#S083 - “Married At First Sight” (Part 2) 00:00:03.43\00:00:06.74 Welcome to The Breath of Life 00:00:14.64\00:00:16.24 Television Ministries broadcast with Pastor Debleaire Snell. 00:00:16.28\00:00:20.72 In today's episode, 00:00:21.25\00:00:22.42 Pastor Snell will continue part two of the powerful message. 00:00:22.45\00:00:26.52 “Married At First Sight”. 00:00:27.26\00:00:29.06 Now let's go deeper into the word of God. 00:00:30.03\00:00:34.86 You ought to be thanking him that before 00:00:35.80\00:00:37.13 he sent the right person, he sent you to the right job 00:00:37.17\00:00:40.87 and gave you the right house and gave you the right income. 00:00:42.10\00:00:44.91 And then in the right order, he sends the right person 00:00:44.94\00:00:48.24 because they assumed that got the right person. 00:00:49.28\00:00:50.78 But they ain't got the right job. 00:00:51.58\00:00:52.75 They ain't got the right income. 00:00:52.78\00:00:54.52 And I would rather be single in the right house 00:00:54.55\00:00:56.95 than to have the right person sleeping in my car. 00:00:58.05\00:00:59.42 Y'all not hear what I'm saying today? 00:01:00.36\00:01:00.99 Church You need to thank God 00:01:01.02\00:01:03.29 that he has ordered every one of your steps. 00:01:04.23\00:01:06.16 And let me just pause while I'm here today. 00:01:07.13\00:01:08.80 Can I just say to anybody who's single, 00:01:09.73\00:01:11.07 watch your entanglements. 00:01:11.10\00:01:17.34 Because when you're entangled with the wrong person, 00:01:17.37\00:01:20.61 guess what? 00:01:21.38\00:01:22.54 You can't even notice the right person when they show up 00:01:22.58\00:01:25.11 and see. 00:01:25.95\00:01:26.75 The problem is there are some of us 00:01:26.78\00:01:28.02 that look, once we mature to a certain age 00:01:28.05\00:01:30.65 and we say, man, why couldn't I marry someone like him or her 00:01:31.89\00:01:34.66 when the truth is that person had already been in your orbit, 00:01:35.89\00:01:39.49 but you were so entangled with the wrong person 00:01:40.56\00:01:43.23 that you put 00:01:43.97\00:01:45.07 them in the friend zone and couldn't even identify them 00:01:45.10\00:01:47.80 and see. 00:01:48.94\00:01:49.90 One of the things I love about Rebecca Church 00:01:49.94\00:01:50.97 is that she is not here looking for nobody. 00:01:51.01\00:01:53.14 She's just out here living her life 00:01:53.17\00:01:55.28 and operating in her divine purpose. 00:01:55.31\00:01:57.71 See, the thing I like about Rebecca 00:01:58.58\00:02:00.08 is she ain't looking for nobody to complete her. 00:02:01.08\00:02:03.18 She ain't looking for nobody to save her. 00:02:03.22\00:02:05.72 She ain't looking for nobody to provide for her. 00:02:06.79\00:02:08.79 She ain't looking for nobody to make her complete. Why? 00:02:09.96\00:02:12.26 Because she is a daughter of God. 00:02:13.09\00:02:14.50 So that she is already made complete. 00:02:15.36\00:02:17.40 Because she has an active relationship with him. 00:02:18.47\00:02:21.24 In fact, let me let me say it as I share with you last year, 00:02:22.50\00:02:24.87 y'all remember old school 00:02:25.51\00:02:26.54 that when you went to a very cheap house party? 00:02:26.57\00:02:29.58 Malcolm The invitation was, say something like this BYOB. 00:02:29.61\00:02:34.08 Oh, y'all saved in this room today. 00:02:35.05\00:02:37.02 And the BYOB, it meant bring your own bag 00:02:37.05\00:02:40.42 or bring your own bottle. 00:02:41.06\00:02:42.59 In other words, 00:02:42.62\00:02:43.83 we ain't got enough to feed you, so you better bring your own. 00:02:43.86\00:02:46.66 And what I'm saying to anybody today is that 00:02:47.66\00:02:49.66 instead of waiting on somebody to make you happy, 00:02:49.70\00:02:52.73 instead of waiting on somebody to make you joyful, 00:02:52.77\00:02:55.87 I need you to be y0h and bring your own happiness. 00:02:56.97\00:03:01.18 I need you to be y oj and bring your own joy. 00:03:02.14\00:03:06.01 I need you to be y0p and bring your own peace. 00:03:07.05\00:03:10.52 And by0c and bring your own contentment. 00:03:11.39\00:03:15.02 And by0h bring your own hope. 00:03:15.72\00:03:18.56 And I need somebody to be y0m bring your own money. 00:03:19.69\00:03:22.46 Can I get a witness in this room today? 00:03:22.50\00:03:24.57 You don't need nobody to make you. 00:03:25.40\00:03:28.07 You need to bring it to the party. 00:03:28.90\00:03:30.41 All y'all hear me today 00:03:30.44\00:03:31.44 and see this a folks s in their feelings 00:03:32.41\00:03:34.44 because you've been waiting for your woman, a man 00:03:35.54\00:03:36.71 to make you happy. 