You know, I don't know
about you but I can feel the
00:00:14.23\00:00:16.71
healing happening even
on the set, as I look at
00:00:16.74\00:00:19.15
Michael when I first met
him my feeling was that I just
00:00:19.18\00:00:23.73
didn't even want to like you.
00:00:23.76\00:00:25.14
Then I hear your damage
as a child and where you came
00:00:25.17\00:00:28.80
from, and all
those kind of things,
00:00:28.83\00:00:30.02
and literally in a nice way,
00:00:30.06\00:00:32.25
the Holy Spirit confronts
me on my unforgiveness.
00:00:32.28\00:00:35.91
And as I'm listening to
your story and how God brought
00:00:35.94\00:00:40.12
you to a place where you
can look at Ecclesiastics and
00:00:40.15\00:00:44.07
start talking about vanity
and vanity then back to your
00:00:44.11\00:00:47.83
childhood and continue there,
cause I think it is amazing.
00:00:47.86\00:00:51.55
I want to say that
it's really funny that if
00:00:51.58\00:00:55.52
you would have told me
at one point that some of my
00:00:55.56\00:00:58.28
healing was going to
come from a club owner, or a
00:00:58.32\00:01:01.00
manager I would
have said you are crazy.
00:01:01.04\00:01:03.23
And I want to thank you
because I feel that some of my
00:01:03.27\00:01:06.27
healing is coming from you
today, with this testimony.
00:01:06.31\00:01:09.28
So talk about, what
did you find - while I was
00:01:09.32\00:01:13.53
reading
Ecclesiastical all that night.
00:01:13.57\00:01:15.46
I found many different
things and basically, I found
00:01:15.49\00:01:18.89
that a person as in
myself had accumulated a lot of
00:01:18.92\00:01:22.28
things in life that
meant nothing - right.
00:01:22.32\00:01:24.29
I learned that there
were no U-Haul trailers behind
00:01:24.33\00:01:27.64
hearses and I wasn't
taken anything with me - but you
00:01:27.68\00:01:30.96
had all this stuff, all
this money - everything.
00:01:30.99\00:01:33.17
I had everything that everyone
wish they had and I also
00:01:33.21\00:01:35.92
was not married and
I'm still not married,
00:01:35.96\00:01:38.01
did not ever have any kids.
00:01:38.05\00:01:39.66
Everything was paid for
it was just all money to me.
00:01:39.70\00:01:43.82
I had somebody come into
the club that was going to be
00:01:43.86\00:01:48.05
doing some foreign work,
mission work, not missionary
00:01:48.08\00:01:52.24
work, but civil service work.
00:01:52.27\00:01:54.53
And it made me consider
things about doing some things
00:01:54.57\00:01:57.10
for free, and he was in there
for a going away party, that is
00:01:57.14\00:02:00.01
really all relevant to
this, but I considered - but in
00:02:00.05\00:02:03.38
that life you wanted to
know what was the angle - yeah.
00:02:03.42\00:02:06.71
Do you know what I
mean, everybody has an angle.
00:02:06.75\00:02:08.71
So what you mean
you're doing it for free?
00:02:08.75\00:02:09.91
Yeah - or just doing it
out of the goodness of your
00:02:09.94\00:02:12.10
heart - yeah you think
you going to be doing this for
00:02:12.14\00:02:14.32
two years and I never thought
I would do some like that.
00:02:14.35\00:02:16.71
So I start considering
that here, I have taken so much
00:02:16.74\00:02:19.06
in my life from
people, it's time to give back.
00:02:19.09\00:02:21.85
Perhaps I'm thinking.
00:02:21.89\00:02:23.82
So in that club and I want
to say, Cheri, and also for
00:02:23.85\00:02:28.73
your viewers here, that
praise God we have a God who
00:02:28.77\00:02:33.61
meets us where were at.
00:02:33.65\00:02:34.90
Amen - no matter what side
of the coin you are on - He
00:02:34.93\00:02:37.72
loves us, like you
say He is crazy about us.
00:02:37.76\00:02:41.10
And I use it a lot to
begin about you - do you - He is
00:02:41.13\00:02:44.64
He is crazy about us.
00:02:44.68\00:02:45.97
He pulls us close and I
started seeing myself as this
00:02:46.01\00:02:51.58
little boy with my
hand in Hand in His hand.
00:02:51.61\00:02:53.67
Anytime I go through some
difficulties I just revert to
00:02:53.71\00:02:56.63
that little boy and just
think I'm this little boy, He
00:02:56.67\00:02:59.56
is my God, He is my Shepherd.
00:02:59.59\00:03:01.07
He's my leader,
and I follow Him.
00:03:01.11\00:03:03.98
And listen to that small
voice that often look for.
00:03:04.02\00:03:07.47
I felt something was
pulling me, was leading me.
