Welcome back, now I would
like to introduce you to Caleb.
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When I first met you Caleb
you are like 5'6 and now you
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are 6'3 and you did that
growth within the last year
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and a half it seems.
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Do you notice it, or did
all the sudden someone look at
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you like, wow, what happened?
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I noticed it because every
time I went into the bathroom
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and I would look in the
mirror, I'm like wasn't I able
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to see my forehead before?
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And now I can even
see it. That is so funny!
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You have agreed to let me
lead you through prayer of
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healing, so tell us a
little bit about where you came
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from, how you got to
Miracle Meadows, as some of the
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things that have
helped you there.
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I was born in
Tennessee to my mom and dad.
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My parents were very
interactive at first in their
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relationship with each
other, they were very godly.
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They prayed and my mom was
always there, and my dad was
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always there, except
my dad was in the Army.
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Every so often he
would off training.
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For like weeks
or months at a time?
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Just weeks, just
weeks at first, but anyway.
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So our family was very
nice and we had a nice family.
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Then we move to North
Carolina and our family started
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going downhill in
our relationships.
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My mom would, in a
way, she'd cheat on my dad.
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- how did you know that?
Did you know that or sensed it?
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Really at first I didn't
know until I got older and
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I was able to comprehend.
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What is really tough about
that, I want to just jump in.
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Sometimes as adults we
don't realize how much kids
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actually see, as
far as what we do.
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If you are in your mind are
taught one thing, this is how
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God is, this our family is,
and all of a sudden everything
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is falling apart and you
know that everybody is becoming
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very deceptive, then
what is true about life?
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What is true
about anything? - right!
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And that is what you
were feeling? - right!
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So I felt, as you were
saying, I felt mixed emotions.
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I didn't know what to
think about my mom and my dad.
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I didn't know who
I wanted to be with.
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- did they split up? - Right!
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My mom left my dad when I
was about seven years old.
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Off and on my mom would
leave the house, they were not
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officially divorced but
just so they can have a little
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time off because of the
nagging and the annoyance
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that was in the house.
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My mom didn't want to leave
my dad, because my mom wasn't
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able to support
herself and my dad could.
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So it was different, so
my mom would leave my dad for
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a week or two at a time,
find herself a little apartment.
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She would live in the
apartment for maybe a period of
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a month and come
back to the house.
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Did she take you?
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I would go see her
maybe every other week.
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So there was a lot of
issues going on with my mom.
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She started acting out
violently toward my dad.
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Issues I wasn't really
aware of, my mom would get angry
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and someone would say something
to my mom and she would
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come home and
let it out on my dad.
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One time my mom even
pulled a gun on my dad.
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So you saw a ton of
stuff growing up? - right!
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When did you start acting out?
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Because what is interesting
is the lot of people are
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seeing whatever kid is
acting out and angry, they will
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see that but they don't
see the whole family dynamics.
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So when did you start
realizing that you are angry?
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Probably when I was growing
up, little, maybe 7 years old.
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I would act out in
class, there was no one in my
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neighborhood that I
could communicate with.
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We were in a little cul-de-sac,
so we didn't have anyone
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near us so I didn't
have any friends around me.
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That or my age, or however.
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I would go to
school and act up in class.
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Since I was in a private
school they could spank me.
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So I would get spankings
everyday from my principal.
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I was outgoing but
in a disrespectful way.
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With your spankings I'm
sure you just took that and
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said thank you so much?
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Do you know what I mean?
Because when you're angry and
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somebody is spanking
you, you want to act out more.
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So I can see you as a kid
just saying, everything is
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falling apart, nobody is
making sense, nobody is taking
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care of me, and I
just want to scream and all
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you're going to do is spank me?
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Are you kidding me? Right!
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I think what is really
tough is that the whole world is
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demanding you behave and
nobody is behaving around you.
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Crazy stuff, I just
want to adopt you. Go ahead!
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I didn't understand
a lot of things either.
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Everything was all good in
my life, ever thing was going
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okay and then I would see
something happen with my mom
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and then I
would be very violent.
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Because you would try to
pretend it's all good, then the
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reality would hit you.
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After those things my mom,
we moved to Maryland because
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my dad's in the Army, he
has to be stationed in different
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places so we moved Maryland.
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Then my parents
were getting a divorce.
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So my mom stayed in North
Carolina and packed for like
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a week while we left
and went to Maryland.
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We lived in Maryland.
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- Were they still at that
point trying to get together?
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Did they keep coming
together and separating?
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When my dad would leave, at
this point my dad was starting
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to leave to go over to Iraq.
