- Something I saw on social media a while ago 00:00:01.03\00:00:03.26 suddenly blew up into this massive controversy, 00:00:03.26\00:00:06.77 and you'll never guess what it was. 00:00:06.77\00:00:08.74 Today on "Authentic" 00:00:08.74\00:00:10.24 I'm going to tell you what I learned from the mole man. 00:00:10.24\00:00:12.91 [mellow instrumental music] 00:00:12.91\00:00:16.64 A little while ago, 00:00:33.93\00:00:34.86 I stumbled onto this debate 00:00:34.86\00:00:36.13 on social media that kept my attention 00:00:36.13\00:00:38.37 for way longer than it should have. 00:00:38.37\00:00:41.10 It first showed up on another forum, 00:00:41.10\00:00:43.30 but of course somebody took a screenshot 00:00:43.30\00:00:45.31 and shared it with the whole world, 00:00:45.31\00:00:47.41 such is the nature of the internet. 00:00:47.41\00:00:49.44 It was a heartbroken plea from a woman 00:00:49.44\00:00:51.51 whose boyfriend was doing something 00:00:51.51\00:00:53.85 she didn't care for. 00:00:53.85\00:00:55.38 And while I'm tempted to summarize 00:00:55.38\00:00:57.22 this for the sake of expediency, 00:00:57.22\00:00:59.15 I think the only way to accurately 00:00:59.15\00:01:00.69 convey the sense of it, 00:01:00.69\00:01:02.29 is to just read it to you, so here we go. 00:01:02.29\00:01:04.99 I believe this was dated sometime in April of 2022. 00:01:04.99\00:01:08.86 It says, "So I know this is a weird question, 00:01:08.86\00:01:11.47 "but my boyfriend likes to spend a lot of his free time 00:01:11.47\00:01:13.94 "digging a tunnel on some property that he inherited. 00:01:13.94\00:01:17.11 "I haven't seen the full extent of it, 00:01:17.11\00:01:18.67 "but last I saw it was remarkably 00:01:18.67\00:01:20.58 "deep under the surface. 00:01:20.58\00:01:22.21 "He spent roughly a year on it, and it's evident. 00:01:22.21\00:01:25.51 "The front of the thing is deep, wide, well put together. 00:01:25.51\00:01:28.42 "At the front, which is the only part I've seen, 00:01:28.42\00:01:30.75 "he's got cement beams, electric lights, 00:01:30.75\00:01:32.85 "even chairs and a small table. 00:01:32.85\00:01:34.82 "I haven't gone into it, 00:01:34.82\00:01:36.39 "but it looks like the quality 00:01:36.39\00:01:37.69 "severely dropped as the tunnel went further, 00:01:37.69\00:01:40.30 "mostly becoming open dirt with some wood beams 00:01:40.30\00:01:42.80 "holding it up. 00:01:42.80\00:01:44.27 "My biggest concern is his safety. 00:01:44.27\00:01:46.40 "I'm really worried that he's going to dig too deep, 00:01:46.40\00:01:48.60 "and it'll collapse on him or something. 00:01:48.60\00:01:50.87 "I've tried voicing this concern to him, 00:01:50.87\00:01:52.77 "but he just laughs it off 00:01:52.77\00:01:54.01 "and assures me that he'll be fine. 00:01:54.01\00:01:56.18 "Aside from safety concerns, 00:01:56.18\00:01:57.58 "there's also the fact that 00:01:57.58\00:01:58.85 "he doesn't really have a social life, 00:01:58.85\00:02:00.32 "because of this thing. 00:02:00.32\00:02:01.82 "I'm pretty much the only person 00:02:01.82\00:02:03.12 "he still talks to outside of his job, 00:02:03.12\00:02:05.09 "and he doesn't go out and do anything anymore. 00:02:05.09\00:02:07.76 "It used to be that he'd occasionally head out 00:02:07.76\00:02:09.72 "and do some digging on the weekends, 00:02:09.72\00:02:11.49 "but now he spends almost all of his free time out there. 00:02:11.49\00:02:14.83 "He still comes home, 00:02:14.83\00:02:16.23 "but he barely spends any time with me. 00:02:16.23\00:02:18.60 "And I know that he isn't doing anything, 00:02:18.60\00:02:20.27 "but digging that darn hole in the ground. 00:02:20.27\00:02:22.64 "This can't be good for his mental health, 00:02:22.64\00:02:24.91 "but I don't know how to convince him to stop." 00:02:24.91\00:02:27.78 And now comes the kicker. 00:02:27.78\00:02:29.61 "He's always really happy when he comes back from digging, 00:02:29.61\00:02:32.45 "which is why I haven't seriously tried to stop him 00:02:32.45\00:02:35.58 before. "But I was talking to a friend about him, 00:02:35.58\00:02:37.29 "and she told me he might be going crazy. 00:02:37.29\00:02:39.69 "Obviously, I don't think he's insane, 00:02:39.69\00:02:41.56 "but I hadn't considered the mental health aspect of this, 00:02:41.56\00:02:44.53 "and I just don't know what to do." 00:02:44.53\00:02:47.83 Now, this is not the kind of thing 00:02:47.83\00:02:49.50 I'd normally waste my time on, 00:02:49.50\00:02:51.23 but you have to admit, 00:02:51.23\00:02:52.83 this kind of stirs your imagination. 00:02:52.83\00:02:54.50 I mean, what in the world is that boyfriend looking for? 00:02:54.50\00:02:57.97 Does he think there's something valuable under the property? 00:02:57.97\00:03:00.71 Is he some kind of a prepper, 00:03:00.71\00:03:02.11 digging himself a shelter, 00:03:02.11\00:03:03.58 so he can survive the collapse of civilization? 00:03:03.58\00:03:06.82 Or is there a possibility, 00:03:06.82\00:03:08.92 and I know this isn't nice, 00:03:08.92\00:03:10.52 but I also know this absolutely 00:03:10.52\00:03:12.29 popped into some of your heads, 00:03:12.29\00:03:14.19 is there a possibility 00:03:14.19\00:03:15.66 that he's out there digging that tunnel 00:03:15.66\00:03:17.56 just to get away from her? 00:03:17.56\00:03:19.73 [chuckles] Got to wonder. 