00:03:36.75\00:03:38.25 You're putting too much pressure on a person. 00:03:38.28\00:03:41.72 How many of us know there is no person 00:03:42.62\00:03:44.89 that can make you happy? 00:03:45.59\00:03:48.06 There is no person that can make you joyful. 00:03:48.09\00:03:51.53 There is one source of joy. 00:03:51.56\00:03:54.36 And his name is J. 00:03:54.83\00:03:56.03 ESU ass. 00:03:56.06\00:03:58.50 Are you y'all here in the word today? 00:03:58.53\00:03:59.70 Church. 00:03:59.73\00:04:01.70 And so the word says to us here, Genesis, chapter 24 00:04:01.74\00:04:05.37 and verse number 18. 00:04:05.91\00:04:07.14 Look at it quickly here with me today, Genesis 24, in verse 18, 00:04:07.18\00:04:11.25 I just want to show a few south streets 00:04:11.28\00:04:13.31 and they're going to take you to Jesus and take my seat. 00:04:13.35\00:04:15.35 Genesis 24 in verse 18. 00:04:15.92\00:04:17.32 So she said, Drink, my lord. 00:04:17.35\00:04:19.45 Then she quickly led her pitcher 00:04:20.16\00:04:21.19 down to her hand and gave him a drink, 00:04:21.22\00:04:23.16 and when she had finished giving him a drink, 00:04:23.19\00:04:25.29 she said, I will draw water for your camels. 00:04:26.29\00:04:28.30 Also, until they have finished drinking. 00:04:28.33\00:04:32.30 The third thing, third thing this teaches us 00:04:33.30\00:04:34.60 is that spouse traits are global, not local. 00:04:35.60\00:04:38.74 Okay, let me say it again, 00:04:40.68\00:04:42.48 that spouse traits are global, not local. 00:04:42.51\00:04:45.95 So that sometimes one of the mistakes 00:04:46.85\00:04:48.05 we make young people 00:04:48.08\00:04:49.12 is that when we're looking or evaluating someone, 00:04:49.15\00:04:51.79 we just look at how they treat us. 00:04:52.62\00:04:54.76 But it's actually informative to notice 00:04:56.56\00:04:59.03 how they engage with the community around them. 00:05:00.10\00:05:02.93 Are you with me today? 00:05:03.50\00:05:04.17 In other words, brother, 00:05:04.20\00:05:05.17 you need to ask, is he just being kind to me? 00:05:05.20\00:05:07.80 Is the kindness just local or does it travel 00:05:08.80\00:05:11.24 outside of the orbit where I'm standing? 00:05:11.27\00:05:13.84 Did you notice this one thing about Rebecca Church that she is 00:05:15.08\00:05:17.48 just kind to everybody that she comes in contact with? 00:05:17.51\00:05:22.02 In other words, Rebecca is not putting on an audition 00:05:23.18\00:05:26.82 to win the affection of Isaac. 00:05:27.52\00:05:29.79 Rebecca is simply that girl that whenever she finds a need, 00:05:30.99\00:05:34.73 she pours herself all the way into it 00:05:35.63\00:05:37.63 so that she has no response ability to him 00:05:38.60\00:05:40.97 culturally or to the servant professionally 00:05:41.00\00:05:44.01 or to him from a financial standpoint. 00:05:44.91\00:05:47.71 She is just doing what she does 00:05:48.41\00:05:50.78 because kindness is inside of her. 00:05:51.61\00:05:53.85 And see, I need you to understand, Beloved, 00:05:55.42\00:05:57.29 that as you're looking and evaluating friends of mine, 00:05:57.32\00:06:00.42 you've got to ask yourself, is the kindness local to me 00:06:00.46\00:06:04.29 or is it global and are they a blessing to everybody? 00:06:05.43\00:06:07.66 Are y'all hear me today? Church? 00:06:07.73\00:06:09.40 In other words, it shouldn't just be. 00:06:09.43\00:06:10.97 How do they treat you? 00:06:11.00\00:06:12.50 You ought to be asking, do those characteristics travel 00:06:12.53\00:06:15.90 or are they just local? 00:06:16.47\00:06:17.54 When you're around? 00:06:17.57\00:06:19.24 In other words, brother, you ought to ask, 00:06:19.27\00:06:21.01 is she generally kind? 00:06:21.04\00:06:25.05 Because if she's just nice when you show up, 00:06:27.28\00:06:29.58 she that a really character is a kindness mask. 00:06:30.65\00:06:34.22 And how many of us know that mask always have to come off. 00:06:35.46\00:06:38.33 You need to ask, is he generally gentle 00:06:39.23\00:06:41.96 or is he just gentle when you show up? 00:06:42.86\00:06:44.90 Because the truth is, it may be a gentleness mask, 00:06:46.00\00:06:48.40 but gentleness always comes off mask always comes out. 00:06:49.50\00:06:52.21 You got to ask, are they just spiritual on Sabbath? 00:06:53.27\00:06:55.14 But if you run up 00:06:56.14\00:06:57.05 on Tuesday, on Thursday, 00:06:57.08\00:06:58.81 is there a completely different energy? 00:06:58.85\00:07:01.35 Is there spirituality, a mask or is it skin? 00:07:02.35\00:07:04.89 Are y'all hear me today? Church? 00:07:05.59\00:07:06.92 In other words, 00:07:06.96\00:07:07.86 if they 00:07:07.89\00:07:09.02 treat the waiter with respect, they won't treat a wife 00:07:09.06\00:07:12.66 with respect. 