KEEP YOUR HEART - LET THE BIBLE AND THE WORD OF 48:17 GOD AND THE THINGS OF GOD BE THE CATALYST FOR YOUR FAMILY AND 48:22 YOU'LL FIND THAT THAT LOVE AND APPRECIATION FOR THAT PERSON 48:25 THAT GOD HAS FOR YOU - THAT YOU'VE BECOME ONE WITH THROUGH 48:29 MARRIAGE - WILL BE RESTORED AND REVIVED. 48:32 >>AMEN. >>A COUPLE WAS - THEY WERE 48:35 HAVING DAILY BICKERING - ARGUMENTS - OFTEN 48:38 OVER LITTLE THINGS. THEY REALIZED THAT EVERY DAY 48:41 THEY WERE AT EACH OTHER. AND THE WIFE CAME 48:44 UP WITH AN IDEA. SHE SAID, 'LOOK, YOU 48:45 KNOW, THIS IS SILLY. IT'S IMMATURE. 48:48 IF WE HAVE DIFFERENCES - IF THERE'S THINGS WE WANT TO 48:52 COMMUNICATE, LET'S GIVE EACH OTHER A BREAK. 48:54 IF THERE'S SOMETHING I'M DOING THAT'S BOTHERING YOU, WRITE IT 48:56 OUT ON A SLIP OF PAPER, PUT IT IN THIS BOX HERE ON THE KITCHEN 49:00 COUNTER. IF I'VE GOT SOMETHING, I'LL WRITE IT DOWN. 49:03 I'LL PUT IT ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER. 49:04 AT THE END OF A MONTH, THEN WE'LL TALK THROUGH IT. 49:07 WE'LL HAVE ONE BIG ARGUMENT AND GET IT OVER WITH.' SO HE SAID, 49:11 'OKAY DEAR.' SO EACH DAY SHE'D MAKE AN 49:14 OBSERVATION, SHE'D WRITE IT DOWN, SHE'D PUT IT IN THE 49:17 BOX, AND SHE WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHING. 49:19 HE'D WRITE SOMETHING DOWN, HE'D PUT IT IN THE BOX AND WOULDN'T 49:21 SAY ANYTHING. THIS WENT ON FOR 30 DAYS. 49:24 AT THE END OF 30 DAYS SHE SAID, 'OKAY, LET'S SIT DOWN. 49:27 LET'S OPEN THE BOX.' SHE TOOK OUT THE BOX AND 49:30 SHE PULLED OUT HER PINK PAPERS. 49:33 IT SAID, 'LEAVING THE LID OFF THE JELLY JAR AGAIN.' 'DIRTY 49:39 SOCKS ON THE FLOOR' AND SHE JUST WAS GOING THROUGH HER LITANY OF 49:43 JUST ALL THESE THINGS AND FINALLY SHE SAID, 'OKAY, YOU CAN 49:46 READ YOUR BLUE ONES NOW.' HIS SAID, 'I LOVE YOU.' 'I LOVE 49:52 YOU.' 'I LOVE YOU.' AND SHE BEGAN TO FEEL A LITTLE BAD. 50:00 THE THINGS - BY THE WAY, THAT STORY CAN BE TOLD EITHER WAY. 50:03 (LAUGHTER) LOVE COVERS A MULTITUDE OF SIN. 50:11 YOU KNOW, WE NATURALLY ARE NOT LOVABLE? 50:14 GOD DIDN'T DIE FOR US BECAUSE WE'RE LOVABLE. 50:17 IT'S EASY TO LOVE THE LOVABLE. WHILE WE WERE YET SINNERS, 50:20 CHRIST LOVED US AND DIED FOR US. >>AMEN. 50:23 >>AND IF THE LORD CAN LOVE US AND THE LOVE OF CHRIST CAN BE 50:28 SHED ABROAD IN OUR HEARTS - YOU KNOW WHAT - WHAT'S THE GREAT 50:31 COMMANDMENT IN THE LAW? 'LOVE THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR 50:34 HEART AND LOVE' - WHAT? >>YOUR NEIGHBOR. 50:36 >>LOVE WHO? YOUR NEIGHBOR. 50:39 WHO'S A CLOSER NEIGHBOR THAN YOUR SPOUSE? 50:43 IT'S INTERESTING, THE BIBLE SAYS YOU NEED TO LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR. 50:45 IT SAYS YOU NEED TO LOVE YOUR ENEMY. 50:47 SOMEONE BROUGHT OUT IT'S OFTEN BECAUSE YOUR NEIGHBOR BECOMES 50:49 YOUR ENEMY. AND IF WE CAN'T LOVE OUR 50:54 SPOUSES, HOW ARE WE GOING TO LOVE OUR ENEMIES? 50:57 HOW ARE WE GOING TO LOVE OUR NEIGHBORS? 50:59 THAT'S WHERE IT STARTS. AND IT'S A CHOICE 51:02 THAT NEEDS TO BE MADE. NOW THERE'S - THERE'S A RULE IN 51:05 LIFE - IT SAYS IT'S A SIMPLE RULE OF PHYSICS THAT THE CLOSER 51:09 THAT TWO OBJECTS COME TO A COMMON DESTINATION THEY WILL 51:13 INVARIABLY COME CLOSER TO ONE ANOTHER. 