00:03:19.73\00:03:21.43 You know what my first reaction was? 00:03:21.43\00:03:23.16 "I wish I had a tunnel I could work on," 00:03:23.16\00:03:25.40 and not because I need to get away from my wife. 00:03:25.40\00:03:27.40 In fact, I hit the jackpot in the wife department. 00:03:27.40\00:03:30.81 But there's just something 00:03:30.81\00:03:32.21 really appealing about what that guy was doing. 00:03:32.21\00:03:35.24 It doesn't really matter 00:03:35.24\00:03:36.71 if the tunnel actually goes anywhere, 00:03:36.71\00:03:38.75 or if it serves any kind of practical purpose. 00:03:38.75\00:03:40.92 The joy is in the digging. 00:03:40.92\00:03:43.82 And while some of you are 00:03:43.82\00:03:44.99 going to wonder about my sanity today, 00:03:44.99\00:03:47.16 some of you understand what I'm talking about. 00:03:47.16\00:03:50.43 Not too far down the gargantuan thread of posts 00:03:50.43\00:03:53.13 that followed that one, 00:03:53.13\00:03:54.76 somebody inserted a cartoon with two women talking. 00:03:54.76\00:03:57.80 One says to the other, 00:03:57.80\00:03:59.10 "My boyfriend won't stop digging his tunnel." 00:03:59.10\00:04:01.70 And her friend replies, "Boys are weird." 00:04:01.70\00:04:04.54 But then in the next panel there are two men, 00:04:04.54\00:04:06.94 and one asks the other, "You wanna dig?" 00:04:06.94\00:04:09.04 And his friend says, "Yes," exclamation point. 00:04:09.04\00:04:12.21 It made me laugh, 00:04:12.21\00:04:13.72 because I'm absolutely the friend who says, "Yes!" 00:04:13.72\00:04:17.19 Now what I'm going to say is a little simplistic. 00:04:17.19\00:04:20.09 It's a massive generalization, 00:04:20.09\00:04:22.62 but this whole thing does illustrate a fundamental 00:04:22.62\00:04:25.83 difference between the way sexes tend to think about life. 00:04:25.83\00:04:29.83 For thousands of years, 00:04:29.83\00:04:31.47 [light instrumental music] men have scratched their heads 00:04:31.47\00:04:32.67 trying to figure out how women think, 00:04:32.67\00:04:34.70 and for thousands of years, 00:04:34.70\00:04:36.20 women have been doing the same thing 00:04:36.20\00:04:37.94 in the other direction. 00:04:37.94\00:04:39.71 And I realize we can find 00:04:39.71\00:04:40.98 lots of overlap between the sexes 00:04:40.98\00:04:43.11 and clear exceptions to the rule, 00:04:43.11\00:04:45.18 when we examine the whole population, 00:04:45.18\00:04:47.38 so don't write me letters. 00:04:47.38\00:04:49.32 But, for the most part, 00:04:49.32\00:04:50.89 there are definite trends, 00:04:50.89\00:04:52.82 and the evident differences between the sexes 00:04:52.82\00:04:55.12 have been a nonstop source of frustration 00:04:55.12\00:04:58.26 and entertainment on both sides of the fence. 00:04:58.26\00:05:02.13 I mean, I've been living with Jean 00:05:02.13\00:05:03.37 for about three decades now, 00:05:03.37\00:05:05.00 so I can pretty much predict 00:05:05.00\00:05:06.67 what she's going to do 00:05:06.67\00:05:07.80 under any given circumstance. 00:05:07.80\00:05:09.77 I know my wife's bedtime routine 00:05:09.77\00:05:11.97 like the back of my hand. 00:05:11.97\00:05:13.54 It involves no less than 20 separate activities, 00:05:13.54\00:05:17.05 and she always does all of them in exactly 00:05:17.05\00:05:19.71 the same order every single night. 00:05:19.71\00:05:22.25 I know exactly what she's going to do 00:05:22.25\00:05:24.22 and when she's going to do it, 00:05:24.22\00:05:26.02 but I've got to tell you this. 00:05:26.02\00:05:27.96 To this day, I have no idea why. 00:05:27.96\00:05:31.36 All of it makes perfect sense to her, but not to me. 00:05:31.36\00:05:35.16 As you can imagine, the thread below 00:05:35.16\00:05:37.07 this lady's post exploded with comments, 00:05:37.07\00:05:39.53 because I'm not the only one 00:05:39.53\00:05:41.07 who found this subject irresistible, 00:05:41.07\00:05:44.51 and for the most part, the responses were predictable. 00:05:44.51\00:05:47.71 Most of the women condemned the tunnel 00:05:47.71\00:05:50.08 and sympathized with the girlfriend, 00:05:50.08\00:05:51.91 not all of them, but most of them. 00:05:51.91\00:05:54.28 A handful simply said, 00:05:54.28\00:05:55.55 "If he's coming home happy all the time, 00:05:55.55\00:05:57.32 "what's wrong with that?" 00:05:57.32\00:05:59.42 Now most of the men 00:05:59.42\00:06:00.76 were decidedly in favor of the tunnel. 00:06:00.76\00:06:03.16 Reminding us that for men, 00:06:03.16\00:06:05.03 physical work is therapy. 00:06:05.03\00:06:07.40 Most of us don't want to sit in a circle 00:06:07.40\00:06:09.40 and share our feelings, 00:06:09.40\00:06:10.67 or bear our souls to another human being. 00:06:10.67\00:06:13.40 I know that some of you are convinced 00:06:13.40\00:06:14.97 that men would like it if we tried, 00:06:14.97\00:06:17.11 but I can assure you we do not. 00:06:17.11\00:06:20.01 Not everybody deals with problems the same way. 00:06:20.01\00:06:23.18 For example, 00:06:24.01\00:06:25.68 in the winter when I'm really frustrated about something, 00:06:25.68\00:06:28.78 I like to go outside and shovel snow. 00:06:28.78\00:06:31.12 Sometimes I'll even move a pile of heavy wet snow 00:06:31.12\00:06:34.09 just a few feet, because there's something about 00:06:34.09\00:06:37.39 being physically active and doing orderly routine work 00:06:37.39\00:06:41.10 that helps you make sense out of your thoughts. 