00:07:12.69\00:07:14.36 If she tears down others with their tongue, then guess what? 00:07:14.36\00:07:18.20 It's just a matter of time 00:07:18.83\00:07:19.90 for that same energy comes back in your direction. 00:07:19.93\00:07:22.07 If he lies to everybody else, guess what? 00:07:23.04\00:07:26.01 You're going to rest assured that he is lying to you. 00:07:26.04\00:07:29.04 In other words, if they are harsh 00:07:29.88\00:07:31.51 to everybody else, 00:07:31.55\00:07:32.71 in other words, 00:07:32.75\00:07:33.85 that harshness is going to come back in your direction. 00:07:33.88\00:07:36.45 If they are personally petty, they're 00:07:37.35\00:07:40.32 going to be relationally petty. 00:07:40.36\00:07:42.39 And you've got to get back 00:07:42.42\00:07:44.16 to recognizing that the character traits 00:07:44.19\00:07:47.20 are not just seeing in how they treat you, but 00:07:48.13\00:07:49.20 showing in how they treat everybody. 00:07:49.23\00:07:51.40 And can I just say to somebody who is single and waiting, 00:07:51.43\00:07:53.60 God measures your readiness, not just by how 00:07:53.64\00:07:57.11 are you going to treat the one you love. 00:07:57.14\00:08:00.38 He's saying whether or not you're ready 00:08:00.41\00:08:01.74 based on how you treat everybody around you, 00:08:01.78\00:08:04.25 how y'all not hear me today? 00:08:04.91\00:08:06.41 The audition doesn't start when the right person shows up. 00:08:06.45\00:08:09.95 God is seeing how you treat people 00:08:10.79\00:08:12.59 you don't need nothing from 00:08:12.62\00:08:15.02 and God saying, I can't trust you with a wife. 00:08:15.06\00:08:17.56 If I can trust you with the waitress, 00:08:17.59\00:08:20.23 I can't trust you with a husband. 00:08:20.26\00:08:22.93 If you don't know how to treat a stranger. 00:08:22.96\00:08:25.13 You see, the audition doesn't always take place on a stage. 00:08:25.17\00:08:28.50 It happens in the way 00:08:29.07\00:08:30.21 you interact with everybody you come in contact with. 00:08:30.24\00:08:33.24 How do you treat people that you don't know? 00:08:34.18\00:08:36.75 How do you treat people you don't need? 00:08:36.78\00:08:38.88 How many of us know that? 00:08:38.91\00:08:39.78 If you can't, you if you can't forgive 00:08:39.81\00:08:41.78 your enemies, you can't forgive your partner. 00:08:41.82\00:08:46.76 Because marriage is a constant 00:08:47.66\00:08:50.26 litany of having to forgive offenses 00:08:50.29\00:08:52.79 that you feel like should not be committed, though 00:08:52.83\00:08:54.46 you'll hear what I'm saying today. 00:08:54.50\00:08:55.46 CHURCH And see, this is why you got to 00:08:55.50\00:08:57.77 treat the community good. 00:08:57.80\00:08:59.43 Because before most people approach you, they research you 00:08:59.47\00:09:04.54 notice the servant. 00:09:07.91\00:09:08.71 He's noticed that she's beautiful, 00:09:08.74\00:09:10.28 but he's gathered some information along the way. 00:09:10.31\00:09:12.98 He's figured out who are people. 00:09:13.68\00:09:14.48 He's he knows that she's unmarried. 00:09:14.52\00:09:16.79 She no, he knows nobody ain't been with her. 00:09:17.79\00:09:19.09 In other words, he's done some asking around. 00:09:20.12\00:09:21.52 He ain't just praying. 00:09:22.09\00:09:22.82 He's in. He's interrogating. 00:09:22.86\00:09:24.93 And I need somebody to know that sometimes God's will 00:09:26.09\00:09:29.00 is confirmed in the consistency of testimony about you, 00:09:29.03\00:09:32.67 so that when people are asking around, they want to see if 00:09:33.90\00:09:36.44 everybody says the same thing 00:09:36.47\00:09:37.97 concerning you, the almighty quiet today. 00:09:38.01\00:09:40.14 In other words, God's will is confirmed 00:09:40.18\00:09:42.14 when everybody says He is a man of integrity, 00:09:42.18\00:09:45.68 God's will is confirmed when everybody says 00:09:46.61\00:09:48.25 that she has a servant disposition 00:09:49.08\00:09:50.52 and she handles her business in God's will is confirmed. 00:09:51.72\00:09:53.92 When everybody says that, Yeah, man, 00:09:54.79\00:09:56.46 I see him 00:09:56.49\00:09:57.29 the way he moves during the week 00:09:57.33\00:09:58.76 and he'll be a blessing to your life. 00:09:58.79\00:10:00.80 And how many of us know that everybody in this room 00:10:00.83\00:10:04.37 that at some point somebody is single, is researching you 00:10:05.60\00:10:08.34 and see sometimes they 00:10:09.80\00:10:11.17 ask in the usher, you turn your nose up at the door 00:10:11.21\00:10:14.54 and sometimes they are asking friends that that that janitor 00:10:15.81\00:10:19.58 that you look through every day on your way into your job 00:10:19.61\00:10:23.42 and see, that's why, friends, you want to make sure 00:10:24.55\00:10:26.35 that you treat everybody well because you never know 00:10:27.49\00:10:30.69 who's going to advocate for you, speak up for you 00:10:31.69\00:10:33.63 and say your name in rooms where you are not standing 00:10:34.73\00:10:37.13 here in the word today. 