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My mom would come and stay
with us in the house to provide
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a little support, but it
wasn't really supportive it was
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because she
needed someplace to stay.
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You kind of knew that? - right!
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So now you mentioned
something that people do
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not even take into
account, now your dad is going
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to be stationed in Iraq,
were you aware of any the
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news stuff at that time?
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Um, I really didn't like
watching anything that was
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really going on with
my dad, I would always say
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that he might be killed.
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I would always use that
as an excuse for my behavior,
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but my behavior was honestly
based on how I was feeling
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and wanted everyone
around me didn't understand that
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I wanted to give them a little
piece of how I was feeling.
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But even for me
looking at you as a little kid,
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even if you didn't want
that to affect you, that had to
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still be another thing
that was added on to the
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smoldering flame stuff,
now you are looking at your
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father of being
deployed to Iraq.
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So then eventually you get
to Miracle Meadows? - right!
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I started fighting in schools,
as I said I wanted to give
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someone a little
piece of how I was feeling.
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At first it was to
get rid of my anger.
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If someone would get my
face, get within my boundaries,
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honestly the reason I didn't
like that because my dad was
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like, my dad is a very
tough man and I'll say that to
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anyone, he was very strong
and could take a lot of things.
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He would yell at me,
yell at me, and yell at me and
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I would get frustrated
and take it in my heart and
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carry it like a backpack
and get to school and say,
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dad today and we'll have a
good day and make you proud,
00:08:02.67\00:08:05.81
then everything went downhill.
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Then you just
blow. - right, exactly!
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I met this one kid one
time, tell me what you think of
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this, he said he felt like
he had a ball, a metal ball
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in his gut and it
was filled with lava.
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The ball kept breaking
and the lava would seep out.
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He said he spent his
whole day trying to patch those
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areas of up so that
it wouldn't seep out.
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But it always did, and
he was always blowing up.
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He said that whole time
he was this frantic trying to
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be good, trying to patch
it up, trying not to lose it.
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The pressure for him was
amazing, and it seems like what
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you are saying is that the
pressure of trying to do the
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right thing with all this anger,
00:08:48.64\00:08:49.74
and all this
craziness, was horrible.
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Actually I think you
just hit the nail on the head,
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that was actually a
lot of what I was feeling.
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I was trying to be good
for my dad, because I honestly
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wanted to make my dad proud.
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He wouldn't believe that
today, but I was trying to make
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my dad proud of me.
00:09:03.87\00:09:05.13
That was your hearts cry? Right!
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Because I love my dad
with everything I have,
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I just don't show it a lot,
I curse my dad out sometimes.
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I still love him
with everything I have.
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As I said, what you said
honestly was how I was feeling.
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There was a lot of stuff
going on in my life and I was
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constantly trying to
behave, be good and do these
00:09:24.27\00:09:27.33
good thing so I could
get a pat on the back from
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my dad, saying good job.
00:09:30.42\00:09:32.34
I would go on and fight in
school and get suspended for
00:09:32.38\00:09:37.12
whatever. - so
eventually, let's just jump in,
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eventually everything was
so out of control that they
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sent you to Miracle Meadows.
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Did you come willingly? -
at first I got a phone call
00:09:46.13\00:09:49.84
from my dad, I got suspended
from school, and got a phone
00:09:49.87\00:09:53.21
call from my dad and he
said, Caleb what would you think
00:09:53.24\00:09:56.55
if I sent you
to a reform school.
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You would come home every
six months and you would get to
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see me, you'd be there for a
year and a half to two years.
00:10:02.66\00:10:05.55
What would you think about that?
00:10:05.59\00:10:06.99
He said would you be willing
to go? I said yeah, honestly
00:10:07.02\00:10:09.47
anything to get
out of the house.
00:10:09.50\00:10:11.13
- the house was so
crazy at that time?
00:10:11.16\00:10:13.04
Definitely, I was feeling
so much pressure in the house.
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My dad had gotten
married to this girl again so
00:10:15.65\00:10:20.31
I wasn't familiar with her.
00:10:20.35\00:10:22.16
I didn't really like her at all
because she would always show
00:10:22.19\00:10:25.60
a lot of affection towards
her son and a little bit more
00:10:25.63\00:10:29.67
towards my sister, but I
would hardly get anything.
00:10:29.71\00:10:33.28
She tried sometimes, but
it was like you weren't there
00:10:33.32\00:10:36.86
for me through
this, so back off.
00:10:36.89\00:10:39.23
It's hard when you are
filled with that much anger
00:10:39.27\00:10:41.71
to allow people in? - right!
00:10:41.75\00:10:43.94
Because that lava is going
to get on them and it hurts
00:10:43.97\00:10:46.13
them, they just back off.