00:06:41.10\00:06:44.33 This is likely the reason 00:06:44.33\00:06:45.57 I like to read books when I'm walking, 00:06:45.57\00:06:47.30 which is something I discovered the founder of this show, 00:06:47.30\00:06:49.87 the "Voice of Prophecy" also did. 00:06:49.87\00:06:52.67 It takes a little practice to master walking and reading, 00:06:52.67\00:06:55.44 and I'd advise a great deal of caution 00:06:55.44\00:06:57.48 if you're going to do it. 00:06:57.48\00:06:58.75 But I love it, 00:06:58.75\00:07:00.32 because when I'm active and my blood gets pumping, 00:07:00.32\00:07:02.12 my thoughts become sharper 00:07:02.12\00:07:04.49 and better organized. 00:07:04.49\00:07:06.52 Now, for the most part, 00:07:06.52\00:07:07.92 I find that social media threads are a waste of my time, 00:07:07.92\00:07:10.99 and they're largely a festival of uninformed opinions. 00:07:10.99\00:07:14.46 But sometimes all of those throwaway comments you find 00:07:14.46\00:07:17.47 under a post begin to reveal something true 00:07:17.47\00:07:20.54 about human nature. 00:07:20.54\00:07:22.54 One of the respondents suggested 00:07:22.54\00:07:24.21 that men have a deep need to control their environment, 00:07:24.21\00:07:27.64 and personal experience suggests to me that he's right. 00:07:27.64\00:07:31.61 And when we can't control our environment, 00:07:31.61\00:07:33.45 we'll naturally go find something we can control, 00:07:33.45\00:07:36.22 so that we can begin to find order in the midst of chaos. 00:07:36.22\00:07:40.26 The same is true for many women, as my wife pointed out, 00:07:40.26\00:07:42.82 and she puts knitting in that category. 00:07:42.82\00:07:45.79 It's a somewhat mindless activity, 00:07:45.79\00:07:47.76 but it's systematic. 00:07:47.76\00:07:49.00 So it gives a troubled mind 00:07:49.00\00:07:50.43 a much needed sense of order. 00:07:50.43\00:07:52.33 [gentle music] And as soon as I return 00:07:52.33\00:07:53.97 from the chaos of a really quick break, 00:07:53.97\00:07:56.04 I'll tell you something surprising and useful 00:07:56.04\00:07:59.14 about post-traumatic stress disorder 00:07:59.14\00:08:01.54 and a video game I'm guessing you've played at some point. 00:08:01.54\00:08:04.75 [light instrumental music] 00:08:04.75\00:08:06.68 [bright reflective music] 00:08:06.68\00:08:08.92 - [Announcer] Are you searching for answers 00:08:08.92\00:08:10.25 to life's toughest questions, like, 00:08:10.25\00:08:12.65 "Where is God when we suffer? 00:08:12.65\00:08:14.62 "Can I find real happiness? 00:08:14.62\00:08:16.79 "Does my life really matter to God? 00:08:16.79\00:08:19.33 "Or is there any hope for our chaotic world?" 00:08:19.33\00:08:22.53 The Discover Bible Guides will help you 00:08:22.53\00:08:24.73 find the answers that you're looking for. 00:08:24.73\00:08:27.37 Visit us at biblestudies.com 00:08:27.37\00:08:29.60 or give us a call at 888-456-7933 00:08:29.60\00:08:32.74 for your free Discover Bible Guides. 00:08:34.84\00:08:37.55 Study online on our secure website 00:08:37.55\00:08:39.95 or have the free guides mailed right to your home. 00:08:39.95\00:08:42.88 There is never a cost or obligation. 00:08:42.88\00:08:45.49 The Discover Bible Guides are our free gift to you. 00:08:45.49\00:08:49.19 Find answers and guides like 00:08:49.19\00:08:50.99 "A Second Chance at Life". 00:08:50.99\00:08:53.33 You'll find answers to the things 00:08:53.33\00:08:54.83 that matter the most to you. 00:08:54.83\00:08:57.23 Visit biblestudies.com and begin your journey today 00:08:57.23\00:09:00.94 to discover answers to life's deepest questions. 00:09:00.94\00:09:04.47 - Two-thousand years ago, 00:09:07.08\00:09:08.34 the Roman statesman and luminary Seneca 00:09:08.34\00:09:10.88 wrote to his mother about the incredibly 00:09:10.88\00:09:13.18 stressful events she'd been going through. 00:09:13.18\00:09:15.52 He didn't write to her right away, he said, 00:09:15.52\00:09:17.12 "Because sometimes discussing trauma too early 00:09:17.12\00:09:20.69 "only makes things worse." 00:09:20.69\00:09:22.46 Here's what he wrote. 00:09:22.46\00:09:23.93 "I realized that your grief 00:09:23.93\00:09:25.69 "should not be intruded upon 00:09:25.69\00:09:27.03 "while it was fresh and agonizing, 00:09:27.03\00:09:29.06 "in the case the consolation themselves 00:09:29.06\00:09:31.43 "should rouse and inflame it. 00:09:31.43\00:09:33.64 "For an illness too, 00:09:33.64\00:09:35.24 "nothing is more harmful than premature treatment. 00:09:35.24\00:09:38.54 "So I was waiting until your grief 00:09:38.54\00:09:40.11 "of itself should lose its force, 00:09:40.11\00:09:42.14 "and being softened by time to endure remedies, 00:09:42.14\00:09:45.45 "it would allow itself to be touched and handled." 00:09:45.45\00:09:49.08 You know, if you think about it, he kind of has a point. 00:09:49.08\00:09:51.75 When something really devastating happens, 00:09:51.75\00:09:54.26 at least for me, the last thing 00:09:54.26\00:09:56.32 I want to do is talk about it. 00:09:56.32\00:09:58.73 In fact, I often find myself 00:09:58.73\00:10:00.73 turning down phone calls from people 00:10:00.73\00:10:02.30 who really just want to help me feel better. 