00:10:38.50\00:10:39.10 CHURCH 00:10:39.13\00:10:39.93 And so the word says here in verse number 16, stay with me. 00:10:41.17\00:10:43.54 CHURCH The Bible says here in Genesis 24 00:10:43.57\00:10:46.98 and verse number 16, hear the word of the Lord. 00:10:48.01\00:10:50.18 Notice what they notice the Bible says now. 00:10:51.11\00:10:52.98 The young woman was very beautiful to behold. 00:10:53.01\00:10:55.22 A virgin, and no man had known her. 00:10:55.25\00:10:58.49 And she went down to the well and filled her picture. 00:10:59.65\00:11:02.09 And the Bible says that she came up 00:11:02.12\00:11:04.26 for thing that this teaches us 00:11:04.29\00:11:05.99 is you got to make sure their history won't harm you. 00:11:06.03\00:11:09.56 Notice that the word is giving some detail 00:11:11.40\00:11:13.90 about what is being evaluated. 00:11:14.77\00:11:17.64 The word says is careful to point out that she is a virgin 00:11:18.87\00:11:21.31 and that no one has ever slept with her. 00:11:22.24\00:11:24.18 Now, to be clear, Church, every culture has a way, 00:11:25.28\00:11:26.98 specifically for some reason, 00:11:27.68\00:11:28.68 of acknowledging and celebrating a woman's virtue. 00:11:28.72\00:11:32.05 But I want to enlarge upon the principle 00:11:32.99\00:11:34.39 more than just the sexual, because understand that 00:11:34.42\00:11:37.86 the servant knows that Isaac is perhaps around 16 or 17, 00:11:38.99\00:11:43.00 that he is a young and inexperienced man, 00:11:43.93\00:11:46.53 and it makes sense to partner him with an inexperienced woman. 00:11:47.77\00:11:50.67 And the servant knows that no experience 00:11:51.61\00:11:53.81 is better than a bunch of bad experience. 00:11:54.78\00:11:57.15 Okay. 00:11:57.85\00:11:58.61 And the reason I'm 00:11:59.11\00:11:59.61 saying this church, 00:11:59.65\00:12:01.15 because, again, I'm not just talking about sexual experience, 00:12:01.18\00:12:03.62 I want to say this 00:12:04.12\00:12:05.19 because what has become culture common in the culture 00:12:05.22\00:12:09.16 is to just say, pastor, the past is the past. 00:12:10.13\00:12:13.43 And whatever happened in the past don't inform 00:12:14.36\00:12:17.30 nothing about what's going on with me. 00:12:17.33\00:12:20.30 But I am here to declare the devil is a liar. 00:12:21.24\00:12:24.91 I hear what I'm saying. 00:12:25.47\00:12:26.98 In other words, 00:12:27.01\00:12:28.21 I'm not saying that a person's history should disqualify them, 00:12:28.24\00:12:32.15 but what I rebuke is the welcoming of ignorance. 00:12:33.21\00:12:36.12 It is this 00:12:37.62\00:12:38.52 belief that everything in a person's past 00:12:38.55\00:12:41.39 automatically resets as soon as they connect with me. 00:12:42.46\00:12:46.66 But the truth is, friends, that if you're going to get serious 00:12:47.86\00:12:49.63 about somebody, you need to know their sexual history. 00:12:49.66\00:12:53.00 You ought to know their professional history. 00:12:54.04\00:12:55.60 You need to know their mental history. 00:12:56.50\00:12:58.04 You might even need to know their credit score. 00:12:59.11\00:13:00.78 Y'all not hear what I'm saying? 00:13:00.81\00:13:02.64 You need to know what's going on in that person's life. 00:13:02.68\00:13:06.35 In other words, you need to know why it is that 00:13:07.35\00:13:09.45 the last man she was with called it off. 00:13:09.48\00:13:12.62 So quickly, you need to understand why 00:13:13.52\00:13:15.86 he's been divorced three times in the last 20 years. 00:13:15.89\00:13:19.46 You need to find out 00:13:20.00\00:13:21.03 why he's been fired from every job he's ever had. 00:13:21.06\00:13:24.30 You need to make sure you understand their mental history 00:13:25.47\00:13:28.27 and their sexual history. 00:13:28.90\00:13:30.07 You need to know why they have more bodies in a cemetery. 00:13:30.11\00:13:32.91 He cannot keep it real in the House of the Lord today. 00:13:34.01\00:13:35.98 You need to know the credit score. 00:13:36.81\00:13:37.78 Can I get a witness out there? 00:13:37.81\00:13:39.48 You need to be clear. 