00:10:46.17\00:10:48.23
So after I came to
Miracle Meadows I started being
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a little, I don't know how
to explain it, kind of like
00:10:55.98\00:11:03.62
a candle, a
little flame started.
00:11:03.66\00:11:06.31
I came to Miracle Meadows
willingly on my own and it got
00:11:06.35\00:11:11.62
a little worse, I came here
with issues and in a way they
00:11:11.66\00:11:16.90
got worse and some got better.
00:11:16.93\00:11:18.53
For instance my anger, I
came here and can remember
00:11:18.57\00:11:22.73
instances where, as I said
before, someone would get in my
00:11:22.76\00:11:26.13
face and it reminded me of
things I went through with my
00:11:26.17\00:11:29.17
dad screaming at me how
are you doing this? Blah, blah,
00:11:29.21\00:11:32.18
blah, blah and I
would strike back.
00:11:32.21\00:11:35.04
And you would
strike back. - right!
00:11:35.08\00:11:37.84
You ended up with a lot
of times in, not seclusion,
00:11:37.87\00:11:41.63
what is the room? -
quarantined. - quarantined.
00:11:41.67\00:11:45.36
They just sent you away
from everybody and you will be
00:11:45.39\00:11:49.02
right here, but it's really
tough is that did that set
00:11:49.06\00:11:52.59
off, because part of you
that no one was seeing or
00:11:52.63\00:11:56.46
hearing you, nobody was
doing the right thing by you.
00:11:56.50\00:12:00.26
So when you are in quarantine
did that push those buttons?
00:12:00.30\00:12:04.49
How dare you put me
over here by myself?
00:12:04.52\00:12:08.46
Yes, and one of the things that
honestly, before if I hadn't
00:12:08.49\00:12:12.40
gone through the things I had,
it would bother me, but I was
00:12:12.43\00:12:16.30
very emotional too, so
besides me fighting I was saying
00:12:16.34\00:12:20.38
I'm going to kill myself.
00:12:20.42\00:12:22.03
It was really just how it
was thinking, I just wanted to
00:12:22.07\00:12:24.11
die, and said that I
was doing to kill myself.
00:12:24.15\00:12:26.65
But I really wasn't going to.
00:12:26.68\00:12:28.01
I just want someone to
pay attention to me. - right!
00:12:28.05\00:12:30.29
I just want someone
to respond. - right!
00:12:30.32\00:12:31.70
I want to see how bad
this hurts, I am in turmoil and
00:12:31.74\00:12:36.67
being tormented by this stuff.
00:12:36.71\00:12:39.18
So I was being put
into a children's hospital,
00:12:39.22\00:12:44.20
for a while, to regain
my self-control and put on
00:12:44.23\00:12:47.87
medicines that would
make me look like a zombie and
00:12:47.91\00:12:51.52
just walk around
like I was crazy.
00:12:51.55\00:12:53.81
I didn't like it, so now
that I'm at Miracle Meadows,
00:12:56.84\00:13:00.86
a structured place, when I
get put into a room by myself,
00:13:00.90\00:13:04.89
it's like I
relive the past again.
00:13:04.92\00:13:07.09
I think about things I
went through and just thinking
00:13:07.12\00:13:10.60
about how I was
before, it just hurts me.
00:13:10.63\00:13:14.30
- So I have to say this, I
love what Miracle Meadows do
00:13:14.33\00:13:19.71
so I understand the room, I
understand the need for safety,
00:13:19.75\00:13:25.09
for yourself and for
the staff, for everybody.
00:13:25.13\00:13:27.08
But it really does push all
those buttons so I would like
00:13:27.11\00:13:30.90
to ask you some
questions about those buttons.
00:13:30.93\00:13:36.25
As I'm getting into recovery
and I'm healing I a lot of
00:13:39.90\00:13:45.06
what God is telling me
to do is to bring some of
00:13:45.09\00:13:46.66
those deeper hurts
to Him and ask Him for
00:13:46.69\00:13:50.53
healing in those areas.
00:13:50.56\00:13:52.77
When I bring them to Him a
lot of times I realize that
00:13:52.80\00:13:55.55
I have to get forgiveness,
or give forgiveness for
00:13:55.58\00:13:58.29
the people around me.
00:13:58.33\00:13:59.54
So I'm going to ask you a
few things because you had said
00:13:59.58\00:14:02.42
you will allow us to do a
prayer with you to show people
00:14:02.46\00:14:05.27
how to do the prayer.
