Welcome to
Celebrating Life in Recovery!
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I'm Cheri your host.
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Have you ever felt like
what you have done in your past,
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what you have done in
your life, that you don't even
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want to bring up to God?
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You know that nobody
is going to accept that,
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not even God Himself.
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You are going to be
blessed by this program because
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God can heal
anything, come join us!
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Welcome back!
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You know my first journey
with God just cracked me up,
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I was such a mess and
I'm coming out of all that.
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I'm trying to figure out
how to do the right things,
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say the right thing, be
the right thing and I couldn't.
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I just didn't get it
and God was really gentle.
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He would teach me,
like when I was manipulating
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somebody, or lying about
something, and He would say,
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you know what hon,
how about don't lie.
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I would think, oh come on!
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I'm not really lying,
I'm just trying to get
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them to do this.
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He says, that is manipulating,
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how about not manipulating them?
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I'm like what?
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I couldn't get it, so somebody
led me to the Bible which
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is a good place to be led to.
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It is really funny for somebody
that is a mess, we don't
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even know how to
hold the Bible right.
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If you are out there watching
this, then you understand
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this, it's like holding
the Bible and you think this is
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way too holy, do
you know what I mean?
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I'm way too much of a
mess, so you hold it carefully.
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I had a friend and I
love this, this friend used to
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smoke weed all the time
and somebody talked him into
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opening the Bible.
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So he is opening up the
Bible and doing this Bible
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study, and he is smoking
and says, "Man this is good
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stuff", when all of a
sudden and ash from the joint
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fell and hit the
Bible and burned the page.
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When a book is holy He was like,
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"oh! I can't
believe I did that. "
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I said what did you do?
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He said, "well I
switched to a pipe right away. "
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And you know what is
funny I don't want to sound like
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I am somehow putting down
the process, but God starts
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us out when we
don't even know anything.
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We are not smart enough to
even know that you shouldn't
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do a line of Meth and
study the Bible, or smoke weed
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and study the Bible.
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God says, you know
what? open the book where-ever
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you're at, what ever
place you are at where you can
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finally start
looking at what is right.
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What is not right,
what is going to bring you
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out of all this
stuff, just open the book.
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That is where I was at,
so I opened the book and I'm
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thinking I will go
right to the Ten Commandments.
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Because that is
where God took me.
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I'm thinking how funny is that!
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Because the Ten Commandments
for people who are coming
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out of addiction, we
just do not like authority.
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I don't want somebody
to tell me what to do.
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God says I am not really
trying to tell you what to do,
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I'm trying to show you how
to get victory in your life.
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I just want you to stay
with Me on this, because I have
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a crush on God right now
and I have been say that a lot
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lately, but I just love
the way He says, you are in
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bondage to all your junk.
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You are in bondage to
your lies and your drugs and
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addictions and you don't
even know that it is twisting
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around your throat.
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We don't even know that
until we are not breathing,
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you know what I mean it
is taken us down and we are
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actually defining death
from it and God is saying,
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He wants to get that
all untwisted for you.
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For the first
Commandment is what you guys?
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Yeah, I'm the
Lord your God, right?
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The first one starts out
I am the Lord your God who
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took you out of all that stuff.
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Out of heroine addiction,
and sexual addiction, and
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relationship addiction
and all that kind of junk.
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I took you out
of all that stuff.
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I'm the Lord your
God so you know what,
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don't put any
other gods before Me.
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I was so in love with
God because He, I meet Him in
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a drug house trying to
kill myself, teeth missing,
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illiterate and just a mess.
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He put His hand on me and said,
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"I love you and I
will keep you safe. "
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I felt that with everything
in me so I thought okay
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that's good, I can do that one.
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The second one
was not to bad either,
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the second one is what?
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Don't have any graven images.
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Don't have any graven
images and I'm thinking,
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you know what I don't
even have any as I'm looking
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around my house, I'm
thinking there's no little idols
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set up, there's no
Buddha's or whatever.
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I don't have any of that
kind of stuff so I'm okay
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with that and
the Holy Spirit says,
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well images can be anything.
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And I'm, what?
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Anything and then through
the Holy Spirit I saw them
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everywhere, I did have
some stuff to work on that one.