00:10:02.30\00:10:04.33 I mean, I know they mean well, 00:10:04.33\00:10:06.27 but discussing the problem 00:10:06.27\00:10:08.30 with somebody when it's really fresh, 00:10:08.30\00:10:09.97 is sometimes a frustrating exercise, 00:10:09.97\00:10:12.21 because I haven't had time to sort things out in my head. 00:10:12.21\00:10:15.58 [light dramatic music] One of the problems with 00:10:15.58\00:10:17.48 traumatic events is that your brain 00:10:17.48\00:10:19.31 just doesn't know where to file the information, 00:10:19.31\00:10:22.35 and so you find it haunting your thoughts day after day, 00:10:22.35\00:10:25.39 hour after hour on an endless feedback loop 00:10:25.39\00:10:28.82 that can really start to torture you. 00:10:28.82\00:10:31.29 And when somebody wants to talk 00:10:31.29\00:10:32.86 in the earliest moments of your torment, 00:10:32.86\00:10:35.36 it doesn't usually help. 00:10:35.36\00:10:37.60 I'm not saying it doesn't help anybody, 00:10:37.60\00:10:39.47 but it certainly doesn't help me. 00:10:39.47\00:10:41.47 And I'm guessing that's also true for a lot of you. 00:10:41.47\00:10:44.44 Ask me again in a couple of months, 00:10:44.44\00:10:46.01 and chances are I'll be far more ready to talk, 00:10:46.01\00:10:48.54 because by then I'll have figured out 00:10:48.54\00:10:50.91 where to file the information, 00:10:50.91\00:10:52.55 and now it's organized. 00:10:52.55\00:10:54.95 Now I don't really know this guy, 00:10:54.95\00:10:56.48 but I'm guessing that it's at least part of the reason 00:10:56.48\00:10:59.32 that mole man is down there underground excavating a tunnel. 00:10:59.32\00:11:02.96 It's a way of organizing your thoughts even though the dirt 00:11:02.96\00:11:06.03 and the shovel might be unrelated to the problems 00:11:06.03\00:11:08.46 you're actually thinking about. 00:11:08.46\00:11:10.57 Back in 2017, 00:11:10.57\00:11:12.43 a group of researchers from the UK and Sweden 00:11:12.43\00:11:15.34 discovered something really interesting 00:11:15.34\00:11:16.91 about traumatic events. 00:11:16.91\00:11:18.81 When victims of a car accident 00:11:18.81\00:11:20.54 were given a game of Tetris to play, 00:11:20.54\00:11:22.41 within the first few hours of the trauma, 00:11:22.41\00:11:24.88 it greatly reduced the potential for PTSD, 00:11:24.88\00:11:28.58 even if all they did was play the game for 20 minutes. 00:11:28.58\00:11:32.12 A psychology professor by the name of Emily Holmes 00:11:32.12\00:11:34.92 found these studies promising. 00:11:34.92\00:11:36.49 As reported in this online article 00:11:36.49\00:11:38.26 published by CPR News, which said, 00:11:38.26\00:11:40.96 "Holmes feels that playing Tetris shortly after an accident 00:11:40.96\00:11:44.27 "can interfere with memory consolidation, 00:11:44.27\00:11:46.94 "or the gradual conversion 00:11:46.94\00:11:48.47 "of short-term memories into more permanent ones. 00:11:48.47\00:11:51.57 "Evidence suggests that there 00:11:51.57\00:11:53.01 "is a window following a trauma, 00:11:53.01\00:11:54.91 "in which a bad memory can be disrupted or avoided, 00:11:54.91\00:11:58.28 "and in which memories can be uncoupled 00:11:58.28\00:12:00.38 "from the brain's emotional centers." 00:12:00.38\00:12:03.22 Now, I'm certainly not a qualified psychologist 00:12:03.22\00:12:06.92 by any stretch of the imagination, 00:12:06.92\00:12:09.22 and as an amateur I know just enough 00:12:09.22\00:12:11.93 to be a little dangerous. 00:12:11.93\00:12:13.56 But, honestly, 00:12:13.56\00:12:14.83 this research does make sense to me. 00:12:14.83\00:12:17.47 Quite apart from the fact that I could hear 00:12:17.47\00:12:19.13 the Tetris music playing in my head 00:12:19.13\00:12:20.97 when I read that story, 00:12:20.97\00:12:22.50 and you're welcome because you can probably hear it now too, 00:12:22.50\00:12:25.24 apart from that, this research struck a chord with me. 00:12:25.24\00:12:28.98 It makes a lot of sense. 00:12:28.98\00:12:31.01 [light dramatic music] 00:12:31.01\00:12:32.25 In fact, I've been in a few car wrecks, 00:12:32.25\00:12:34.62 including a bad one that I caused 00:12:34.62\00:12:36.25 when I was just a few days shy of my 17th birthday. 00:12:36.25\00:12:39.69 For the next few weeks, 00:12:39.69\00:12:40.76 every time I closed my eyes, 00:12:40.76\00:12:42.66 I saw nothing but car accident. 00:12:42.66\00:12:45.03 I could see the moment the car became airborne, 00:12:45.03\00:12:47.73 I could hear the screams of my passengers 00:12:47.73\00:12:50.30 and hear the horrible sound of steel 00:12:50.30\00:12:52.40 grinding against steel. 00:12:52.40\00:12:54.34 And I could feel the impact when the car 00:12:54.34\00:12:56.54 was stopped by a tree at the bottom of a cliff. 00:12:56.54\00:13:00.08 And in the beginning, 00:13:00.08\00:13:00.94 it felt like that playback loop 00:13:00.94\00:13:03.11 was never ever going to stop. 00:13:03.11\00:13:06.11 It was an experience that was so unusual, 00:13:06.11\00:13:08.12 so out of step with my day-to-day life, 00:13:08.12\00:13:10.42 that my brain didn't know what to do with it. 00:13:10.42\00:13:13.29 I mean, if you ask a stunt man 00:13:13.29\00:13:14.69 if his dreams are haunted by his work, 00:13:14.69\00:13:16.49 the answer's probably no, 00:13:16.49\00:13:18.26 unless there was something particularly horrible 00:13:18.26\00:13:20.63 when somebody was hurt or killed. 00:13:20.63\00:13:22.96 But for the most part, 00:13:22.96\00:13:24.17 this is what these guys do every single day, 00:13:24.17\00:13:25.63 so they can sleep comfortably at night. 00:13:25.63\00:13:27.77 Their world makes perfect sense. 