00:14:05.30\00:14:06.74
So I want to ask you, when
you were with your family and
00:14:06.77\00:14:10.81
all that craziness was
going on, everybody was being so
00:14:10.85\00:14:14.32
deceptive and you were
just sitting there with all this
00:14:14.36\00:14:17.91
anger, and all this feeling
inside of you, can you list
00:14:17.94\00:14:21.46
some feeling words
that you were stuck with?
00:14:21.50\00:14:24.62
Anger being one.
00:14:24.66\00:14:27.06
Not respecting people who are
around me, I had disregard for
00:14:31.07\00:14:34.83
everyone who ever
walked the face of the planet.
00:14:34.87\00:14:37.64
At that point I really didn't
care, what did the world do
00:14:37.68\00:14:40.89
for me so why
should I care about them.
00:14:40.93\00:14:43.24
So the fact of losing
faith in people around you.
00:14:45.89\00:14:50.79
That is huge because you
were seven when this started.
00:14:50.82\00:14:55.39
So losing faith,
how about any shame?
00:14:55.42\00:14:57.99
Were you ever ashamed of
yourself and how you acted?
00:14:58.03\00:15:01.93
I was ashamed, not because
of how I acted, but probably
00:15:01.97\00:15:05.84
the responses I got
from the people I loved.
00:15:05.88\00:15:08.70
I would never really
admit it to my dad openly,
00:15:08.74\00:15:11.71
and really emotionally
but, like I said before,
00:15:11.74\00:15:14.68
I really do love my dad.
00:15:14.72\00:15:16.15
And as crazy as my whole
family is, I love every one of
00:15:16.18\00:15:20.27
them, my dad died in a crack
house and people were saying
00:15:20.31\00:15:24.36
you probably have
no feelings for him.
00:15:24.39\00:15:26.23
Absolutely I
have feelings for him.
00:15:26.26\00:15:28.02
Your dad was doing
things in response to what was
00:15:28.06\00:15:32.54
happening with your
mom, so we love the folks,
00:15:32.57\00:15:36.98
our parents, sisters and
brothers and all that stuff.
00:15:37.01\00:15:42.09
So like I was saying, my
dad like I said I love him,
00:15:42.12\00:15:47.59
I wanted him to be happy,
but I wasn't doing the things
00:15:47.62\00:15:53.05
that showed him I
wanted him to be happy.
00:15:53.09\00:15:55.78
You know the love languages,
his love languages is the
00:15:55.82\00:16:00.41
love language of works.
00:16:00.45\00:16:02.10
By showing you love
someone by what you do.
00:16:02.14\00:16:04.92
So when I would go to school,
I would fight and pick up
00:16:04.96\00:16:08.46
the people and throw
them across the room.
00:16:08.49\00:16:11.52
I would get angry and
punch people in the face.
00:16:11.56\00:16:13.89
So in his eyes that
meant that you absolutely
00:16:13.93\00:16:16.22
don't love him. - Exactly!
00:16:16.26\00:16:17.77
He would say Caleb, if you
love me stop telling me you
00:16:17.81\00:16:21.37
love me and do what you need
to do, go on with your life.
00:16:21.41\00:16:25.77
So shame, disappointment,
that you were a disappointment?
00:16:25.80\00:16:29.68
Right! - did you ever
feel like you were a mistake?
00:16:29.72\00:16:33.42
Yes, I gave the analogy...
- not that you made the
00:16:33.45\00:16:37.11
mistake but you
are a mistake? - yes!
00:16:37.15\00:16:39.59
I gave the analogy to my
psychologists, she was like
00:16:39.62\00:16:44.59
play therapy type person,
you would come there and play.
00:16:44.62\00:16:49.56
It was a way to
get out your feelings.
00:16:49.59\00:16:51.59
I gave this analogy that I
was this concoction of stuff
00:16:51.63\00:16:56.67
God used to whip people up
and make them who they are.
00:16:56.71\00:17:01.72
I was like the bottom
scraping of everything.
00:17:01.76\00:17:04.96
Like I was just like
leftovers put together.
00:17:05.00\00:17:08.17
You didn't even
think about this,
00:17:08.21\00:17:10.08
it was just
whatever was left. - right!
00:17:10.11\00:17:11.85
So could you imagine like
now, that you have done a lot
00:17:11.89\00:17:15.01
healing, could you
imagine now what that must have
00:17:15.04\00:17:18.12
felt like at 7, or 5?
00:17:18.16\00:17:20.24
I do think about it
sometimes how I was feeling,
00:17:22.13\00:17:25.43
and sometimes I
regret the things that I did,
00:17:25.46\00:17:28.73
all the things that I did.