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The third one was don't
say the Lord's name in vain.
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Don't lightly, and I
know everybody knows what I'm
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talking about when I
said that so I don't have to
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repeat it, in fact I
would probably get fired if
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I gave you some examples.
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Don't say the Lord's name
in vain, don't use God and
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Christ to joke about.
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I did that every other
sentence and not even realizing
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it, I would just like oh,
and thinking ouch, was that one?
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I've would feel like all
the angels would say yes that
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was one, but it was so gentle.
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The fourth
Commandment is the Sabbath day.
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That was a cool one for me
because it said every week,
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put a day aside, and
just hang out with Me.
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I am very relational and
didn't have a lot of that
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growing up, so for me,
for God to say I want to
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hang out with you, I
thought how cool are You.
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I thought how are we
going to hang out and He said,
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you love to be outside,
you love to be with friends,
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so hang out with your
family and hang out outside.
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So that was an easy
one and the next one.
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I don't even want to say,
I wanted to say, I can't do
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the next one are you kidding me?
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And the next one is what?
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Jordan, Jordan: honor
your father and your mother.
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Cheri: honor your
father and mother.
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Are you kidding me?
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I don't know if anybody
has a father and mother that
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just wasn't there for you.
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My mom tried to self abort
and she was a mess herself.
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The more I get into healing
the more I understand she
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was a mess herself, but
still how do you honor that.
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My dad molested me most
of my life and left really
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early, and the
other dad is a bartender
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that was an alcoholic.
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I'm thinking God, God
what are You talking about?
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That one was a tough one for me.
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It was really interesting
because when I got to that
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one I had to say God, You
are going to have to do that
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for me, right, because
I don't know how to do it.
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I don't know what to do, I
don't know what it means to
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honor someone, what
does it mean, honor?
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I really had to pay
attention, what does it mean?
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God was so cool, He even
said, for a while can you
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picture your mom
as a little tiny girl?
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I did I pictured her as a
3- year-old, because I had a
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little picture of a 3-
year-old and that was the only
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time my mom ever
looked normal to me.
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He said, can you honor
her then and forgive her for
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everything that will happen
to her in her life that will
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call certain not to be
able to love her children?
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I thought, oh man, oh man okay.
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So He's teaching me how to honor
your parents and how you do that
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I even called them up, it
was just amazing I really feel
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like asking God how to do
it and He started doing that.
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If anybody has ever felt
twisted, you are just inside.
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You know that I can dress it up.
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I can look normal.
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I can look healthy, but
inside I'm a mess, I'm a mess.
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As God started teaching
me I felt like the inside was
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becoming untwisted.
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Next Commandment, we
had honor father and mother,
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what is the next one?
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Thou shalt not kill!
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Thou shall not kill
that was easy for me.
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I thought about killing
people but I never actually
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killed people so I
thought that was an easy one.
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Then Jesus messed me up
because in the New Testament it
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says, I don't even want
you to be angry with someone.
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Oh stop, have You lived
down here, and He was like yes.
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And I was like oh
yeah, alright so we got that.
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Not only being angry but
deal with your what you allow
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your head to experience.
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It says you can be angry
about a situation that comes
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up, but don't let anger
or rage or definitely murder
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enter the picture.
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I was like, that
is a hard one for me.
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It took me years of
letting God deal with my anger
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stuff because I didn't
realize if I could kill a few
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people, I would.
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You know I would have
and I want to say that in
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a way, that I do not know if
I acknowledged that when I was
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first in recovery, but
God showed my heart in me and
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there was a few, you
know what I mean because
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I had this horrible life.
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I had to deal with that
when, the next one is what?
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Not commit adultery.
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Oh man not commit adultery
and I wasn't even married
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so I was easy on that
one, but He said don't even
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sleep with your
neighbor and I'm, like what?
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So okay and I'm thinking
don't even, and Christ took it
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even further and He said
don't even lust for someone.
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Don't even watch
somebody walked by and think
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about their body
parts as if they are not
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connected to a person.
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I'm thinking this is impossible.
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I remember looking at
the Ten Commandments one time
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and said, you know, this
is impossible, you know God.
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And I wanted somehow
for Him to explain to me,
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how do you do that?
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How do you do that, how
do you get to a place where
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you are so far out.