00:03:07.50\00:03:11.08
So I had walked out of the
clubs and laid the keys down
00:03:11.11\00:03:13.78
and literally within ten
minutes I was outside the club.
00:03:13.81\00:03:17.14
My brother asked me, are
you serious, you're just joking
00:03:17.17\00:03:20.47
around, we've got a
New Year's party going on.
00:03:20.50\00:03:23.17
Because this is a two
thousand - you just can't walk
00:03:23.21\00:03:25.33
out - no you just can't
we've got a New Year's party
00:03:25.36\00:03:27.44
you're kidding me,
no, you're serious.
00:03:27.48\00:03:29.42
You're going to
walk away from the money?
00:03:29.46\00:03:31.54
The cars, the
House, you're inheritance?
00:03:31.58\00:03:33.60
Yeah, that's what it's
going to take and at that time.
00:03:33.63\00:03:36.49
I thought I would be
better off being a wino, hanging
00:03:36.52\00:03:39.35
out in San Diego
looking at the sun go down.
00:03:39.38\00:03:41.36
Then two to keep dealing
with this stuff and I wasn't
00:03:41.39\00:03:44.17
happy, maybe there was
some happiness in that.
00:03:44.20\00:03:45.74
But I was going to go out
there and find out what was
00:03:45.77\00:03:48.12
going to make me happy.
00:03:48.16\00:03:49.48
Still thinking, what
was going to make me happy.
00:03:49.51\00:03:52.17
But as I started looking
more at this book and starting
00:03:52.21\00:03:54.78
reading it, this
book starts speaking to me
00:03:54.82\00:03:57.32
that there was life in this
book, and it was giving me life.
00:03:57.36\00:04:00.44
So I started my
studies with the church,
00:04:00.48\00:04:05.24
one thing led to another.
00:04:05.28\00:04:06.82
I heard Doug Batchelor,
he spoke about that - he's
00:04:06.86\00:04:11.16
awesome isn't he
- oh he's wonderful.
00:04:11.19\00:04:12.49
There is a lot of people
that are at church that are
00:04:12.52\00:04:14.60
awesome, I was like who are
these people, I haven't been
00:04:14.63\00:04:16.67
who are they?
00:04:16.70\00:04:18.01
They talk about this
David Asscherick and they
00:04:18.05\00:04:20.47
said that this guy
is a little radical.
00:04:20.51\00:04:21.95
I've got to tell you,
Doug Batchelor one time,
00:04:21.98\00:04:23.57
because when I go to see
him. I'm just get off the
00:04:23.61\00:04:25.12
street and just getting
off the drugs and he's talking.
00:04:25.16\00:04:27.46
He is in the back
getting ready to come on stage.
00:04:27.49\00:04:30.46
I don't know if you call
it a stage when it's in the
00:04:30.49\00:04:33.42
church, but you
know, what I mean.
00:04:33.46\00:04:34.76
So he's got to come back,
and he stuck himself in the
00:04:34.79\00:04:37.45
eye with a stick,
and I'm thinking oh man.
00:04:37.48\00:04:40.08
So he comes out, and he is
like blood red, and he says
00:04:40.11\00:04:44.28
something and starts his
revelation series, and pretty
00:04:44.31\00:04:47.87
soon he looks up and says,
I just want you to know, kind
00:04:47.91\00:04:51.43
of like I'm not high, I just
00:04:51.46\00:04:53.80
injured my eye, I stuck
myself tonight with a stick.
00:04:53.84\00:04:56.25
And I'm thinking nobody's
going to think you're high
00:04:56.29\00:04:58.90
with just one eye is red,
and one eye is totally clear.
00:04:58.94\00:05:01.36
But I feel in love with
him, because I thought for an
00:05:01.40\00:05:03.79
addict we always it is so real.
00:05:03.83\00:05:05.79
It really is for someone
saying, this is where I come
00:05:05.82\00:05:08.57
from, this is what
I still struggle with.
00:05:08.61\00:05:10.19
I still think you think I'm
high sometimes and I just want
00:05:10.22\00:05:13.57
you to know I'm not.
00:05:13.61\00:05:14.69
I love God and
so he was very real.
00:05:14.73\00:05:17.07
So when you came in, you
got hit with some men that were
00:05:17.11\00:05:20.71
very real in their
recovery - I read the David
00:05:20.74\00:05:23.34
Asscherick story, from
going from a punk rocker and ten
00:05:23.38\00:05:25.57
years later, - a skater -
and then preaching the word.
00:05:25.61\00:05:30.09
You know, he pours his
guts out, I want to say stage
00:05:30.12\00:05:34.57
to but from the pulpit.
00:05:34.60\00:05:35.70
It went to his
school, I went to Arise.
00:05:35.73\00:05:37.92
So this is from your recovery,
you literally stepped in
00:05:37.95\00:05:42.79
and started getting
mentoring by these men of God.