00:17:28.77\00:17:30.21
So I what I would like
to do is to think about,
00:17:30.24\00:17:33.50
the Bible says that the
devil is like a roaring lion
00:17:33.54\00:17:39.16
looking to see who he
can devour, and when people
00:17:39.20\00:17:43.21
start acting out in
families, all of a sudden that
00:17:43.24\00:17:47.22
devouring becomes
easy. You know what I mean?
00:17:47.25\00:17:49.50
Your mom decides she's
going to go over here and start
00:17:49.54\00:17:52.17
playing around, she's
look at other guys, she's doing
00:17:52.20\00:17:54.80
whatever and not
realizing that you are affected
00:17:54.84\00:17:58.11
by the whole thing.
00:17:58.14\00:17:59.48
They start fighting, your
home life is falling apart,
00:17:59.51\00:18:02.12
this normal happy home
that you are comfortable in all
00:18:02.16\00:18:04.73
of a sudden starts changing.
00:18:04.77\00:18:06.36
The devil just jumps in
there and just has a party.
00:18:06.39\00:18:10.28
He loves that stuff, so at
that point in our lives that
00:18:10.31\00:18:13.93
he starts taking all
those feelings that you felt and
00:18:13.96\00:18:17.54
starts right in your
ear, nah, nah, nah, nah,
00:18:17.58\00:18:21.64
do you know what I mean?
00:18:21.67\00:18:22.82
So I would like to start
prayer with the things that he
00:18:22.85\00:18:28.58
decided to do in your
life, to destroy you with.
00:18:28.62\00:18:31.61
I would like you
to take those back.
00:18:31.65\00:18:34.87
Because in Christ, you are
a Christian right? - right!
00:18:34.90\00:18:38.74
Christ says I died for those
things, I so died for those
00:18:38.77\00:18:42.57
things, do you
believe that? - yeah!
00:18:42.61\00:18:44.58
Tell me where
you are spiritually,
00:18:44.62\00:18:46.62
so I know you're
are spiritually at?
00:18:46.65\00:18:48.59
I guess you could say I relapsed
before and I'm trying to
00:18:48.62\00:18:52.56
get back up, before I was having
a good relationship with God
00:18:52.59\00:18:56.49
prayer for the people
that I love and I wanted God
00:18:56.53\00:18:59.89
to be with me in my life.
00:18:59.92\00:19:01.02
I realize how bad the world
was then, everything I went
00:19:01.05\00:19:04.13
through before it
came to Miracle Meadows.
00:19:04.17\00:19:05.88
You know what could have
happened to me, I could be dead
00:19:05.92\00:19:08.94
right now because the kids
I used to fight with weren't
00:19:08.97\00:19:11.96
little, they were bigger.
00:19:11.99\00:19:14.59
So I honestly think I
could've been dead right now.
00:19:14.62\00:19:19.65
Yeah, some of the things.
00:19:19.69\00:19:21.69
So what I believe is that
the devil came into your home
00:19:21.73\00:19:26.05
and trashed everybody, and
he doesn't wait until you are
00:19:26.08\00:19:30.37
of age, oh wait, can't
trash Caleb because he's only 7!
00:19:30.41\00:19:33.27
Do you know what I mean,
he loves to get us early.
00:19:33.31\00:19:36.11
The Bible talks in one of
the chapters to fight against
00:19:36.14\00:19:39.14
the schemes of the devil, I
think the schemes of the devil
00:19:39.17\00:19:42.13
are the things he
sets up in our lives.
00:19:42.17\00:19:44.67
To fight against those, and
right now the schemes of the
00:19:44.70\00:19:48.20
devil in your life, is
you are nothing, they are not
00:19:48.23\00:19:51.54
taking care of you, you
were the low of the lowest.
00:19:51.58\00:19:55.58
All of heaven says that
is a lie, that is such a lie.
00:19:55.62\00:19:59.58
So with that lie being
told to you, that all the
00:19:59.62\00:20:04.13
feelings that happened in
your life, anger, bitterness,
00:20:04.16\00:20:08.41
rage, shame, all those kind
of things are the things you
00:20:08.45\00:20:12.66
have now got in your
pockets and you live with.
00:20:12.70\00:20:16.35
So are going to
surrender of those things.
00:20:16.39\00:20:18.92
I want you in this
prayer, I want you to take
00:20:18.95\00:20:21.13
full responsibility
for all those things.
00:20:21.17\00:20:23.24
For your own anger
and your own stuff.
00:20:23.28\00:20:25.28
What is really interesting
to me when I started to look
00:20:25.31\00:20:28.57
at this, is God died
for me, Jesus died for me.