00:13:27.77\00:13:30.37 But crashing cars was not what I do on a daily basis, 00:13:30.37\00:13:33.91 and so the memory haunted me. 00:13:33.91\00:13:35.88 The scenes appeared on the stage 00:13:35.88\00:13:37.41 of my mind uncontrollably, 00:13:37.41\00:13:39.11 reemerging when I least expected it. 00:13:39.11\00:13:42.02 I had no way to make sense of them. 00:13:42.02\00:13:44.49 I mean, over time the problem went away, 00:13:44.49\00:13:47.16 but there are people whose trauma 00:13:47.16\00:13:48.82 continues to haunt them for many, many years. 00:13:48.82\00:13:51.86 And from where I sit, and remember I'm not an expert, 00:13:51.86\00:13:55.26 but from where I sit, it seems like part of the problem 00:13:55.26\00:13:58.63 is that we just don't know what to do with the information, 00:13:58.63\00:14:02.20 and that's where a game of Tetris really makes sense. 00:14:02.20\00:14:05.54 I mean, think about it. 00:14:05.54\00:14:07.01 A game like Tetris requires you to make order out of chaos. 00:14:07.01\00:14:10.81 Tetris is a game where geometric shapes 00:14:10.81\00:14:12.81 are falling out of the sky, 00:14:12.81\00:14:14.05 and you have to rotate and guide them, 00:14:14.05\00:14:15.88 so that they all fit together like puzzle pieces 00:14:15.88\00:14:18.62 at the bottom of the screen. 00:14:18.62\00:14:20.29 Again, it's order out of chaos. 00:14:20.29\00:14:22.72 [gentle music] 00:14:22.72\00:14:23.76 And while the chaos you faced 00:14:23.76\00:14:25.13 in real life isn't quite like that, 00:14:25.13\00:14:27.66 your brain can still sense that you're working on it. 00:14:27.66\00:14:30.13 That you're restoring order, 00:14:30.13\00:14:31.90 and maybe, just maybe, the act of organizing random blocks 00:14:31.90\00:14:36.00 puts your random thoughts into some kind of order as well, 00:14:36.00\00:14:38.77 because your brain thinks it's finally dealing with it. 00:14:38.77\00:14:42.68 It's not, unlike the notepad, I keep close to my bed. 00:14:42.68\00:14:46.08 I've been a horrible sleeper my whole life, 00:14:46.08\00:14:48.28 and one of the things that disrupts my sleep 00:14:48.28\00:14:50.09 on a regular basis is unfinished business. 00:14:50.09\00:14:53.92 A random thought will pop into my head 00:14:53.92\00:14:56.06 in the middle of the night reminding me 00:14:56.06\00:14:57.96 of an unfinished task. 00:14:57.96\00:14:59.73 And, of course, at two o'clock in the morning, 00:14:59.73\00:15:01.63 there's not much I can do about it. 00:15:01.63\00:15:03.50 I can't make a phone call and ask someone to help me. 00:15:03.50\00:15:06.27 I can't call a meeting to discuss the problem with staff, 00:15:06.27\00:15:09.70 and so it haunts me like a broken tooth 00:15:09.70\00:15:11.91 at the back of my mouth that my tongue 00:15:11.91\00:15:13.64 just can't stop playing with. 00:15:13.64\00:15:16.41 So what do I do? 00:15:16.41\00:15:17.88 I write it down. 00:15:17.88\00:15:19.15 It might be as simple as writing, 00:15:19.15\00:15:20.78 "Ask Ruben about our production schedule," 00:15:20.78\00:15:22.92 or, "Ask Kyle when he needs the details 00:15:22.92\00:15:24.99 "for the brochure we're going to produce." 00:15:24.99\00:15:27.26 Then the minute I write it down, 00:15:27.26\00:15:28.52 my brain marks it as handled, 00:15:28.52\00:15:30.89 and let's go of it. 00:15:30.89\00:15:32.39 So maybe doing something like 00:15:32.39\00:15:33.96 Tetris convinces your brain 00:15:33.96\00:15:35.33 that you've handled the issue, 00:15:35.33\00:15:36.43 and it can begin to relax. 00:15:36.43\00:15:38.80 You might not be able to walk away from the problem, 00:15:38.80\00:15:41.17 but at least now you've done something, 00:15:41.17\00:15:43.74 and your mind begins to perceive 00:15:43.74\00:15:45.91 a little more order. 00:15:45.91\00:15:47.68 Now, of course I really have no idea why Mr. Mole Man 00:15:49.01\00:15:51.18 is actually under the ground digging, 00:15:51.18\00:15:52.68 but I can tell you that it appeals to me simply because 00:15:52.68\00:15:56.15 that looks like my kind of therapy, 00:15:56.15\00:15:58.79 which brings me to the Bible, 00:15:58.79\00:16:00.69 because it has a lot to say about the subject of worry. 00:16:00.69\00:16:04.13 There's a well-loved expression 00:16:04.13\00:16:05.63 in one of Peter's letters, and it reads like this. 00:16:05.63\00:16:09.06 "Therefore, humble yourselves 00:16:09.06\00:16:10.67 "under the mighty hand of God, 00:16:10.67\00:16:12.47 "that he may exalt you in due time. 00:16:12.47\00:16:14.67 "Casting all your care upon him, 00:16:14.67\00:16:17.41 "for he caress for you." 00:16:17.41\00:16:18.77 The Greek word for care is "merimna", 00:16:19.91\00:16:22.81 and it literally means anxiety. 00:16:22.81\00:16:25.88 This was written at a time when the Roman Empire 00:16:25.88\00:16:28.22 was just becoming aware of the existence of Christians, 00:16:28.22\00:16:30.65 and the emperor didn't like them. 00:16:30.65\00:16:33.02 Peter died in fact, under the reign of Nero, 00:16:33.02\00:16:35.29 who took special delight in killing Christians 00:16:35.29\00:16:38.16 in very inventive and diabolical ways. 00:16:38.16\00:16:41.16 He had some of them sewn into animal skins 00:16:41.16\00:16:43.23 and dropped in front of a hungry pack of dogs. 00:16:43.23\00:16:46.10 There were others that he dipped in tar 00:16:46.10\00:16:47.87 and hung from crosses, 00:16:47.87\00:16:49.10 so that he could light them on fire 00:16:49.10\00:16:50.91 and use them as nightlights in the arena. 