00:13:39.51\00:13:40.48 If that score is in the threes, you ought to say 00:13:40.52\00:13:42.82 you can't be with me. 00:13:42.85\00:13:44.42 If it's in the fours, we can't date no more. 00:13:44.45\00:13:47.32 If it's in the fives, you knew that marazion alive. 00:13:48.46\00:13:50.86 And if it's under six, it might be a trick. 00:13:51.83\00:13:53.23 Now, not here with the Bass of the day. 00:13:53.26\00:13:54.96 In other words, you need to 00:13:56.03\00:13:57.37 understand their mental history. 00:13:57.40\00:14:01.20 Not now. 00:14:02.14\00:14:03.27 Again, I don't mean I don't want to be flippant about this. 00:14:03.30\00:14:05.27 I'm not saying if a person is depressed 00:14:06.11\00:14:07.58 or they struggle with bipolar disorder 00:14:08.48\00:14:09.81 that you ought to disqualify them. 00:14:10.65\00:14:11.95 But you need to enter into that knowing that you need to have 00:14:11.98\00:14:15.65 a plan of treatment together, because that heaviness 00:14:15.68\00:14:21.02 requires more than sentiment and a good prayer life. 00:14:22.16\00:14:24.59 I hear what I'm saying today. 00:14:25.29\00:14:25.96 Church and see friends of mine. 00:14:25.99\00:14:28.20 I need somebody to know 00:14:28.23\00:14:29.43 that you need to understand what happens in a person's history 00:14:29.46\00:14:32.73 because whatever is in their 00:14:33.40\00:14:34.34 history is going to impact your future. 00:14:34.37\00:14:37.87 It's crazy because I remember I was preaching in a certain 00:14:37.91\00:14:40.04 country. 00:14:40.34\00:14:41.18 Malcolm, and when I was getting ready 00:14:41.21\00:14:42.31 to come back home after a week 00:14:42.34\00:14:44.05 as I went into the airport with my luggage 00:14:44.08\00:14:46.51 and I put it on the counter, they did something strange. 00:14:47.72\00:14:49.78 They took my bag and they began to spray it with disinfectant. 00:14:49.82\00:14:54.76 And then they began to wrap it in this type plastic lining. 00:14:55.99\00:14:59.06 So they first disinfected it and then they wrapped it. 00:15:00.30\00:15:02.50 And I looked at them and asked them what they were doing. 00:15:03.63\00:15:05.07 They said, We've got to wrap 00:15:05.73\00:15:06.77 and disinfect your bag because we 00:15:06.80\00:15:08.87 don't want you to take back any strand of bacteria. 00:15:08.90\00:15:11.91 We don't want you to take back a flea or a tick 00:15:12.94\00:15:14.84 that might be harmful to anyone else. 00:15:15.74\00:15:17.28 And it seemed over the top, 00:15:17.95\00:15:19.11 and it seemed like they were doing too much. 00:15:19.15\00:15:21.18 And the man says something I'll never forget. 00:15:21.22\00:15:23.49 He says, never let. 00:15:24.02\00:15:24.85 What happened on your journey impact 00:15:24.89\00:15:27.22 those who didn't take that journey with you? 00:15:27.26\00:15:29.29 And see, this is my friends. 00:15:30.59\00:15:31.93 You've got to be careful 00:15:31.96\00:15:33.29 and take precautions because you can be harmed 00:15:33.33\00:15:36.13 by a journey you didn't even take 00:15:36.16\00:15:40.10 and see. 00:15:43.41\00:15:43.67 Friends. 00:15:43.71\00:15:44.37 The other component of history 00:15:44.41\00:15:45.47 is you got to make sure your histories match. 00:15:45.51\00:15:50.08 Okay. 00:15:50.11\00:15:50.81 In other words, you know Isaac, he's 00:15:51.68\00:15:53.55 a young, inexperienced man. 00:15:53.58\00:15:55.55 And so he needs to be matched generally with a young, 00:15:55.58\00:15:57.82 inexperienced woman. 00:15:58.35\00:15:59.25 Go with me today, church 00:15:59.29\00:16:00.79 and see when I talk about asking about history. 00:16:00.82\00:16:02.76 I'm not asking you to be nosy. 00:16:02.79\00:16:04.46 One of the things you need 00:16:04.49\00:16:05.36 to see is if your histories are congruent 00:16:05.39\00:16:08.80 with one another. 00:16:09.30\00:16:12.17 Okay, because sometimes brothers, 00:16:12.20\00:16:14.74 you tend to date a little younger 00:16:15.47\00:16:17.34 and sometimes your history might be too heavy for her. 00:16:17.37\00:16:22.31 So if you've been divorced and you got three kids 00:16:22.34\00:16:24.95 and she's just moving out of her mom's house, 00:16:25.91\00:16:27.45 your history may be a little bit too heavy for her to bear. 00:16:28.62\00:16:32.29 In other words, if you have lived a little bit 00:16:33.32\00:16:35.62 and you've got responsibilities 00:16:36.32\00:16:37.46 and you've gone through some challenges 00:16:37.49\00:16:39.19 and you're partnered with somebody 00:16:39.23\00:16:40.80 who is essentially an emotional virgin, 00:16:40.83\00:16:43.23 they don't have any scars on their soul. 00:16:44.17\00:16:45.50 Sometimes you've got to pay attention to it 00:16:46.50\00:16:47.67 because your history may be too heavy for them. 00:16:48.70\00:16:51.11 How many of us understand? 