00:20:28.60\00:20:33.62
He said let Me have all
that stuff, let Me have your
00:20:33.65\00:20:36.58
molest, let Me have your
shame, let Me have the fact that
00:20:36.62\00:20:39.50
you feel worthless, let Me
have that and let Me pour into
00:20:39.54\00:20:42.39
you how incredible you are.
00:20:42.43\00:20:44.97
Do you believe in a
spiritual sense that you were
00:20:45.00\00:20:47.66
never a mistake? - Yes I do
believe, I was never a mistake.
00:20:47.69\00:20:52.71
Once you go through certain
things you know the picture
00:20:52.75\00:20:57.19
becomes a little bit clearer,
at first I believed I was
00:20:57.23\00:21:01.08
a mistake, then I started
to get closer to God and He
00:21:01.12\00:21:05.06
would give me revelations,
not actual revelations,
00:21:05.10\00:21:08.97
just let me know that I was
not mistake and that I am on
00:21:09.01\00:21:12.14
this earth for a purpose.
00:21:12.18\00:21:13.57
All I have to do straighten
out my life and I can bring
00:21:13.61\00:21:15.70
a lot of people to Him.
00:21:15.73\00:21:17.55
Amen, because you
know there is healing.
00:21:17.58\00:21:20.58
Okay so if I was going to
say, name some of the things
00:21:20.62\00:21:25.13
that have stayed in your
life, got stuck in your life,
00:21:25.17\00:21:28.81
the rings of your life
because of what happened to you
00:21:28.85\00:21:32.39
early on, you said anger
was one for sure, shame and
00:21:32.43\00:21:35.94
feeling like you are a
mistake, anything else?
00:21:35.98\00:21:38.41
Any depression or
any of that stuff?
00:21:38.45\00:21:41.04
Yeah, I have a lot of depression
and sometimes even think
00:21:41.08\00:21:47.15
of suicide, but I'm
trying to get over that now.
00:21:47.18\00:21:50.86
Because I realize it is
like walking in the middle
00:21:50.90\00:21:54.53
of a movie theater you
want to see the movie but it's
00:21:54.56\00:21:57.98
getting too intense so
you wasted your money and you
00:21:58.02\00:22:01.40
leave, I don't want to do that.
00:22:01.44\00:22:03.51
I want to go
through the whole thing and
00:22:03.55\00:22:04.68
see what is happening
at the end of my life.
00:22:04.72\00:22:06.77
What is really fun when you
say that, is my sense of even
00:22:06.80\00:22:09.90
when I first met you, is
that God is going to stand you
00:22:09.94\00:22:13.00
up and you are going to
do some powerful things,
00:22:13.04\00:22:14.91
helping other folks
heal with their issues.
00:22:14.95\00:22:18.37
So the end of the movie for
you, using the same analogy,
00:22:18.40\00:22:22.04
is probably
going to be so amazing.
00:22:22.07\00:22:24.83
I think the devil
would love to take us out.
00:22:24.86\00:22:27.57
Like we hit this hard time
and devil says no, no just take
00:22:27.60\00:22:32.88
yourself out, we never
get to see the joy of our
00:22:32.92\00:22:35.09
recovery, for you the joy
of your recovery is going to
00:22:35.13\00:22:38.58
be huge, not only for you
but for your father and for
00:22:38.61\00:22:42.03
the people that
love you. - right!
00:22:42.07\00:22:43.70
We're going to start prayer,
I'm going to have you first
00:22:43.73\00:22:49.78
of all look at anybody in
your life that you have really
00:22:49.82\00:22:55.84
intense, like are
you angry at your mom?
00:22:55.87\00:22:58.75
Or your father, is
there any of that left?
00:22:58.79\00:23:01.59
No I forgave my mom a
long time ago. - everything?
00:23:01.63\00:23:05.22
Yeah. - are you
sure? - yeah. - okay!
00:23:05.25\00:23:07.23
Anybody in your life that
you feel like this person,
00:23:07.27\00:23:10.77
for some reason I have some,
00:23:10.80\00:23:12.43
a little bit of
stuff still here?
00:23:12.46\00:23:14.57
Maybe my stepmom, I still,
even though I triggered her to
00:23:25.33\00:23:29.15
do a lot of the things she
did, you know because I didn't
00:23:29.19\00:23:33.58
respect her, I still don't like
her for a lot of the things.
00:23:33.61\00:23:37.97
- why couldn't
to love me? - right!
00:23:38.00\00:23:39.56
- Why couldn't it be fair?
So before we go on to prayer,
00:23:39.60\00:23:43.66
I would like you to start
with that prayer and just ask,
00:23:43.69\00:23:47.72
tell God you forgive
her, I forgive her and say
00:23:47.75\00:23:51.99
some things that you
want to forgive her for.