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Jeremiah talks about we
are so far out in our lust
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in our junk and our
sin that we don't even know
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how to blush anymore.
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We don't even know if
it's right or wrong anymore.
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I feel like I was
right there, I didn't know
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how to be pure.
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Even because of where
I came from that word was
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looked at as lame,
that's lame, that's not cool.
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If you look at any movie,
video game, if you look at
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what's been joked
about in comic books.
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When you look at somebody
that is pure, that person
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just looks lame, so to
me and my mind I looked at
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purity, or Holiness, or
going in that direction as
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not cool and being out
here and being this or that
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was hipper, or more enlightened.
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God just said
that is killing you.
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I wanted to say that out
loud over and over as many
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times as I can say, as a
society, as a people, as my
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friends, IT IS KILLING US.
00:11:03.49\00:11:05.58
We need to allow God to
take us back to a place where
00:11:05.61\00:11:09.71
I can say okay, but I am
so far from that place that
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You have to teach me.
00:11:13.84\00:11:15.00
I promise you I can't even,
there is nothing I can pull up
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in myself to even let
me know what that means.
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This is an example, I
was feeling like I was not
00:11:21.69\00:11:24.45
attractive and I had
been married for while.
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I was like God you
know I just want someone
00:11:27.62\00:11:30.68
to flirt with me.
00:11:30.72\00:11:31.86
God is like hello! I
can't do that for you.
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I remember thinking that
it was my birthday and I'm
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getting older and I
know my husband loves me,
00:11:39.87\00:11:42.90
but I just want someone
to flirt with me a little so
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I know that I'm still
cute [and you can send me an
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e- mail if you, no I'm kidding].
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I'm driving down the
street one day and I look up and
00:11:50.73\00:11:54.18
I see a billboard
that is huge, it's huge.
00:11:54.22\00:11:56.73
There is an insurance
guy and he is kind of cutie,
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and he is smiling,
looks like he is smiling at
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all the cars going by.
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I looked up and the Holy
Spirit said, is that good?
00:12:03.60\00:12:06.09
because that's
the best I can do?
00:12:06.13\00:12:08.63
I just wanted to crack
up that even God knows,
00:12:08.66\00:12:12.23
even in our healing that
we still has those draws that
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are pulling in stuff
that is not healthy for us.
00:12:17.14\00:12:20.89
For me, even asking God,
can You arrange this for me?
00:12:20.93\00:12:24.98
Because I am feeling insecure.
00:12:25.02\00:12:26.46
God is just saying
if you can get this one,
00:12:26.50\00:12:28.86
I promise you that I
will bring you to a place
00:12:28.90\00:12:31.81
where you can stand in
integrity as a woman and
00:12:31.85\00:12:35.21
just be at rest, at
peace in your own skin.
00:12:35.25\00:12:38.54
So I am thinking okay,
that when I do not understand
00:12:38.57\00:12:41.39
at all, and to this day,
He is still walking me through
00:12:41.42\00:12:44.21
that one, but
initially coming into recovery,
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I didn't know anything,
I really didn't know what
00:12:46.78\00:12:49.24
God was asking me.
00:12:49.27\00:12:50.56
What is really fun about
the Commandments, as I was
00:12:50.60\00:12:53.99
learning the Commandments,
is that He was just saying,
00:12:54.03\00:12:56.03
every single time that
you get any part of this,
00:12:56.06\00:12:58.42
every time you
figure out any of this,
00:12:58.45\00:12:59.98
you are going to
get some victory.
00:13:00.01\00:13:01.46
Okay the next one,
so we have adultery,
00:13:01.50\00:13:03.40
and the next one is?
00:13:03.44\00:13:04.47
Do not steal, don't even
let me go in your bathroom if
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I'm a guest because I
will be looking at your stuff.
00:13:08.36\00:13:12.22
I hate that, and raise
your hand if you know what
00:13:12.26\00:13:16.09
I am saying and be honest.
00:13:16.12\00:13:17.38
Okay so what really is
interesting with do not steal,
00:13:17.42\00:13:21.74
I have since I was
a little kid, stole.
00:13:21.78\00:13:26.58
My parents were addicts
and my friends were thieves.