00:05:42.83\00:05:46.36
How cool is that - actually
six months after walking
00:05:46.40\00:05:49.52
out that club on July 15 -
you know what I just thought
00:05:49.55\00:05:52.40
of shame right now, I'm
glad that you didn't run into me
00:05:52.44\00:05:55.34
first, because I might have
injured you and I want to say
00:05:55.38\00:05:58.25
I'm sorry for that.
00:05:58.28\00:05:59.26
I worried about that - yeah,
because some people probably
00:05:59.30\00:06:02.05
did look at you like,
who are you to come in here.
00:06:02.09\00:06:04.63
Not many people stepped up
to that, I'm glad that it was at
00:06:04.66\00:06:07.17
this point right now.
00:06:07.20\00:06:08.18
But you laid me low,
laid me low and made me think
00:06:08.21\00:06:10.50
and consider that I will
share this with some of my
00:06:10.53\00:06:12.78
team members.
00:06:12.81\00:06:13.78
I've thought of you when I
was even at the school Arise,
00:06:13.82\00:06:17.46
someone said to me, I
don't even know why this school
00:06:17.49\00:06:21.09
let you in here.
00:06:21.13\00:06:22.25
Why they would even have
you around all these young
00:06:22.28\00:06:24.14
girls around here - wow.
00:06:24.17\00:06:25.55
I felt so dirty, and I
felt so bad - as if you weren't
00:06:25.58\00:06:28.42
forgiven - yeah.
00:06:28.46\00:06:29.66
Actually I left the class
and went back to my room, and
00:06:29.70\00:06:33.18
normally you would get
anger with something like that.
00:06:33.21\00:06:36.24
Well, I give you punch, you
know, but I didn't even feel
00:06:36.27\00:06:39.27
that - you were just so
crushed - I was crushed.
00:06:39.30\00:06:42.31
I just really said Man,
this is not going to work.
00:06:42.34\00:06:45.28
As I started thinking over
the event, I thought that in
00:06:45.31\00:06:48.13
my other life, that I just
knocked this man back a few
00:06:48.17\00:06:50.96
feet and I didn't.
00:06:50.99\00:06:53.14
Then I realized that something
was working in my life,
00:06:53.17\00:06:55.65
because I did not
feel those feelings.
00:06:55.69\00:06:57.68
So, I want back to that
classroom, we were studying on
00:06:57.72\00:07:00.07
Romans that day,
so how cool is that!
00:07:00.10\00:07:02.11
The thing was on Romans.
00:07:02.15\00:07:03.58
The healing started
beginning in that and I started
00:07:03.61\00:07:08.15
doing other things,
reading more in the word.
00:07:08.19\00:07:10.47
Yeah, it's just been
wonderful God has - we are going
00:07:10.51\00:07:15.27
to open it up for
questions or comments.
00:07:15.30\00:07:17.03
I just want to say, I'm
honored to sit next to you
00:07:17.06\00:07:19.75
doing ministry -
praise Lord on that.
00:07:19.79\00:07:22.05
You know, I've always got
to humble myself in that, it
00:07:22.08\00:07:25.01
is always a challenge in that.
00:07:25.04\00:07:26.01
Okay, I know there is a
lot of comments, but you know,
00:07:26.05\00:07:31.15
Jonathan you were like, I
think you are like a preacher.
00:07:31.19\00:07:35.30
I want to know with listening
to us and talking about
00:07:35.33\00:07:39.41
the different
things we've talked about.
00:07:39.44\00:07:40.93
What's hit you?
00:07:40.96\00:07:43.17
I'm just seeing something
really amazing playing out.
00:07:43.21\00:07:46.33
I mean something happen
back about 2000 years ago, with
00:07:46.36\00:07:50.34
a little girl named Mary.
00:07:50.37\00:07:52.02
Here was a girl, she was
offended by a man Simon, who
00:07:52.06\00:07:56.40
was a Pharisee, who had
offended her and had led her
00:07:56.43\00:08:00.74
into sin. This was
during Jesus time when
00:08:00.77\00:08:02.85
He was walking around.
00:08:02.88\00:08:04.31
That's right, and this
little girl with this damaged
00:08:04.35\00:08:08.30
background goes
into prostitution.
00:08:08.34\00:08:11.51
I even met a girl and
she's a good friend of mine who
00:08:11.55\00:08:15.24
was offended as a little child.
00:08:15.27\00:08:17.89
From a young age she begin
to fantasize about becoming a
00:08:17.92\00:08:21.48
prostitute, because she
feels a loss of value that worth
00:08:21.51\00:08:25.03
was stripped from her
and she would do anything
00:08:25.07\00:08:27.62
to gain it back again.
00:08:27.65\00:08:28.70
And so here's this girl
Mary she is going to the city
00:08:28.74\00:08:31.82
trying to get value back
again by becoming a prostitute.
00:08:31.86\00:08:36.59
And a man comes for her,
Jesus and shows her true worth
00:08:36.63\00:08:41.33
and value and her
heart is just melted.