00:16:51.74\00:16:52.54 You need to understand the history 00:16:52.57\00:16:54.51 because not everybody has the internal structure of soul 00:16:54.54\00:16:58.75 to be in a blended family and not preaching the truth today 00:17:00.08\00:17:02.85 that it takes a real man to help raise some of the man's kids 00:17:04.05\00:17:07.86 and to step in the gap where that brother walked away. 00:17:08.96\00:17:11.59 It takes a special woman to raise kids that are not hers. 00:17:12.73\00:17:16.43 When that other woman walked out and she's still bringing drama 00:17:17.67\00:17:20.37 to the house, you need to know that they have what it takes 00:17:20.40\00:17:25.31 to handle the history so that I've even seen 00:17:26.31\00:17:29.04 that sometimes when a widow remarries, sometimes it helps 00:17:29.08\00:17:32.71 if they marry another widow, 00:17:33.38\00:17:34.72 somebody that has the structure of soul 00:17:34.75\00:17:37.19 to handle the history and the load that comes with, you 00:17:38.39\00:17:40.99 know what I'm saying today? 00:17:42.36\00:17:43.09 CHURCH And again, 00:17:43.12\00:17:44.23 I'm not saying that the history is bad, 00:17:44.26\00:17:46.03 but you got to make sure that those histories match 00:17:46.06\00:17:48.30 and there is 00:17:48.70\00:17:49.80 enough strength to carry what comes with that person, 00:17:49.83\00:17:51.83 this funny man. 00:17:52.93\00:17:53.40 You're my family. 00:17:53.44\00:17:54.34 My wife and I, we travel a lot 00:17:54.37\00:17:55.90 and I'm meeting a 16 year old in the shade. 00:17:55.94\00:17:57.67 But sometimes my wife packs 00:17:57.71\00:17:59.77 like she ain't never coming back home. 00:18:00.78\00:18:03.68 I mean. I mean. 00:18:03.71\00:18:04.61 I mean, pray for the pastor's afternoon. 00:18:04.65\00:18:06.48 Listen, there are days 00:18:06.51\00:18:07.78 when she'll go out of town for, like, a day and she'll pack 00:18:07.82\00:18:11.22 so much luggage, I'd be like, Baby, are we still together? 00:18:11.25\00:18:14.49 I mean, are you coming back home? 00:18:14.52\00:18:16.49 I'm like, Give me your hotel address. 00:18:16.52\00:18:18.46 I need to know where you going 00:18:18.49\00:18:20.10 in the event that you don't come back. 00:18:20.13\00:18:22.10 But but it's crazy. 00:18:22.13\00:18:23.37 Church Because sometimes when we are traveling are the kids. 00:18:23.40\00:18:27.64 Malcolm would try to assist us. 00:18:27.67\00:18:29.30 We carrying the bass 00:18:29.34\00:18:31.01 but the younger two, they are not really 00:18:31.04\00:18:33.11 used to carrying bands that are that heavy. 00:18:33.14\00:18:35.78 So most of the time I have to carry my wife's bags 00:18:36.88\00:18:39.71 because she needs somebody that's strong 00:18:40.65\00:18:42.78 enough to carry her baggage ordinance today. 00:18:42.82\00:18:45.82 She needs somebody that's strong enough to carry 00:18:46.89\00:18:49.62 what she's packing. 00:18:49.66\00:18:51.09 And when you are dating, you don't need a boy. 00:18:51.13\00:18:54.00 You need a man that can carry your baggage. 00:18:54.00\00:18:57.57 You don't need a girl. 00:18:58.13\00:18:59.10 That's just cute in a skirt. 00:18:59.13\00:19:01.14 You need a woman with enough character 00:19:01.17\00:19:03.47 to handle your baggage. 00:19:04.04\00:19:05.67 And when you ask the Lord, don't just ask for shoulders 00:19:05.71\00:19:09.41 and a complexion. 00:19:09.44\00:19:10.81 That's for somebody strong enough to carry the bags. 00:19:10.85\00:19:15.35 That's a part of your journey. 00:19:16.95\00:19:18.35 I hear me today. Church 00:19:18.39\00:19:20.99 And see, I just need to say this because it is a strange thing. 00:19:21.02\00:19:23.66 Verse 21 Notice that man, she meets all of the criteria 00:19:23.69\00:19:27.56 she ask him for a drink. 00:19:28.10\00:19:29.13 She feeds the camel. 00:19:29.16\00:19:30.70 She's pretty. 00:19:30.73\00:19:31.70 She's inexperienced, sexually. 00:19:31.73\00:19:33.47 But notice what verse 21, 00:19:33.50\00:19:34.97 the Bible says that the man takes time to be silent, 00:19:35.00\00:19:39.21 to see if this thing comes from God. 00:19:39.24\00:19:41.78 And I just want to encourage you, no matter how many signs 00:19:43.01\00:19:45.51 you see, you need to take time 00:19:45.55\00:19:47.48 for observation and deliberation. 00:19:47.52\00:19:49.98 See, friends of mine. 00:19:51.32\00:19:51.99 I need you to notice 00:19:52.02\00:19:53.15 that sometimes you don't need to just check your list. 00:19:53.19\00:19:56.32 You need to check in with Jehovah. 