Welcome back, I love the
fact that Marcia talked so much
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about her rebellion and
what happened to her as far as
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how that started in a Sabbath
school class and it really
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blindsided her, she
thought everything was fine.
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I'm just doing class and
somebody says something about
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I think you are going to
be married to a Pastor and her
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self raised up
and she said no way.
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Don't even say that to me,
and I don't know where that
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came from but when you
start to deal with rebellion
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you will feel that come
up, you will feel that rise up.
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If you are questioning
right now whether that is your
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issue sit down quietly and
say Jesus, is that my issue?
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Do I have rebellion to look
at? Then let the Holy Spirit
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direct you, because one
of the things that was a real
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surprised at is the Holy
Spirit directed me to my own
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rebellion and when I asked
Him was that one of my issues?
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He showed me when I
was a little kid and
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that nobody heard me, nobody
paid attention and there was
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a time in my life that I
said as a little girl, that will
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not happen again. You will
hear me and I am going to be
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seen and all that stuff.
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Even with Greta when she
talked about self rising up
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as that self for me rose up
there was some things I had to
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look at fairness issues life is
not fair and it is not fair that
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I had to be raised with addicts.
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I am going to take care of
myself and nobody's going to
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hurt me anymore like that.
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And every single one of
those statements created in me
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this really rebellion,
this really defiant place.
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So if you ask God, God is that
me? Jesus do I really need to
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look at some
things? And what are they?
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What are they can be anywhere,
like mine was caused by pain.
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Marcia's, if I'm going to
guess was caused by somebody
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taking a dream that she
might have had and changing that
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dream off and her saying
that's not the dream I had.
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But something happens
and our rebellion kicks in.
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So if you are thinking
that you may have some of that
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stuff is too ask Jesus
what kicked in for you.
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Where did it start? To
close here we're going to talk
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about how to resolve that stuff.
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So one is ask God, because
God has known us since we were
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tiny. The Bible says when
you were in your mother's womb
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I formed you, so if anybody
is going to bring light onto
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our blind spots, on to
our rebellion, onto our anger
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issues, God is going to do
that through the Holy Spirit.
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I think as far as an
accountability partner, as far
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somebody they can walk
alongside of us, God is it.
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God is so good at it, He
is so gentle, so ask Him.
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Do I have rebellion
issues? What are they?
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Were they caused by pain?
Then if you are brave enough
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ask the people around
you because they will say
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are you kidding me?
You are asking me that?
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Of course you do that usually
the people around us know
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that we do have that edge to us.
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We do have fairness issues
that always get under our skin.
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We do I have anger to
deal with? And if you ask God
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where is the anger that I
have? Do I have that and where
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did that come from? Because
what is really amazing is
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that God says okay what are
you going to do with that anger?
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Marcia talked about surrendering
that to God, what an
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incredible stance to take.
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It is not the only do I
believe there is a God that
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cares about me and my recovery,
I believe there is a God
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that can free me from this
junk that I am tied up with.
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From this anger and
from this rebellion because
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I'm telling you I don't
know what you're rebellion looks
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like, but mine
looked bad, it looked bad.
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There was nothing good about
how I walked around in life.
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Because if you got under my
skin, if you said something that
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offended me I could drop
the relationship like that and
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go on to someone else.
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I could move away and do
all that stuff and not even know
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that all that
came from my rebellion.
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If you asked me to step
into recovery and I still have
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all of that junk stirring
up is that I will not be able
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to connect with
the people around me.
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So ask Him about your rebellion,
did it come from pain?
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Did it come from anger?
How can I then step into
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recovery? What can I
do next to resolve that?
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Deal with the fact that
if my rebellion came from the
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damage I had as a
child, can I forgive them?
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That is huge. Can I go to
every single relationship,
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we talked on another
program is that in different
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12-step groups, different
programs they will have
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you list all your resentments,
have you list all the
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people that have hurt you.
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Especially in the big book
and most 12-step groups will
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give you a whole column
and say list any institution or
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people that have
injured you in your life.