00:16:50.91\00:16:53.51 It was a very stressful time to be a Christian, 00:16:53.51\00:16:56.78 and you can be sure there was no shortage of trauma 00:16:56.78\00:16:59.78 that believers suffered. 00:16:59.78\00:17:01.95 And how does Peter suggest they handle it? 00:17:01.95\00:17:04.55 By releasing their cares to God, 00:17:04.55\00:17:06.82 and I'll be right back after this break 00:17:06.82\00:17:09.19 to talk about that. 00:17:09.19\00:17:10.29 [gentle music] 00:17:10.29\00:17:12.63 - [Announcer] Here at the "Voice of Prophecy", 00:17:12.63\00:17:14.10 we're committed to creating top-quality programming 00:17:14.10\00:17:16.56 for the whole family. 00:17:16.56\00:17:18.03 Like our audio adventure series "Discovery Mountain". 00:17:18.03\00:17:21.10 "Discovery Mountain" is a Bible-based program 00:17:21.10\00:17:23.67 for kids of all ages and backgrounds. 00:17:23.67\00:17:26.01 Your family will enjoy the faith-building stories 00:17:26.01\00:17:28.78 from this small mountain summer camp and town. 00:17:28.78\00:17:31.65 With 24 seasonal episodes every year 00:17:31.65\00:17:34.12 and fresh content every week, 00:17:34.12\00:17:36.28 there's always a new adventure 00:17:36.28\00:17:37.99 just on the horizon. 00:17:37.99\00:17:39.55 - Sometimes the advice 00:17:42.09\00:17:43.36 that Christians like to give each other 00:17:43.36\00:17:44.93 during really trying times isn't really very helpful. 00:17:44.93\00:17:49.56 It's a little like Job's friends, 00:17:49.56\00:17:51.30 who came to help him grieve his incredible loss. 00:17:51.30\00:17:54.57 These guys really meant well, 00:17:54.57\00:17:56.64 but what they were doing with the things they said 00:17:56.64\00:17:59.14 was kind of heaping salt into his wounds. 00:17:59.14\00:18:02.21 I mean, statements like, 00:18:02.21\00:18:03.61 "Job, have you considered 00:18:03.61\00:18:04.75 "that this is probably your fault?" 00:18:04.75\00:18:06.95 That's not particularly helpful when somebody's hurting, 00:18:06.95\00:18:09.42 because trust me hurting people 00:18:09.42\00:18:11.89 have already considered that. 00:18:11.89\00:18:14.39 I've discovered over the years that people 00:18:14.39\00:18:16.09 are usually afraid to go and visit somebody 00:18:16.09\00:18:18.49 who has suffered incredible loss, 00:18:18.49\00:18:20.13 because, well, they don't know what to say. 00:18:20.13\00:18:24.03 So let me put your mind at ease. 00:18:24.03\00:18:25.33 I can tell you after decades 00:18:25.33\00:18:26.87 of sitting with grieving families, 00:18:26.87\00:18:29.34 it's not what you say that matters 00:18:29.34\00:18:31.61 nearly as much as the fact that you showed up. 00:18:31.61\00:18:34.88 Unless, of course, you say something really hurtful, 00:18:34.88\00:18:37.91 which I promise you they will remember. 00:18:37.91\00:18:40.95 And often when the wound is fresh, 00:18:40.95\00:18:42.52 saying less actually proves to be more. 00:18:42.52\00:18:46.15 I mean, that's exactly what Seneca wrote to his mother. 00:18:46.15\00:18:48.52 "I would've written sooner, 00:18:48.52\00:18:50.23 "but I didn't want to make things worse." 00:18:50.23\00:18:53.63 So sometimes, as my wife can tell you, 00:18:53.63\00:18:56.53 I really don't want to talk about things 00:18:56.53\00:18:58.57 when I'm troubled by them, 00:18:58.57\00:19:00.47 but I will talk to God, 00:19:00.47\00:19:02.27 and I don't always have the words 00:19:02.27\00:19:03.51 to express what I'm feeling. 00:19:03.51\00:19:05.57 And in that case, I fall back on something 00:19:05.57\00:19:07.71 I found in Romans chapter eight where Paul says this. 00:19:07.71\00:19:11.31 Listen, "Likewise, the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. 00:19:11.31\00:19:16.38 "For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, 00:19:17.79\00:19:19.92 "but the Spirit himself makes intercession for us 00:19:19.92\00:19:23.43 "with groanings which cannot be uttered." 00:19:23.43\00:19:26.76 So, in other words, 00:19:26.76\00:19:28.43 it doesn't matter if I don't have the vocabulary 00:19:28.43\00:19:31.50 to express what I'm feeling, because God does. 00:19:31.50\00:19:35.74 He knows full well what it's like to live 00:19:35.74\00:19:37.87 here on this planet, because he's been here, 00:19:37.87\00:19:40.44 and he struggled to the point of actually 00:19:40.44\00:19:42.44 sweating blood in the garden of Gethsemane. 00:19:42.44\00:19:46.18 Listen to what the author 00:19:46.18\00:19:47.45 of the book of Hebrews tells us about Jesus. 00:19:47.45\00:19:50.25 "For we do not have a High Priest 00:19:50.25\00:19:52.22 "who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, 00:19:52.22\00:19:55.22 "but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. 00:19:55.22\00:19:59.86 "Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace 00:19:59.86\00:20:02.36 "that we may obtain mercy 00:20:02.36\00:20:04.33 "and find grace to help in time of need." 00:20:04.33\00:20:07.67 The Bible reveals a personal God who gets us 00:20:08.74\00:20:12.77 because he's not a stranger to suffering. 