00:08:41.36\00:08:43.77
Something amazing happened,
here is this woman who is
00:08:43.80\00:08:48.96
responsible for
destroying some people's lives.
00:08:49.00\00:08:52.40
She then looks into the
eyes of Jesus and starts to
00:08:52.43\00:08:55.79
realize that this
man has forgiven her,
00:08:55.83\00:08:57.74
her heart swells in gratitude.
00:08:57.77\00:09:01.40
She goes out and buys the
most expensive perfume, and
00:09:01.43\00:09:04.81
she wants to anoint
Jesus for His death because she
00:09:04.85\00:09:07.63
realizes that He is
going to have to die for her.
00:09:07.67\00:09:12.27
And of all places to
have a party, like there's a
00:09:12.30\00:09:15.86
party going on, and it is
actually Simon the Pharisee
00:09:15.89\00:09:19.41
that is holding a party.
00:09:19.45\00:09:20.94
And here's the man that
has offended this girl Mary -
00:09:20.98\00:09:25.14
so that Simon, it was
probably her molester the person
00:09:25.18\00:09:28.64
that molested her, man -
it was her uncle wasn't it?
00:09:28.68\00:09:31.88
Her uncle like some kind
of guardian that was looking
00:09:31.91\00:09:35.14
after her and - so she
has to walk into his house -
00:09:35.17\00:09:38.36
that's right - to
minister to Christ.
00:09:38.40\00:09:41.45
That's right, and he's
actually holding a party
00:09:41.48\00:09:44.18
because he was being
healed of being a leper.
00:09:44.21\00:09:46.84
So he held this party
and she's a woman that is not
00:09:46.87\00:09:49.43
even supposed to be there.
00:09:49.47\00:09:50.65
But she knows what Jesus
is going to do and she comes
00:09:50.68\00:09:54.16
in with this alabaster
box, and she breaks it and the
00:09:54.20\00:09:57.64
fragrance goes
all through the room.
00:09:57.67\00:10:00.70
Everyone is staring at her.
00:10:00.73\00:10:02.32
This man Simon
actually said to Jesus, if He
00:10:02.36\00:10:05.43
knew what woman she was,
but kind of woman she was,
00:10:05.47\00:10:08.51
He wouldn't let her
in here and He wouldn't
00:10:08.54\00:10:10.92
let her touch Him.
00:10:10.96\00:10:12.03
And what happens is Simon
has this attitude against her.
00:10:12.06\00:10:18.50
Something is happening
in the room, she is looking
00:10:18.53\00:10:21.47
into the eyes of Jesus
realizing that she has been
00:10:21.51\00:10:24.41
forgiven by Him.
00:10:24.44\00:10:25.66
That spirit of forgiveness
is laying some kind of
00:10:25.70\00:10:31.54
conviction on Simon's heart.
00:10:31.57\00:10:33.32
Jesus then turns to Simon
and doesn't actually reveal
00:10:33.35\00:10:36.58
his sin openly, He just
tells the parable and says,
00:10:36.62\00:10:39.81
there was two
people that owed money.
00:10:39.85\00:10:43.10
One owed 58 dollars
and the other 50,000.
00:10:43.13\00:10:46.32
Neither of them could
repay so the owner forgave them
00:10:46.35\00:10:50.09
both, which one of these
two people loved him the most?
00:10:50.13\00:10:54.10
Their response was the one
that was forgiven the most.
00:10:54.13\00:10:58.83
Then Simon knows, he says
Jesus is talking about me, I'm
00:10:58.86\00:11:03.52
the one that owes the most.
00:11:03.56\00:11:05.20
In that very second Mary
looks from the eyes of Jesus
00:11:05.23\00:11:10.17
over to this man Simon,
and he knows he is forgiven.
00:11:10.20\00:11:15.24
And it breaks his heart -
and I feel like in this sense
00:11:15.27\00:11:20.27
that that's even happened.
00:11:20.31\00:11:22.45
And a hate to say that in
a sense that's even happened
00:11:22.48\00:11:24.91
here, and that God says that's
where true healing happens.
00:11:24.94\00:11:28.12
Not only can you receive
that forgiveness, not only that
00:11:28.16\00:11:31.57
you can really understand,
I have so forgiven you, but
00:11:31.61\00:11:34.99
can you offer that
again to someone else.
00:11:35.02\00:11:38.01
It's huge! Here
is this man Simeon,
00:11:38.04\00:11:41.27
here he looks into the
eyes of the one that he has
00:11:42.05\00:11:46.23
offended and she is responding
to him with forgiveness.
00:11:46.26\00:11:49.29
She is looking at him
as a friend and a brother.
00:11:49.32\00:11:53.56
It just breaks his heart
and from that day forth, he
00:11:53.59\00:11:57.79
actually becomes a meek
and lowly disciple of Christ.