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That is where most of
our rebellion comes from and
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where most of
our anger comes from.
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So list them out and when
you get them listed out, say to
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yourself I forgive you for
hurting me in the way you did.
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Like for my mom, I
forgive you for not loving me.
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I forgive you for not
being there because of your
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addictions. I choose to
let that go, whatever ground
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I gave to the devil,
what ever I surrendered to him
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I am literally taking that
back and taking all the pain
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and the consequences and
the rebellion from that back and
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I'm going to surrender
that to God and ask you Jesus to
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take full control of
that and please change me.
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Teach me how to walk
through life without rebellion.
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Because for some of
us it is in our very DNA.
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You know what I mean, it is
so much of who we are that if
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you ask somebody who they
are without it they don't know.
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It motivates them
to get the job done.
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It motivates them
to walk through life.
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They literally can grab
somebody by the collar and say
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what you mean that
I don't belong here?
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That I didn't deserve this
promotion? It motivates them to
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do that and you start
healing from there and
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you don't really know how
to do that but as God how do
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I even do that?
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Another thing that we are
going to look at and this is
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awful, we are going to
look at, I was very, in my
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rebellion I ended up on
the streets at age 13 so
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I was homeless.
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I survived the streets
and there was a certain amount
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of pride in that.
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I was literally kidnapped
by bikers, punched in the face
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with my teeth knocked
out and I got up to punch
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them back each time.
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And you know there was a
part of me that says try to
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take me down, you
cannot take me down.
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There was this sense of
defiance, a sense of rebellion
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for sure, but there was a
pride that stepped into my life
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and it was really
there, I really protected that.
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So I had to really look
at how I deal with pride?
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How do I do with the fact
that it may not be as blatant
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nor as obvious to some
one else's, but it was always
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this underlying thing.
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So in my rebellion I really
want to ask the people around
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me and God Himself,
what does my pride look like?
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I'm not brave like people.
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In my recovery I said
God show me real gentle.
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You know what I'm a baby,
I'm a baby so I want healing
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but I wanted to
be gentle with me.
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If I have to deal with
this, show it to me gently.
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You're really going to come
in and say I feel like I have
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some rebellion, I know it
is caused by pain, I know it is
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caused by whatever the attack
I was under or the fact that
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I lost my father or the fact
that everybody around me addicts
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or whatever the reason I'm
going to surrender that to You.
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I think I have some pride,
I think I have some anger and
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I'm going to bring that to You.
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The reason you're going to
do that is that for whatever
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I hold on to it is
going to stop me from walking
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out of these addictions.
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It's got to stop me from
walking out of the sadness's in
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my life or the places
that continuing trip me up
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or stop you from that, so
I really want to surrender
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all of it to God.
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God being the
accountability partner.
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One thing I want to suggest
too on top of all this, is to
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make sure that you really
say to someone around you,
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can I open up and
share this with you?
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When I write down all the
stuff, when I write out what
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my resentments are, what my
angers are, what my rebellion
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looks like, and some of
our rebellion looks horrible.
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We end up in jail, we end
up strung out, we end up with
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all that stuff so
you write all that out.
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In your rebellion did you
learn to lie? Did you learn to
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manipulate? Did you learn
to steal? Did you learn to
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play people? All
that stuff, write it out.
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Literally put it on paper
because for some of us we in
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our head cover some of that
stuff but we don't put it down
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on paper, when you put it down
on paper it looks different.
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A lot of you know but I
wrote a book and I was really
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surprised as I was
writing that book, is that my
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rebellion and my junk was so
obvious to me that it made it
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really easy to
realize where I was stuck.
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So write it down and when
you write it down show it to
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someone, and be
careful who you show it to.
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Show it to a Pastor, show
it to someone in a group that
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you go to, show it to a
friend, show it to your spouse.
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If you guys are not
dealing with all that junk.
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Show it to somebody that cares
about you because that person
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will gently allow
you to say it out loud.
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So now you've written it
down, you have said it out loud,
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and then you say to God
forgive me, I surrendered this
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rebellion to You.