00:19:57.16\00:20:00.26 See, the problem is you go about this little, 00:20:00.30\00:20:02.46 this little fake list, you create it. 00:20:03.33\00:20:04.67 But you need to be still long 00:20:05.37\00:20:06.57 enough to know whether or not this thing is from God 00:20:06.60\00:20:09.97 and the reason you need to be still. 00:20:10.84\00:20:12.24 How many of us have ever got gassed up before? 00:20:12.27\00:20:15.41 Because the first few dates went so good? 00:20:16.38\00:20:18.65 You thought this had to be from God. 00:20:19.51\00:20:21.75 But once you let it breathe for a little bit, 00:20:22.78\00:20:24.95 once you let the infatuation wear off, once the Spirit of God 00:20:26.15\00:20:30.69 began to speak, sometimes the beginning can fool you. 00:20:30.73\00:20:34.83 So you need to be still long enough to see 00:20:36.00\00:20:38.70 if God is the one that is in the arranging process. 00:20:38.73\00:20:42.40 And this is why I would encourage all 00:20:43.24\00:20:44.84 who are of a marriageable age. 00:20:44.87\00:20:46.37 There is a very 00:20:46.41\00:20:48.04 wonderful formula that Ellen White gives us. 00:20:48.08\00:20:50.08 She says, You ought to have a long courtship 00:20:51.08\00:20:52.55 and a short engagement. 00:20:53.45\00:20:56.22 Okay, I can't get no help here today. 00:20:56.25\00:20:59.15 Do you realize 00:20:59.19\00:21:00.32 you don't just need to see how they look in jeans? 00:21:00.36\00:21:03.29 You need to see how they look in different seasons of life. 00:21:04.56\00:21:08.00 You need to see them when they. Man, can I. 00:21:08.03\00:21:10.03 Can I get a witness out there? 00:21:10.07\00:21:11.47 You need to see them when they sleep. 00:21:11.50\00:21:13.50 You need to see them when they hungry. 00:21:13.54\00:21:15.44 You need to see them 00:21:15.47\00:21:16.54 when they ain't got no money. You need to see them 00:21:16.57\00:21:18.87 when they are around their family. 00:21:18.91\00:21:21.04 Oh, you better evaluate their family life. 00:21:21.94\00:21:24.35 They all like, Oh, I'm just marrying them. 00:21:25.31\00:21:26.75 Ain't marrying that devil is a liar. 00:21:26.78\00:21:29.45 You better see what you marrying into a young 00:21:30.39\00:21:33.25 hearing The Bachelor this afternoon. 00:21:33.29\00:21:36.32 And so you need to take some time 00:21:36.36\00:21:38.79 so that your desire and your emotion 00:21:39.66\00:21:42.80 and the charm does not deceive you. 00:21:43.67\00:21:46.77 And see some of us like, yo, you got to be careful 00:21:46.80\00:21:49.04 when somebody's going to get married too quick, 00:21:50.04\00:21:51.21 because really, when they want to rush you to the altar, 00:21:51.24\00:21:53.74 they want to get you there before the real them comes out 00:21:54.94\00:21:56.75 because they get on the way. 00:21:59.61\00:22:00.45 That man so long am I preach 00:22:00.48\00:22:02.05 anybody that in other words, I need to lock him or her up 00:22:02.08\00:22:06.22 before they see my temper, my temperament, 00:22:07.19\00:22:09.39 my bank account, my attitude, my ugly? 00:22:10.29\00:22:12.53 You want to see it all 00:22:13.09\00:22:16.23 and see? 00:22:16.53\00:22:17.43 That's the one thing I say all the time. 00:22:17.47\00:22:18.63 We worried about men. 00:22:18.67\00:22:19.43 If I wait too long a miss love 00:22:19.47\00:22:21.50 you realize time can mess up love 00:22:22.34\00:22:23.71 you mean if you are going to be married 00:22:25.21\00:22:26.31 for the next 65 years, you can wait two more months. 00:22:26.34\00:22:28.84 How y'all hear what I'm saying today? 00:22:28.88\00:22:30.05 Church The only thing that time kills is infatuation. 00:22:30.08\00:22:34.02 So you need to, no matter how many of the boxes it checks, 00:22:35.18\00:22:37.39 no matter how well it goes 00:22:38.02\00:22:39.22 for the first three months, 00:22:39.25\00:22:40.12 you still need to be still long enough 00:22:40.16\00:22:42.59 to see whether or not this thing comes from the Lord. 00:22:43.69\00:22:46.39 Are y'all with me today? Church 00:22:46.43\00:22:47.66 And so this is for the strange to us. 00:22:48.66\00:22:50.33 We don't really like celebrate because it seems strange to me 00:22:50.37\00:22:53.74 since somebody's a servant to find the wife for his son. 00:22:54.94\00:22:57.77 And then guess what? 00:22:58.31\00:22:58.84 He persuades her to come 00:22:58.87\00:23:00.98 and she gets on a donkey and she comes voluntarily, 00:23:01.01\00:23:04.55 leaves everything that she knows. 00:23:05.35\00:23:06.98 And when she sees him for the very first time, 00:23:07.95\00:23:10.92 she marries him. 00:23:11.92\00:23:14.26 At first sight. 