00:11:57.82\00:12:00.75
Isn't that
incredible - wonderful.
00:12:00.79\00:12:02.45
It is incredible, there
is something so powerful in
00:12:02.49\00:12:05.73
what Christ says, even
there is a scripture were says,
00:12:05.77\00:12:09.09
that if you are at the altar,
if you come to worship Me.
00:12:09.13\00:12:12.38
Come to bring something to me in
praise, and you think of having
00:12:12.41\00:12:16.83
something against someone.
00:12:16.86\00:12:18.85
Go back to them straighten
that out, and it is amazing
00:12:18.89\00:12:23.23
that I don't even think of
that until I feel something
00:12:23.27\00:12:27.57
well up in me and I
realize I still have it.
00:12:27.61\00:12:29.58
I'm still carrying it,
but God says it is just huge,
00:12:29.62\00:12:33.69
forgiveness, not only
receive it, but offer it.
00:12:33.72\00:12:37.90
I thank you for that
Jonathan. I know Gaea you had
00:12:37.93\00:12:42.07
another, you had a
question or comment.
00:12:42.11\00:12:43.71
Yeah, I relate to both of
your experiences quite a lot.
00:12:43.75\00:12:47.11
especially Cheri's
00:12:47.15\00:12:48.43
When I was younger I experienced
a small bit, yeah just abuse.
00:12:48.46\00:12:53.46
It changed the picture of
myself from that point on.
00:12:53.49\00:12:57.02
I didn't realize the impact
that it had and it took, I
00:12:57.05\00:13:00.54
didn't realize I
needed to be healed.
00:13:00.57\00:13:03.10
I didn't realize that it
affected my picture of God.
00:13:03.13\00:13:05.92
It is amazing to think
that so many girls were all
00:13:05.95\00:13:08.67
affected by your life of
sin, but all of us have lived a
00:13:08.70\00:13:13.41
life away from God and
finding our way back to Him.
00:13:13.45\00:13:16.66
But we damage so
many people along the way.
00:13:16.70\00:13:19.18
We ourselves need healing
and the people we offend need
00:13:19.21\00:13:23.63
healing, I was just personally
wondering how was it that you
00:13:23.66\00:13:28.14
yourself were able to heal
and to be able to see women
00:13:28.18\00:13:31.68
as not just objects.
00:13:31.72\00:13:34.46
How were you able to forgive
yourself and move on, how
00:13:34.49\00:13:38.02
is it that you
are able to do that?
00:13:38.06\00:13:40.37
I believe it's an
ongoing process that goes on.
00:13:40.40\00:13:42.82
How I see women, I did
never see them really as bad.
00:13:42.85\00:13:47.70
I don't have like, I hate
women, or anything like that.
00:13:47.73\00:13:52.55
I actually with a lot of
the girls that I managed,
00:13:52.58\00:13:57.21
I loved them all.
00:13:57.24\00:13:58.34
I mean, I cared for them,
but to do my job I had to veil
00:13:58.38\00:14:02.39
that off I could not
let my emotions show.
00:14:02.43\00:14:04.21
I had to just do the job
and you become an object of
00:14:04.25\00:14:08.04
animosity, I guess
is that the right word?
00:14:08.07\00:14:10.14
Were they hate you for
that, because they want to have
00:14:10.17\00:14:13.08
that connectivity, you
represent like a father figure
00:14:13.11\00:14:16.47
to many of them, but they
just can't get that resolved
00:14:16.50\00:14:19.82
and you just view it as a job.
00:14:19.85\00:14:21.44
When you had mentioned
the play thing, that even when
00:14:21.47\00:14:24.83
you got pulled into it
that they were playthings.
00:14:24.87\00:14:28.19
How do you resolve
some of that stuff?
00:14:28.23\00:14:30.35
Because you know God, I
just think it's amazing like I'm
00:14:30.39\00:14:33.65
listening to your testimony
and think it's amazing that
00:14:33.68\00:14:36.91
I'm getting into a
little bit of how healed me and
00:14:36.94\00:14:40.66
walked me through that.
00:14:40.69\00:14:41.66
How he allowed me to
see men in a different way.
00:14:41.67\00:14:44.34
And I am wondering how
that for you as far as women?
00:14:44.38\00:14:47.86
That is an ongoing thing,
of course, I am single and
00:14:47.89\00:14:51.68
every time I meet someone,
I feel I need to unburden
00:14:51.72\00:14:55.47
give them my testimony.
00:14:55.50\00:14:56.99
You wonder if that's all
conducive, I did this I did that
00:14:57.02\00:15:00.07
and they did that
like, Oh yeah wow.
00:15:00.10\00:15:02.27
Oh well, I will talk
to you later, you know.
00:15:02.31\00:15:03.76
Not that that really has
happened, but everyone has been
00:15:03.80\00:15:06.27
pretty cool about it.