00:23:52.02\00:23:55.69
The biggest thing is
the fact of not loving you.
00:23:55.73\00:23:59.33
You have watched her love
the people around you and you
00:23:59.37\00:24:02.11
had such a hole in your
heart that wanted to be loved,
00:24:02.15\00:24:05.07
that you knew when she looked
at you that you didn't get
00:24:05.11\00:24:07.99
that from her, and so
to forgive her for that.
00:24:08.03\00:24:10.60
Once you forgive her for
that, then we are going to start
00:24:10.64\00:24:13.88
prayer as far as reclaiming
everything the devil meant to
00:24:13.91\00:24:17.12
destroy you with,
because he meant to destroy you,
00:24:17.15\00:24:19.04
you know that,
this was a battle.
00:24:19.08\00:24:21.64
The battle for you was
for your very life, definitely
00:24:21.67\00:24:25.18
your mind and so saying to
the devil all that you meant
00:24:25.21\00:24:28.57
to destroy me with I am
going to reclaim and take full
00:24:28.61\00:24:31.58
responsibility for that
and then I'm going to give it
00:24:31.61\00:24:34.54
to God because He died for me.
00:24:34.58\00:24:37.00
You know I believe this so
much that when I did it for
00:24:37.03\00:24:41.35
myself, on certain
issues I have never had issues
00:24:41.39\00:24:44.17
with that again, ever.
00:24:44.21\00:24:46.31
So I'm going to ask Miracle
Meadows group to come up and
00:24:46.35\00:24:49.56
join us for this prayer.
00:24:49.59\00:24:50.79
If you guys can come up
and literally put your hands
00:24:50.83\00:24:53.53
on him, and your hand on me.
00:24:53.57\00:24:55.86
How about everybody,
just everybody come up.
00:24:55.89\00:24:58.25
It's really tough because
we are onset, but being onset
00:25:00.30\00:25:03.88
doesn't change the fact
that this prayer for us,
00:25:03.91\00:25:07.03
and for you, for him,
you guys love him right?
00:25:07.06\00:25:10.44
So we really are
praying for your total recovery,
00:25:10.48\00:25:13.79
that you understand for
the first time who you are and
00:25:13.83\00:25:17.48
the fact that it
matters that you are here.
00:25:17.51\00:25:19.89
The people around you weren't
able to do that because of
00:25:19.93\00:25:22.96
their own stuff, but God
says if you trust Me I'll do
00:25:23.00\00:25:25.99
for you, I will do that for you.
00:25:26.03\00:25:28.09
Okay give me your hands.
00:25:28.12\00:25:29.95
I want you to start up
with forgiving your stepmom,
00:25:29.99\00:25:34.44
and really just
talk about what it is
00:25:34.47\00:25:36.68
you are forgiving her for.
00:25:36.72\00:25:38.37
Dear Heavenly Father, I lift
up to you my feelings towards
00:25:38.40\00:25:44.31
my stepmother, I want You
to take away all harsh feelings
00:25:44.34\00:25:50.21
that I still have towards her.
00:25:50.25\00:25:51.88
Even though I pushed her
away, she tried loving me,
00:25:51.91\00:25:55.86
she tried caring but I
pushed her away and I feel
00:25:55.89\00:25:59.12
like there is something
she could have done to make me
00:25:59.15\00:26:02.34
not feel, or not
push her away Father.
00:26:02.38\00:26:04.66
Please help me to forgive
her for that and please help
00:26:04.70\00:26:08.01
me to forgive all the other
harsh feelings that may not
00:26:08.05\00:26:11.32
be visible my life right now.
00:26:11.36\00:26:13.94
Father help them come to
the surface so I can see them
00:26:13.97\00:26:17.01
so I can forgive them.
00:26:17.05\00:26:18.88
I come along side Caleb
and just say fill him with
00:26:18.91\00:26:22.72
forgiveness for his mom and
his dad and what ever is left
00:26:22.75\00:26:26.74
for school and principle
and people that looked at his
00:26:26.78\00:26:30.68
anger and ran, because
what he was screaming was please
00:26:30.71\00:26:34.58
don't run from me,
please come up and hold me.
00:26:34.61\00:26:36.95
So I just pray Father for
forgiveness, whatever is left
00:26:36.98\00:26:40.10
in his heart I just pray
Father for complete forgiveness.
00:26:40.14\00:26:43.35
I also ask You for all
the things the devil meant to
00:26:43.39\00:26:47.09
destroy him with, all the
junk, all the hurts in his
00:26:47.12\00:26:49.91
life, all the shame and
the fact that he felt like
00:26:49.95\00:26:52.67
a mistake, that he wasn't
and he didn't belong anywhere.