00:23:14.29\00:23:18.06 And I thought about this thought the pilot, 00:23:18.09\00:23:20.63 and I thought to myself 00:23:20.66\00:23:23.23 that as Adventists 00:23:23.26\00:23:25.33 we are to believe in arranged marriages. 00:23:25.37\00:23:33.44 Now, when I say happiness, 00:23:33.48\00:23:34.51 I don't mean just SDR, but anybody that believes 00:23:34.54\00:23:37.08 that Jesus is coming again, you are to believe 00:23:38.11\00:23:41.72 in arranged marriages. 00:23:41.75\00:23:42.82 Let me say it again to y'all in the back 00:23:42.85\00:23:44.79 that if you believe that Jesus is coming again, 00:23:44.82\00:23:49.66 you ought to believe Mark in arranged marriages. 00:23:49.69\00:23:53.96 Now, see, the problem is some of us hadn't seen Jesus yet, 00:23:55.10\00:23:58.40 so see, we man, because all we see is a father 00:23:59.43\00:24:02.34 setting up a wedding for his son. 00:24:03.14\00:24:05.44 And he sends the helper to convince the bride 00:24:06.41\00:24:10.21 to come and marry a man that she's seeing for the first time. 00:24:11.41\00:24:15.02 Y'all still missed it. 00:24:15.05\00:24:16.52 See all y'all see as a father 00:24:16.55\00:24:18.59 arranging a marriage for his son and then sending a helper 00:24:19.75\00:24:23.66 to convince the bride to come 00:24:24.36\00:24:26.83 and marry a man that she see for the very first time. 00:24:26.86\00:24:30.97 Some of are the getting it to all. 00:24:31.00\00:24:33.07 Some see as a father that's preparing a wedding for the son. 00:24:33.10\00:24:38.31 So he sends a helper to convince the bride 00:24:38.34\00:24:42.64 to marry a man that she ain't never seen. 00:24:43.58\00:24:46.55 See all somebody sees as a father, 00:24:47.38\00:24:49.35 a son and a helper. 00:24:50.02\00:24:52.42 But if you study your Bible, 00:24:53.09\00:24:55.52 you don't just see a father, a son and a helper. 00:24:55.56\00:25:00.50 I see the father, 00:25:00.96\00:25:02.40 the Son and the Holy Ghost 00:25:03.40\00:25:06.40 because my father is 00:25:07.10\00:25:09.64 preparing a wedding for his son. 00:25:09.67\00:25:12.14 And so he sends the helper, 00:25:12.81\00:25:15.14 which is the Holy Ghost, to convince the bride, 00:25:16.11\00:25:19.75 which is the church, to come to the wedding piece 00:25:20.82\00:25:24.29 that's being prepared for his son. 00:25:25.12\00:25:27.59 And you're saying, Well, I know Jesus, but 00:25:27.62\00:25:30.69 the Bible says I have a thing is have not heard me 00:25:30.73\00:25:35.93 that has entered into the heart of any man, 00:25:36.90\00:25:38.20 that which God has prepared for his children. 00:25:39.23\00:25:41.10 And so the good news is that he got down on both knees 00:25:42.27\00:25:45.67 and proposed in the Garden of Gethsemane, 00:25:46.61\00:25:48.31 that he walked down the aisle on the way to Golgotha, 00:25:49.48\00:25:52.88 that he took his vows by not saying a word. 00:25:53.88\00:25:56.99 He didn't just stand before the altar, 00:25:57.89\00:25:59.55 but he lay down on the altar and it was there 00:26:00.62\00:26:03.39 at the cross that he wed himself to the church. 00:26:03.43\00:26:06.63 And he says, I'll take you 00:26:07.23\00:26:08.86 to I have and to 00:26:09.83\00:26:10.97 hope for good times and in bad times, 00:26:11.00\00:26:14.34 in sickness and in health, for richer and for poor. 00:26:15.44\00:26:18.94 And because he was raised, 00:26:19.57\00:26:21.48 death will never do your part. 00:26:22.18\00:26:24.21 Anybody thankful that the Holy Ghost 00:26:25.21\00:26:27.55 led you to the Sun so you can be a 00:26:28.38\00:26:31.52 part of the wedding feast that's about to take place? 00:26:31.55\00:26:35.66 Can you praise him that he's coming again? 00:26:35.69\00:26:39.26 That a wedding is being prepared? 00:26:40.03\00:26:42.00 He's preparing a place where you lift up 00:26:42.93\00:26:45.77 the trumpets loud ladies sing. 00:26:45.80\00:26:48.64 Jesus is coming again 00:26:49.30\00:26:51.84 be cheer up, you pilgrims be joyful and sing 00:26:52.77\00:26:56.14 Because Jesus, I said, My Jesus, 00:26:56.85\00:27:00.78 I said, you're Jesus. 00:27:01.75\00:27:04.62 I said, Our Jesus is here. 00:27:04.65\00:27:08.16 Jesus 00:27:08.19\00:27:09.56 is the bride getting ready? 00:27:10.23\00:27:12.56 Are you getting ready for the wedding, Chris? 00:27:12.59\00:27:14.73 Are you looking forward to your wedding day? 00:27:15.66\00:27:18.17 Are you making yourself ready? 00:27:18.20\00:27:20.57 I'm thankful that Jesus is coming. 00:27:20.60\00:27:25.44 He's coming again. 00:27:26.27\00:27:28.54 Take 10 seconds and give him praise. 00:27:28.58\00:27:32.81 Hallelujah, 00:27:32.85\00:27:34.15 hallelujah, hallelujah. 00:27:35.18\00:27:38.19 To the Lamb 00:27:38.22\00:27:39.89