00:15:06.31\00:15:07.28
But it has been damaging
for me to know that I have to
00:15:07.29\00:15:12.22
drag myself over
the coals for this.
00:15:12.26\00:15:13.72
I take it to the Lord, and
I try humble myself as a man,
00:15:13.76\00:15:18.14
but then again, these are
the choices I made in my life
00:15:18.18\00:15:22.53
and I view this is
consequences of these choices.
00:15:22.56\00:15:25.51
We all make choices, and
there are certain consequences
00:15:25.54\00:15:28.22
that we cannot get away from
- you know, I feel like putting
00:15:28.26\00:15:30.52
my hands around your throat
again for a different reason.
00:15:30.55\00:15:32.86
Because that want to say,
don't drag yourself over the
00:15:32.90\00:15:35.55
coals anymore, because you
know, what we can't pay enough.
00:15:35.59\00:15:38.47
That's one thing I learned
in my own recovery is that I
00:15:38.51\00:15:41.36
keep trying to
pay for something.
00:15:41.40\00:15:42.74
Maybe if I paid for this I
could walk in forgiveness in
00:15:42.78\00:15:47.29
a more honest way.
00:15:47.32\00:15:48.39
God says, you know
what you do not have
00:15:48.43\00:15:50.80
enough to pay for this.
00:15:50.83\00:15:52.07
That's why God sent His Son.
00:15:52.10\00:15:53.34
That's what Christ said, I
will totally take all this on,
00:15:53.37\00:15:56.50
every single thing you ever
did, every thought, whatever.
00:15:56.54\00:15:59.64
From this point on, the
point that we accept His
00:15:59.67\00:16:02.82
forgiveness, it's done.
00:16:02.85\00:16:05.11
It's done and even with me
coming up, you're feeling me
00:16:05.15\00:16:09.62
still having that
unresolved stuff, is that by His
00:16:09.65\00:16:12.98
grace I'm going to pray
that when that happens to you.
00:16:13.02\00:16:16.32
You don't try
to fix it for them.
00:16:16.35\00:16:18.19
God - I want to
say something to you,
00:16:18.22\00:16:20.02
I want to say something to you.
00:16:20.05\00:16:21.02
I just want you to
forgive me and want everyone out
00:16:21.03\00:16:26.93
there, and all the girls
that have danced to forgive me.
00:16:26.96\00:16:30.63
I didn't mean to hurt anyone,
it's not my intention, and
00:16:30.67\00:16:34.30
they didn't mean to hurt anyone.
00:16:34.34\00:16:35.85
I'm sorry for the husbands
I took away from their wives.
00:16:35.89\00:16:40.37
They could've been at
home and have a family because
00:16:40.40\00:16:44.85
relationships
are important to God.
00:16:44.89\00:16:46.83
And bringing us back in
healing us is very important.
00:16:46.86\00:16:50.67
And, I thank you for this show
too because there is a lot of
00:16:50.70\00:16:54.74
healing going on and I want
this to go on for everyone too.
00:16:54.78\00:16:58.78
The Lord has blessed -
amen, and a want you to know
00:16:58.82\00:17:03.14
that you are such a man
of God, thank you for that.
00:17:03.18\00:17:07.13
You know, it's like when
we talk about, it is really
00:17:07.16\00:17:10.43
interesting to me and
pastor I want you to respond to
00:17:10.47\00:17:13.71
this a little bit.
00:17:13.74\00:17:14.73
It is when we talk
about forgiveness in that full
00:17:14.76\00:17:18.13
circle, I want, I don't
did we understand that everyone
00:17:18.16\00:17:22.40
is coming from such heavy
places that it really is about
00:17:22.43\00:17:26.63
God trying to do, what God does.
00:17:26.66\00:17:28.43
He is just saying that
every time you can't forgive the
00:17:28.47\00:17:31.55
person next to you,
the Holy Spirit gets stuck
00:17:31.58\00:17:34.00
somewhere, and that
person stays damaged.
00:17:34.04\00:17:36.21
So, for one, I just didn't have
any idea I still had all that
00:17:36.25\00:17:40.63
in me, so I want to
say thank you for that.
00:17:40.67\00:17:44.04
I just want to
encourage you to keep standing.
00:17:44.07\00:17:47.37
I'm praying that God wows
you with a woman, or a wife.
00:17:47.40\00:17:50.93
Do you know what I mean
is that when that comes full
00:17:50.96\00:17:53.69
circle - that's the
Lord's plans there, and I leave
00:17:53.73\00:17:56.39
that to Him because I have
not been the best, well could
00:17:56.42\00:17:59.80
you say, chooser of women.
00:17:59.84\00:18:02.49
You know, there is someone that
is there, and I'll just go my
00:18:02.53\00:18:07.66
course and have Him
lead it step by step.
00:18:07.69\00:18:10.96
You know Pastor, you've
kind of heard what we are going
00:18:10.99\00:18:15.31
through here and I'm
wondering, what do you think?