51:17 AND IF CHRIST IS AT THE MIDDLE OF YOUR LIFE - IF YOU, 51:20 PERSONALLY, HAVE SURRENDERED YOUR LIFE TO JESUS, THE CLOSER 51:23 YOU ARE COMING TO JESUS - AND IF YOUR SPOUSE IS COMING CLOSER TO 51:26 JESUS - YOU WILL INVARIABLY BE COMING CLOSER TOGETHER. 51:30 >>AMEN. >>GOD IS LOVE. 51:32 AND IF HE IS THE CENTER OF OUR LIVES HE WILL DRAW OUR HEARTS 51:36 TOGETHER AND OUR FAMILIES AND OUR MARRIAGES. 51:39 >>AMEN. >>DO NOT LET THE WORLD DEFINE 51:41 WHAT MARRIAGE IS FOR YOU. GOD HAS GIVEN US THE DEFINITION, 51:43 AMEN? AND OUR MARRIAGES ARE TO BE BASED ON THAT LOVE 51:47 RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD AND WITH EACH OTHER. 51:50 >>CAN'T GET ENOUGH AMAZING FACTS BIBLE STUDY? 51:53 YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT WEEK TO ENJOY MORE TRUTH- 51:56 FILLED PROGRAMMING, VISIT THE AMAZING FACTS MEDIA LIBRARY AT 52:00 'AFTV.ORG'. AT 'AFTV.ORG' YOU CAN ENJOY VIDEO AND AUDIO 52:07 PRESENTATIONS AS WELL AS PRINTED MATERIAL ALL FREE OF CHARGE, 52:11 24 HOURS A DAY 7 DAYS A WEEK, RIGHT FROM YOUR COMPUTER OR 52:15 MOBILE DEVICE. VISIT 'AFTV.ORG'. 52:20 >>WELL, MY CONVERSION STORY IS WHEN I WAS IN THE PHILIPPINES I 52:26 JUST GRADUATED AS A NURSE AND AFTERWARDS I DID NOT HAVE ANY 52:31 RELIGION AND ONE TIME I FOUND MYSELF INSIDE A SMALL CHURCH - 52:37 CATHOLIC CHURCH IN MANILLA AND BEFORE A BIG CROSS. 52:43 AND I WAS KNEELING BEFORE AND I COULD HEAR JESUS TELLING ME TO 52:49 ENTER THE CONVENT - SAVE MYSELF AND ALSO MY FAMILY. 52:54 AND I SAID, 'LORD, I WOULD LIKE TO FOLLOW YOU ALL THE WAY.' AT 52:57 THAT POINT, I SEEMED TO BE HAPPY EXTERNALLY BUT, BECAUSE INSIDE 53:02 THE CONVENT WE DON'T READ OUR BIBLE - WE DON'T STUDY ABOUT THE 53:06 WORD OF GOD. WE PRAY THE ROSARIES. 53:09 WE ALSO, AT THE SAME TIME, STUDY THE LIVES OF THE SAINTS AND ALSO 53:14 OUR FOUNDERS AND THE ENCYCLICALS OF THE POPE AND THE VIRGIN MARY. 53:20 AND SO I DO NOT KNOW THE TRUTH AND I HAD THIS TORTURE OF 53:23 CONSCIENCE - THE GUILTY FEELINGS THAT CANNOT BE RESOLVED. 53:28 SO I WOULD CONFESS TO THE PRIEST IN THE CONFESSIONAL BOX SAYING, 53:32 'FATHER FORGIVE ME. SINCE - MY LAST CONFESSION WAS 53:35 LAST WEEK - SINCE THEN I HAVE COMMITTED THE FOLLOWING SIN, 53:40 INCLUDING THE ROOT CAUSE - WHY AM I FALLING AND FALLING IN THAT 53:44 SAME SIN OVER AND OVER AGAIN?' AND STILL, FOR 21 LONG YEARS, 53:49 I STRUGGLE AND I STRUGGLE AND I STRUGGLE. 53:54 I REALIZED THAT I WAS TOTALLY EMPTY. 53:57 I WAS TOTALLY HELPLESS AND HOPELESS AND SO DEPRESSED AND SO 54:02 DESPERATE THAT I WOULD LIKE ALREADY TO END MY LIFE. 54:07 I WAS WORKING FOR FIVE YEARS AS DEAN OF THE UNIVERSITY OF SAINT 54:11 AUGUSTINE COLLEGE OF NURSING IN ILOILO CITY ON ONE OF THE 54:15 ISLANDS IN THE PHILIPPINES. AFTER FIVE YEARS I RECEIVE MY 54:21 COMMISSION FROM MY PARENTS TO HELP MY SISTER WHO IS 54:25 BEING A BATTERED WOMAN. THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS WHY I 54:30 CAME OVER TO UNITED STATES, IT IS BECAUSE MY SISTER 54:35 NEEDS MY HELP. AS I WAS WORKING IN THE HOSPITAL 54:38 IN NEW YORK, MY BOSS SERAPHIN, HE WAS SO GRACIOUS ENOUGH TO 54:43 GIVE ME AN INVITATION TO THE MILLENNIUM PROPHECY. 