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I pray that whatever the
devil meant to do in my life
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to destroy me with, to destroy
my relationship with my family,
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I just surrender all
that to You, I pray that
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the blood of Christ
will just cover that.
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You really are asking
for some huge changes.
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What is really interesting
to me is that we don't have to
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do any of that, I can say I
don't need that, I don't need
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that and keep all
of that in my pocket.
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In a 12 step program what
they call is an alcoholic that
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has come out of their
alcoholism but hasn't changed
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a thing, they
call him a dry drunk.
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Because he is still angry,
he still has all that junk,
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he still has all that rebellion.
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He still has all that
dysfunction in the relationships
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and most people
hate to be around them.
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So even though they are not
drinking, they will say what
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is wrong? I'm not drinking
isn't that what you wanted?
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And their kids or spouse
will say here's a bottle of
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whatever, drink because
you are driving us crazy.
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The only reason they
are saying that is they
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haven't dealt with their stuff.
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So one of the things I
know you can stop all of your
00:11:04.19\00:11:08.32
addiction but if you don't
deal with these hidden things,
00:11:08.35\00:11:10.79
if you don't deal with this
rebellion, and especially the
00:11:10.83\00:11:13.23
anger stuff that stays
underneath the surface.
00:11:13.26\00:11:16.02
If you don't deal with that
you will never fully get well.
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If you don't get well, the
next thing that happens and the
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Bible is real clear
about that is that we pass all
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that stuff down
generationally so that
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the next person that walks
around with every single thing
00:11:28.69\00:11:31.28
you have, are your kids.
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I have worked with people
who are very angry and strung
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out and pretty soon their
kids are angry and strung out.
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You don't even have to ask
where this came from because
00:11:41.48\00:11:45.39
you can see grandpa is
angry and an alcoholic.
00:11:45.43\00:11:48.80
But if you went back far
enough you can see all that
00:11:48.84\00:11:51.60
the Bible talks about 3 or 4
for generations, but somebody
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breaks that generational thing.
00:11:55.14\00:11:56.85
What is amazing, is when
I finally said to God okay
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I'm clueless of all that I have.
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I'm clueless of
what is in side of me.
00:12:04.64\00:12:07.08
I'm clueless of what causes
my rebellion to jump back out
00:12:07.11\00:12:10.37
again, I'm clueless
of my underlying anger so
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I just surrender it all to You.
00:12:13.10\00:12:14.27
I finally did that honestly
and I have a great life,
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I have a great life
who would have guessed it?
00:12:18.61\00:12:21.96
Not only have a great
life but I have found that
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I have talents I
never knew I had.
00:12:25.34\00:12:27.08
I have giftings I never knew
I had, I have the ability to
00:12:27.12\00:12:30.36
love and bring people into my
life, friendships that I never
00:12:30.40\00:12:33.61
knew I could do and all of
a sudden the world changes.
00:12:33.65\00:12:37.33
I would even venture to say
that the colors in the world
00:12:37.37\00:12:41.06
change, that the world is
brighter, that my future has
00:12:41.10\00:12:44.56
more hope in it, that I
literally wake up with joy and
00:12:44.59\00:12:48.19
I can laugh out loud and I
enjoy being in my own skin.
00:12:48.23\00:12:52.32
It is all because I finally
said to God okay if there is
00:12:52.35\00:12:56.19
anything in there, if there
is anything stopping me from
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being able to respond to
You honestly and to the people
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I love, I
surrender, I surrender.
00:13:03.18\00:13:06.92
As soon as I did that I
think all of heaven just
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celebrated, just celebrated
and said you know baby
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I'm going to pour
all that stuff into you.
00:13:13.14\00:13:16.23
I'm going to clean up and
when I clean up you are going
00:13:16.27\00:13:19.50
to feel freer
and lighter and I do.
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And I pray that for
you, I hope that for you.
00:13:21.66\00:13:24.21
If you get stuck you can
e-mail us or call us and we will
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help you through it.
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Until next week will
see ya always remember
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God is crazy about
you and me too. God bless!
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