00:18:15.34\00:18:17.21
As I've been listening to
the testimony dialogue, back-
00:18:17.25\00:18:21.46
and-forth a certain story
comes to my mind from the Bible.
00:18:21.49\00:18:25.20
And it is not about a man
and woman, but about two men.
00:18:25.23\00:18:29.93
One was Stephen, and as he
was being stoned, he was very
00:18:29.96\00:18:34.63
aware of off Saul of
Tares standing there,
00:18:34.66\00:18:36.90
presiding over his murder.
00:18:36.94\00:18:39.50
He had no knowledge of
what was to come later.
00:18:39.54\00:18:45.51
Yet, can you imagine
the resurrection - wow.
00:18:45.54\00:18:51.45
And Stephen feels tap on
his shoulder and he turns
00:18:51.48\00:18:54.49
around and there is Saul
of Tarsus - the very person
00:18:54.53\00:18:57.47
that he doesn't - he doesn't
know that it's the apostle Paul.
00:18:57.50\00:18:59.99
He remembers Saul of Tarsus,
the perpetrator - exactly.
00:19:00.02\00:19:05.81
I think there will be
time there for the asking of
00:19:05.85\00:19:08.89
forgiveness and
forgiveness being given.
00:19:08.92\00:19:12.59
And I just thought many
times that Stephen may have been
00:19:12.63\00:19:17.37
the apostle Paul had he lived.
00:19:17.41\00:19:19.30
He was quite a
powerful preacher.
00:19:19.33\00:19:21.15
And the apostle Paul
stepped in and took his place.
00:19:21.19\00:19:24.52
Can you imagine that
those two, one who presided over
00:19:24.55\00:19:27.81
the death of the other, being
best friends for all eternity.
00:19:27.84\00:19:30.97
That's incredible - that's
just the beauty of the whole
00:19:31.01\00:19:34.23
point of the Gospel, and
forgiveness, and what we have
00:19:34.27\00:19:37.45
to look forward to in heaven.
00:19:37.49\00:19:38.79
I see this and this
type of scenario with a
00:19:38.83\00:19:42.24
perpetrator and a victim.
00:19:42.27\00:19:43.92
In both seeking
and giving forgiveness.
00:19:43.95\00:19:47.30
Absolutely incredible to
think about this, like the
00:19:47.34\00:19:52.84
pastor was saying, that you
have that intensity, knowing
00:19:52.87\00:19:57.17
that somebody literally
had destroyed your life, took
00:19:57.21\00:20:01.35
your life and realize
that God brings us full circle.
00:20:01.39\00:20:05.30
I feel like that is for
all of us at some level,
00:20:05.34\00:20:09.22
He brings it full circle.
00:20:09.25\00:20:11.04
How do you not only deal
with your own issues, I've had
00:20:11.07\00:20:14.72
people that said my
husband left for another woman.
00:20:14.75\00:20:18.36
I can't forgive
them, I can't forgive them.
00:20:18.39\00:20:22.42
I'm sitting here thinking,
it's for our healing for each
00:20:22.45\00:20:26.96
other to forgive.
00:20:27.00\00:20:28.62
Even if they can't receive
it yet, even if they don't
00:20:28.65\00:20:30.55
even know yet.
00:20:30.59\00:20:31.59
I really believe more and
more that there is something
00:20:31.63\00:20:35.17
so huge in being able
to forgive each other.
00:20:35.20\00:20:39.56
God does it graciously.
00:20:39.59\00:20:41.37
Well, I also believe that
in my leaving all that, and
00:20:41.40\00:20:46.99
considering my biological
father who was in this business,
00:20:47.03\00:20:50.10
I started hating on him
for many different reasons.
00:20:50.14\00:20:53.10
Seeing him as this evil
person for all the things that
00:20:53.14\00:20:56.07
he has done.
00:20:56.11\00:20:57.08
In blaming him, and I
started realizing that I had to
00:20:57.10\00:21:02.28
forgive him, but I found
in a pattern in order to do
00:21:02.32\00:21:06.68
that I had to find that
pattern of forgiveness in God.
00:21:06.72\00:21:11.04
When I realize that
God was my Father, and He
00:21:11.08\00:21:14.56
was the one that was
leading me, He said, no you
00:21:14.60\00:21:18.04
need to forgive.
00:21:18.08\00:21:19.22
This is a better way - you know
that and people that watch the
00:21:19.26\00:21:23.43
show, that I had just buried
my father in his addiction.
00:21:23.47\00:21:26.80
So you I'm sure would give
anything for your father get
00:21:26.84\00:21:30.14
this - I would, the
impact that he could make on
00:21:30.17\00:21:34.68
other people's lives.