54:47 AS I WAS LISTENING TO PASTOR DOUG BATCHELOR'S PRESENTATION, 54:51 MY HEART REALLY WAS BEATING SO FAST AND MY MIND - I'M ABLE TO 54:56 GRASP THE TRUTH THAT THIS IS THE TRUTH THAT I'VE BEEN LONGING TO 55:02 HEAR ALL MY LIFE - THAT I'VE BEEN SEEKING FOR SO LONG. 55:08 MY PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS - I CAN SEE JESUS AS MY 55:12 PERSONAL SAVIOR. HE IS NOT ONLY THE SAVIOR OF 55:16 THE WHOLE WORLD, BUT HE IS MY PERSONAL SAVIOR. 55:20 HE WAS THE ONE WHO DELIVERED ME MIGHTILY FROM THE DEPTHS OF SIN 55:26 - FROM THE MIREY CLAY. PASTOR DOUG BATCHELOR HAS 55:30 BEEN USED BY THE LORD IN MY CONVERSION. 55:33 THE AMAZING FACTS I OWE TO THEM. 55:36 THE LORD REALLY BLESSED THIS MINISTRY AND I'M SO PROUD I WAS 55:42 ABLE TO ATTEND THIS MILLENNIUM PROPHECY. 55:45 MY LIFE HAS NEVER BEEN THE SAME. IT HAS GIVEN ME THAT PEACE - 55:50 THAT JOY THAT NEVER - I HAVE NEVER TASTED IN MY LIFE AND NOW 55:57 I'M SET FREE TO BE ABLE TO WORK FOR HIM AND TO FOLLOW HIM. 56:10 (MUSIC) 56:15 >>AMAZING FACTS BEGAN IN 1965 WITH A GOD-INSPIRED 56:20 CONCEPT. >>HELLO, THIS IS JOE CREWS AND 56:23 THE AMAZING FACTS BROADCAST FACTS WHICH AFFECT YOU . 56:26 >>EACH RADIO BROADCAST WOULD BEGIN WITH AN AMAZING FACT FROM 56:30 SCIENCE, NATURE, OR HISTORY, FOLLOWED BY A BIBLE MESSAGE THAT 56:34 TOUCHED THE HEARTS OF LISTENERS FROM EVERY WALK OF LIFE. 56:38 THE PROGRAM WAS AN INSTANT SUCCESS AND THE MINISTRY SOON 56:42 BEGAN EXPANDING TO INCLUDE BIBLE LESSONS. 56:45 IN 1986 AMAZING FACTS ADDED THE MEDIUM OF TELEVISION TO ITS 56:49 GROWING OUTREACH EFFORTS, OFFERING SOUL-WINNING 56:52 EVANGELISTIC MESSAGES FOR VIEWERS AROUND THE WORLD. 56:56 IN 1994, PASTOR DOUG BATCHELOR ASSUMED LEADERSHIP OF THE 57:00 MINISTRY, ADDING THE BIBLE ANSWERS LIVE CALL-IN RADIO 57:04 PROGRAM AND NEW MINISTRY TV PROGRAMS BEGAN AIRING ON 57:08 MULTIPLE NETWORKS AROUND THE WORLD. 57:11 FOR 50 YEARS, THE DRIVING VISION OF AMAZING FACTS HAS BEEN THE 57:15 BOLD PROCLAMATION OF THE EVERLASTING GOSPEL AND, WITH A 57:19 TEAM OF EVANGELISTS CIRCLING THE GLOBE, AND THOUSANDS OF MEN AND 57:23 WOMEN BEING TRAINED THROUGH THE AMAZING FACTS CENTER OF 57:26 EVANGELISM PROGRAM - AFCOE - THE MINISTRY IS HELPING GOD'S CHURCH 57:31 SEE A RICH HARVEST OF SOULS. 57:33 AMAZING FACTS: GOD'S MESSAGE, OUR MISSION. 57:43 >>IN SIX DAYS GOD CREATED THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH. 57:47 FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS MAN HAS WORSHIPED GOD ON THE SEVENTH DAY 57:51 OF THE WEEK. NOW, EACH WEEK, MILLIONS OF PEOPLE WORSHIP ON 57:54 THE FIRST DAY. WHAT HAPPENED? WHY DID GOD CREATE A DAY OF 57:58 REST? DOES IT REALLY MATTER WHAT DAY WE WORSHIP? WHO WAS BEHIND 58:03 THIS GREAT SHIFT? DISCOVER THE TRUTH BEHIND GOD'S LAW AND HOW 58:07 IT WAS CHANGED. VISIT SABBATHTRUTH.COM . 58:13 (MUSIC) |
Revised 2017-02-06