00:26:52.70\00:26:55.92
The fact nobody was seeing
him and all those things I pray
00:26:55.95\00:26:59.14
for Caleb that he takes
full responsibility of that,
00:26:59.17\00:27:02.81
his bitterness and his anger,
that he takes it right back
00:27:02.85\00:27:06.59
from the devil and takes it
right into his own hands and
00:27:06.62\00:27:09.91
he surrenders that to you
because I know that You died for
00:27:09.94\00:27:13.26
him and I pray that You
take all that rage and all that
00:27:13.29\00:27:16.80
anger and all that sadness
and depression and suicidal
00:27:16.83\00:27:20.31
stuff, the things that had
just plagued him and tormented
00:27:20.34\00:27:23.54
him through these young
years, I pray that You take that
00:27:23.57\00:27:26.73
and that he knows
that You have taken that.
00:27:26.77\00:27:29.02
He knows that You died for
that and that he knows that You
00:27:29.05\00:27:32.33
want to fill him up with
love and joy and peace and
00:27:32.37\00:27:34.93
patience and
self-control and that you want
00:27:34.96\00:27:37.57
to fill him
with the Holy Spirit.
00:27:37.61\00:27:39.08
I pray Father for this man
of God, this person that will
00:27:39.12\00:27:42.53
stand up in his life and
bring hope to those around him.
00:27:42.57\00:27:45.87
I pray that what he feels
in his life right now is love,
00:27:45.90\00:27:49.67
peace, joy, self-control,
what he feels in his life is
00:27:49.71\00:27:53.12
that You are his Father and
that You are so proud of him.
00:27:53.15\00:27:56.79
I also pray for his favor
in his father's eyes, that his
00:27:56.83\00:28:00.37
father looks at him and
sees such a change that he will
00:28:00.41\00:28:03.97
feel so proud that this is
my son and I am well pleased.
00:28:04.01\00:28:07.42
I know that you know Father
what that is like and I just
00:28:07.45\00:28:10.83
ask You for that to
be true in Caleb's life.
00:28:10.87\00:28:13.37
I pray for all these
people that are around Caleb
00:28:13.40\00:28:15.76
with their hands on him.
00:28:15.80\00:28:17.25
Their hearts just longs for
him to feel that freedom from
00:28:17.29\00:28:19.52
all this junk, of all
these emotional things.
00:28:19.56\00:28:21.90
So we are praying right now for
the Holy Spirit to fill him up,
00:28:21.93\00:28:24.74
for him to heal emotionally,
physically, spiritually for
00:28:24.78\00:28:29.11
every single thing that has
stayed and his pockets and for
00:28:29.14\00:28:32.94
those to be emptied out
that he stands free and able to
00:28:32.97\00:28:36.73
look at his life and ask
God what is my next step.
00:28:36.76\00:28:39.66
Let him take
that step with ease.
00:28:39.70\00:28:41.83
I thank You for that
and that You love us.
00:28:41.87\00:28:43.84
I thank You that with all
this junk, these hurts, all this
00:28:43.88\00:28:47.18
stuff that is put into our
minds and our lives from early
00:28:47.22\00:28:50.26
on, that You are bigger than
all of that and You can bring
00:28:50.29\00:28:53.43
healing and so were asking
for healing in Caleb's life.
00:28:53.46\00:28:56.61
I am privileged to be his
friend, I'm privileged to be a
00:28:56.64\00:28:59.35
part of his life, and I'm
privileged to be in this prayer.
00:28:59.39\00:29:02.06
In Jesus name, Amen! - Amen!
00:29:02.10\00:29:04.95
Thank you for joining us on
this and I ask you to remember
00:29:06.90\00:29:09.94
Caleb in prayer, remember
all of us because when you run
00:29:09.97\00:29:13.18
across people, these are
the layers people walk around
00:29:13.21\00:29:16.39
with, so just
remember that in your prayer.
00:29:16.42\00:29:19.68
Remember that God says I
want to free you from that.
00:29:19.71\00:29:22.56
I don't want you to be
manipulated for the rest of
00:29:22.59\00:29:25.37
your life with feeling like you
are a mistake and all that junk.
00:29:25.41\00:29:28.04
I want you to surrender
that, and He so freely waits
00:29:28.07\00:29:30.80
for us to do that.
00:29:30.84\00:29:31.93
We are going to be right
back, stay with us because
00:29:31.96\00:29:35.02
I'm going to introduce you
to another staff person and
00:29:35.06\00:29:38.08
she has an incredible testimony.
00:29:38.12\00:29:40.16