00:21:34.71\00:21:35.95
Even if this just an impact
on his life, because I told
00:21:35.98\00:21:39.41
him that all the angels
in heaven, would sing and
00:21:39.44\00:21:41.34
rejoice the minute that he
gave his heart to God - and he's
00:21:41.38\00:21:45.09
still in the club smoking
and still it's killing him.
00:21:45.12\00:21:48.06
Yeah, he's got lung cancer
right now and I am praying
00:21:48.09\00:21:50.94
for him, and I'm praying
for my brothers that are in it.
00:21:50.97\00:21:53.79
They have been asking questions.
00:21:53.82\00:21:54.95
You know, it is hard to go
preach to your family - you
00:21:54.99\00:21:58.41
know, I still want to say
that even as you're saying
00:21:58.44\00:22:01.83
this, is that we
still kind of want to judge.
00:22:01.86\00:22:03.84
You're saying, don't judge
him because I want them saved.
00:22:03.88\00:22:08.78
In my sense, don't
judge my family because
00:22:08.81\00:22:12.39
I want them saved.
00:22:12.43\00:22:13.51
Don't judge my sister
because I want her saved.
00:22:13.54\00:22:16.12
And my sister still is
in the club, you know, and
00:22:16.15\00:22:18.70
I want her saved.
00:22:18.73\00:22:20.00
So it is like, it is interesting
to me sitting here with
00:22:20.03\00:22:22.87
you, because I don't think
anybody can have gotten me to
00:22:22.90\00:22:25.70
look at this
issue on this level.
00:22:25.73\00:22:27.77
But sitting here with you
saying that God wants us all
00:22:27.81\00:22:30.94
saved and then wants us to
be in a place of forgiveness
00:22:30.97\00:22:34.38
so that He can continue to
bring our families to the table.
00:22:34.42\00:22:37.79
So many people come up
to me and tell me that my
00:22:37.83\00:22:40.92
daughter danced or my
sister dances and what do you
00:22:40.96\00:22:44.02
think of this.
00:22:44.05\00:22:45.02
What do you think about
rock 'n roll, different things
00:22:45.03\00:22:47.72
has an air of sin on it
and all I can say to them
00:22:47.76\00:22:50.53
is love them.
00:22:50.56\00:22:51.53
Just love them, love them.
00:22:51.54\00:22:53.41
Because that is what
brought you full circle - that
00:22:53.45\00:22:55.89
love - is you felt
the love of God draw you.
00:22:55.93\00:22:57.89
And only by that, and
that's what gives me, - and I
00:22:57.92\00:23:00.70
don't say this too much,
I say thank you for being on
00:23:00.73\00:23:03.12
show all the time, that
cheesy stuff, but I don't say it
00:23:03.16\00:23:05.51
changed my life.
00:23:05.55\00:23:06.64
You know, you changed my
life - we change our lives -
00:23:06.68\00:23:08.99
No No! You change my life
by being brave enough to even
00:23:09.03\00:23:12.17
sit here and go through
this and then by being convicted
00:23:12.20\00:23:15.00
enough, and being able to reach
out and to say, forgive me,
00:23:15.03\00:23:17.79
and so you changed my life.
00:23:17.82\00:23:19.69
As a man of God, so just
received that, and thank you
00:23:19.72\00:23:22.82
for being on the
show, and I would do
00:23:22.85\00:23:24.57
ministry with you
anywhere on the planet.
00:23:24.60\00:23:26.29
Alright - praise
the Lord lets do it.
00:23:26.32\00:23:27.94
Oh man, how could you not
just want to say God teach me.
00:23:27.97\00:23:32.38
Sometimes, I will realize
that what I think I know about
00:23:32.41\00:23:35.87
the Scriptures, what I
think I know about God, what I
00:23:35.91\00:23:39.33
think I know about all
these different things,
00:23:39.36\00:23:41.37
forgiveness and
love and recovery.
00:23:41.40\00:23:43.69
I don't know anything, I
don't know anything I'm just a
00:23:43.72\00:23:46.30
baby and every single time God
says, you know what, let Me step
00:23:46.34\00:23:49.49
you into a deeper understanding
of this so you can heal.
00:23:49.52\00:23:53.90
Not so you can teach the person
next door, but so you can heal.
00:23:53.94\00:23:57.74
I think it is absolutely
amazing and as you sit with
00:23:57.77\00:24:01.14
this after the show is over,
after this program is over.
00:24:01.17\00:24:05.17
As you sit with this open
up the word of God and get
00:24:05.20\00:24:08.09
a clear understanding of
what forgiveness is all about.
00:24:08.12\00:24:10.94
Stay with us, because I'm going
to come back and go through
00:24:10.98\00:24:13.82
this a little bit more of
what I want to just unfold to
00:24:13.86\00:24:16.67
you about forgiveness
and what I have learned here.
00:24:16.71\00:24:18.74
So I'm going to, not go
into it, just stay with us!
00:24:18.78\00:24:21.53
We will be right back!
00:24:21.56\00:24:22.53