00:20:12.77\00:20:15.44 He entered this chaotic world of ours, 00:20:15.44\00:20:18.15 a world that made no sense, 00:20:18.15\00:20:20.18 a world that was ripped apart by trauma, 00:20:20.18\00:20:23.65 [light instrumental music] and he made sense out of it. 00:20:23.65\00:20:25.59 And then he invites you 00:20:25.59\00:20:26.76 to share what's killing you, 00:20:26.76\00:20:29.16 to bring those haunting thoughts 00:20:29.16\00:20:30.66 that refuse to stop torturing you 00:20:30.66\00:20:32.73 and share them with him. 00:20:32.73\00:20:34.76 "Cast your cares upon him," Peter writes, 00:20:34.76\00:20:37.53 "because he cares for you." 00:20:37.53\00:20:39.57 And sometimes when the pain is too deep for words, 00:20:39.57\00:20:43.47 when my voice begins to falter 00:20:43.47\00:20:45.34 because I don't know how to handle what I'm talking about, 00:20:45.34\00:20:49.51 I actually take out my laptop and I begin to write. 00:20:49.51\00:20:52.78 And I address it to God as if it was an email 00:20:52.78\00:20:55.52 that he was going to receive in a matter of seconds. 00:20:55.52\00:20:58.05 [gentle instrumental music] 00:20:58.05\00:20:59.02 And wouldn't you know it? 00:20:59.02\00:21:00.59 There's just something about 00:21:00.59\00:21:02.06 the very act of organizing my thoughts 00:21:02.06\00:21:04.13 and presenting them to somebody bigger than myself 00:21:04.13\00:21:07.50 that begins to melt my anxiety. 00:21:07.50\00:21:10.20 My brain actually begins to let go of it, 00:21:10.20\00:21:12.23 because it senses that I'm dealing with it. 00:21:12.23\00:21:15.67 I take those thoughts and I put them somewhere 00:21:15.67\00:21:18.21 by the act of placing them in God's hands. 00:21:18.21\00:21:21.88 You know, I'm suddenly reminded of something 00:21:21.88\00:21:23.75 that you find over in the book of Isaiah 00:21:23.75\00:21:26.01 in chapter 43 where God says, 00:21:26.01\00:21:28.92 "Fear not, for I have redeemed you. 00:21:28.92\00:21:31.62 "I have called you by your name. 00:21:31.62\00:21:33.39 "You are mine. 00:21:33.39\00:21:34.69 "When you pass through the waters, 00:21:34.69\00:21:36.26 "I will be with you, 00:21:36.26\00:21:37.59 "and through the rivers, 00:21:37.59\00:21:38.53 "they shall not overflow you. 00:21:38.53\00:21:40.23 "When you walk through fire, 00:21:40.23\00:21:41.60 "you shall not be burned, 00:21:41.60\00:21:43.20 "nor shall the flame scorch you. 00:21:43.20\00:21:45.00 "For I am the Lord your God, 00:21:45.00\00:21:47.64 "the Holy One of Israel." 00:21:47.64\00:21:50.04 "Lord, how in the world am I going to handle this?" 00:21:50.04\00:21:53.71 God answers, "You can't handle it, so let go of it. 00:21:53.71\00:21:57.25 "I know your brain needs a place to put this anxiety, 00:21:57.25\00:22:00.28 "so why don't you leave it with me?" 00:22:00.28\00:22:03.12 Now, of course, that's easier said than done, 00:22:03.12\00:22:05.25 and I suppose that's one of the reasons 00:22:05.25\00:22:07.42 that I tend to write things down 00:22:07.42\00:22:09.16 because I can always go back 00:22:09.16\00:22:11.53 and remind myself that the problem isn't mine anymore. 00:22:11.53\00:22:14.60 I gave it away to somebody else, 00:22:14.60\00:22:16.90 and now it's stored in the best place possible. 00:22:16.90\00:22:20.17 In the 23rd Psalm, 00:22:21.17\00:22:22.64 easily the best known and most loved of all the Psalms, 00:22:22.64\00:22:25.74 David says this, 00:22:25.74\00:22:27.58 "Yea, though I walk through 00:22:27.58\00:22:29.48 "the valley of the shadow of death, 00:22:29.48\00:22:31.05 "I will fear no evil. 00:22:31.05\00:22:32.75 "For you are with me. 00:22:32.75\00:22:33.95 "You're rod and your staff they comfort me." 00:22:33.95\00:22:36.95 Take a careful look at what that says. 00:22:38.05\00:22:40.29 As you likely know, 00:22:40.29\00:22:41.82 because it's been read on a thousand special occasions, 00:22:41.82\00:22:44.66 the poem begins with the words, 00:22:44.66\00:22:45.99 "The Lord is my shepherd. 00:22:45.99\00:22:47.76 "I shall not want." 00:22:47.76\00:22:49.90 So when it mentions a rod and a staff, 00:22:49.90\00:22:52.37 it's actually using pastoral language. 00:22:52.37\00:22:54.44 It's a picture of a shepherd guiding his sheep, 00:22:54.44\00:22:56.60 bringing order out of chaos. 00:22:56.60\00:22:59.31 Left to themselves, sheep will scatter. 00:22:59.31\00:23:01.38 They'll go off in a dozen different directions. 00:23:01.38\00:23:03.88 That's why sheepdogs are so valuable. 00:23:03.88\00:23:06.21 They know how to corral the sheep 00:23:06.21\00:23:08.02 and keep them going in the right direction. 00:23:08.02\00:23:10.72 This psalm uses the language of order, 00:23:10.72\00:23:13.92 and it's better than a sheepdog. 00:23:13.92\00:23:15.62 This is God moving the random blocks of your life 00:23:15.62\00:23:18.23 into something that will make a lot more sense. 00:23:18.23\00:23:21.46 All right, it's time for one last break, 00:23:21.46\00:23:23.93 and then I'll come back and wrap things up. 00:23:23.93\00:23:26.50 [gentle music] 00:23:26.50\00:23:29.30 - [Announcer] Life can throw a lot at us. 00:23:29.30\00:23:31.71 Sometimes we don't have all the answers, 00:23:31.71\00:23:35.04 but that's where the Bible comes in. 00:23:35.04\00:23:37.48 It's our guide to a more fulfilling life. 00:23:37.48\00:23:40.58 Here at the "Voice of Prophecy", 00:23:40.58\00:23:42.15 we've created the Discover Bible Guides 00:23:42.15\00:23:44.32 to be your guide to the Bible. 00:23:44.32\00:23:45.89 They're designed to be simple, easy to use, 00:23:45.89\00:23:48.39 and provide answers to many of life's toughest questions, 00:23:48.39\00:23:51.43 and they're absolutely free. 00:23:51.43\00:23:53.43 So jump online now, or give us a call, 00:23:53.43\00:23:55.83 and start your journey of discovery. 