00:13:26.61\00:13:29.75
When I was homeless we
were taught to do that and the
00:13:29.79\00:13:32.89
better you did that
the better you were.
00:13:32.93\00:13:35.87
I was groomed for
that and taught that and
00:13:35.90\00:13:38.81
I thought normal people weren't.
00:13:38.84\00:13:41.36
You just watch anybody do
their taxes, no I'm kidding,
00:13:41.39\00:13:45.55
no I am not kidding, we all
have that stuff at different
00:13:45.58\00:13:49.38
levels and God is saying
let me teach you about being
00:13:49.42\00:13:53.18
honest and not
stealing, and not taking.
00:13:53.22\00:13:55.97
Let the offering plate
go by without trying to take
00:13:56.01\00:13:59.24
something from it and
all that kind of stuff.
00:13:59.28\00:14:01.08
I'm like okay, but I don't
know how to do that one either.
00:14:01.11\00:14:05.51
It was real interesting
because my first reaction to
00:14:05.54\00:14:08.56
God was, I'm not a
thief, I don't steal.
00:14:08.59\00:14:11.09
He started to just pointing
out when I had the urge,
00:14:11.12\00:14:14.62
when in I wanted to, when I
actually looked at something
00:14:14.65\00:14:18.11
as if I could I would have it.
00:14:18.14\00:14:20.96
When I cheated on my taxes,
when I lied to Brad about,
00:14:20.99\00:14:24.98
my husband, what I spent
money on and all that kind
00:14:25.02\00:14:28.94
of stuff, so He just said let
Me show you that kind of thing.
00:14:28.97\00:14:32.61
I promise you that you
will get freedom stepping away
00:14:32.65\00:14:36.65
from that, what is the next one?
00:14:36.69\00:14:37.80
Steal - false witness.
00:14:37.84\00:14:39.95
Oh man, false witness
and don't talk about people
00:14:39.99\00:14:44.36
in a false way, don't
lie and I'm like, oh man.
00:14:44.39\00:14:48.28
I wish I could say to
the entire world, to anybody
00:14:48.32\00:14:52.17
watching us, have you ever lied?
00:14:52.21\00:14:55.08
And just have our hands
go up and God just saying,
00:14:55.12\00:14:59.03
I am going to
teach you to be honest.
00:14:59.06\00:15:02.44
To be trustworthy, to
have your word mean something.
00:15:02.47\00:15:05.93
I thought, just kill me
because I will never get that
00:15:05.97\00:15:09.64
one and God is so funny
because, He just so lovingly
00:15:09.67\00:15:12.99
He grabbed me on the face
and said, you'll get this one.
00:15:13.02\00:15:16.30
I will be faithful
to help you get there.
00:15:16.34\00:15:18.61
I'm like, but God and
God is saying I promise you.
00:15:18.64\00:15:24.90
What is the last
one there is one more?
00:15:24.93\00:15:27.18
Don't covet - don't covet.
00:15:27.21\00:15:29.64
Don't envy things
that other people have.
00:15:29.68\00:15:31.72
Don't covet their house,
their property, their wives,
00:15:31.76\00:15:36.20
their husbands, their
children, their pets and all
00:15:36.24\00:15:40.64
that kind of
stuff don't covet it.
00:15:40.68\00:15:41.74
I just started saying, God
You're going to have to do that.
00:15:41.78\00:15:45.19
My journey was that I
came into the church all messed
00:15:45.22\00:15:48.51
up and God said let Me
show you a standard, not that
00:15:48.55\00:15:51.58
you are going to feel
ever in your life that you will
00:15:51.62\00:15:54.49
meet this standard, but that
you and I are going to start
00:15:54.53\00:15:57.36
working on you and
you will be blessed.
00:15:57.40\00:16:00.34
And man I have been.
00:16:00.37\00:16:02.44
We are going to be talking
through this program about
00:16:02.48\00:16:05.53
God bringing us out of one
place, showing us something
00:16:05.57\00:16:08.49
so we can actually move on
to another place and I want
00:16:08.52\00:16:11.41
to be praying for you too!
00:16:11.44\00:16:12.52
To let Him show you that
and we will be right back.
00:16:12.55\00:16:15.32
Stay with us!
00:16:15.36\00:16:16.42