00:23:55.83\00:23:58.03 - Well, there you go. 00:23:59.33\00:24:00.14 I've done it again. 00:24:00.14\00:24:01.10 I've blathered on and on and on 00:24:01.10\00:24:02.60 until I've just about run out of time. 00:24:02.60\00:24:05.71 But maybe before we're finished, 00:24:05.71\00:24:07.34 let me go back to the tunneling boyfriend 00:24:07.34\00:24:09.31 one last time. 00:24:09.31\00:24:11.01 I really don't know what it is about that tunnel that 00:24:11.01\00:24:13.78 that guy loves, because we've never met, 00:24:13.78\00:24:16.45 but I can guess. 00:24:16.45\00:24:18.35 I might be wrong, but I can guess. 00:24:18.35\00:24:20.86 There's nothing down there under the ground 00:24:20.86\00:24:22.92 except for hard work and his private thoughts. 00:24:22.92\00:24:26.59 He's down there bringing order out of chaos, 00:24:26.59\00:24:29.96 and that just happens to be one of the deepest needs 00:24:29.96\00:24:32.83 that you and I have. 00:24:32.83\00:24:34.80 And this is really one of the reasons 00:24:34.80\00:24:36.54 that I've learned to love reading the Bible. 00:24:36.54\00:24:40.14 This is a bluntly honest book, 00:24:40.14\00:24:43.45 and it reveals the human condition exactly the way it is. 00:24:43.45\00:24:47.12 It doesn't sugarcoat it. 00:24:47.12\00:24:49.48 You'll find all the same trauma 00:24:49.48\00:24:51.05 that you find in 21st century life. 00:24:51.05\00:24:53.02 This book talks about things like murder and betrayal, 00:24:53.02\00:24:57.09 and even rejection by family. 00:24:57.09\00:24:59.89 In fact, the gospel accounts show us that Jesus himself 00:24:59.89\00:25:03.67 went through all those things and more. 00:25:03.67\00:25:06.84 Far from being pie in the sky, 00:25:06.84\00:25:08.90 this book is an honest, 00:25:08.90\00:25:10.74 a real depiction of what human life is like, 00:25:10.74\00:25:14.38 but then it offers us some peace of mind, 00:25:15.48\00:25:17.65 a way to organize the trauma of this world 00:25:17.65\00:25:19.98 and begin to make sense out of it. 00:25:19.98\00:25:22.42 In Psalm 46, 00:25:22.42\00:25:24.25 the psalmist writes these words, 00:25:24.25\00:25:27.49 "God is our refuge and strength, 00:25:27.49\00:25:29.96 "a very present help and trouble. 00:25:29.96\00:25:32.26 "Therefore, we will not fear, 00:25:32.26\00:25:34.50 "even though the earth be removed, 00:25:34.50\00:25:36.43 "and though the mountains be carried 00:25:36.43\00:25:37.83 "into the midst of the sea, 00:25:37.83\00:25:39.50 "though its waters roar and be troubled, 00:25:39.50\00:25:41.97 "though the mountains shake with its swelling." 00:25:41.97\00:25:44.91 Look, I'd love to sit here today 00:25:45.81\00:25:47.08 and tell you that I've mastered all of this, 00:25:47.08\00:25:49.01 but that wouldn't be true. 00:25:49.01\00:25:51.11 I'm still learning how to control anxiety, 00:25:51.11\00:25:54.05 but I can tell you this. 00:25:54.05\00:25:55.88 Knowing that somebody out there 00:25:55.88\00:25:57.65 can still see the sense of my life 00:25:57.65\00:25:59.89 [light instrumental music] on the days that I can't, 00:25:59.89\00:26:01.99 that makes all the difference in the world, 00:26:01.99\00:26:03.93 because now I've got somewhere 00:26:03.93\00:26:05.69 to take my chaotic thoughts and file them. 00:26:05.69\00:26:08.03 They're somewhere to put them. 00:26:08.03\00:26:10.20 I have full permission to lean 00:26:10.20\00:26:12.33 into the pain of this life and confront it, 00:26:12.33\00:26:15.74 which many people will tell you is one of the fastest ways 00:26:15.74\00:26:19.01 to begin the healing process. 00:26:19.01\00:26:20.94 Some people look for distractions 00:26:21.91\00:26:24.11 in an effort to cheat their grief and anxiety, 00:26:24.11\00:26:27.62 but as a good friend of mine pointed out 00:26:27.62\00:26:29.52 after tragically losing his wife, 00:26:29.52\00:26:32.02 it is almost always better to face your grief head on. 00:26:32.02\00:26:36.73 Take it, place it under the heading "God's Problem", 00:26:36.73\00:26:41.06 and leave it with him. 00:26:41.06\00:26:42.80 Now, it's organized. 00:26:42.80\00:26:44.00 It's categorized, [light hopeful music] 00:26:44.00\00:26:45.33 and at least partially dealt with. 00:26:45.33\00:26:48.20 "Be anxious for nothing," Paul once wrote, 00:26:48.20\00:26:50.94 "but in everything by prayer and supplication, 00:26:50.94\00:26:53.24 "with thanksgiving, let your request be made known to God, 00:26:53.24\00:26:57.08 "and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding 00:26:57.08\00:27:01.48 "will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." 00:27:01.48\00:27:05.52 You know, in the opening chapter of the book of Ezekiel, 00:27:05.52\00:27:08.09 the prophet saw this whirlwind. 00:27:08.09\00:27:09.86 I mean, the very definition of chaos, 00:27:09.86\00:27:12.66 and it was a prophetic representation 00:27:12.66\00:27:14.83 of the world he found himself living in. 00:27:14.83\00:27:16.50 He was in Babylonian exile, 00:27:16.50\00:27:19.03 but then he looked up above the storm, 00:27:19.03\00:27:21.27 and he saw the throne of God up there, 00:27:21.27\00:27:23.74 and realized there is someone out there 00:27:23.74\00:27:26.24 who can handle it. 00:27:26.24\00:27:28.08 You know, some people go and dig tunnels. 00:27:28.08\00:27:32.05 Other people like me go and shovel heavy wet snow 00:27:32.05\00:27:36.05 or do something physical to help organize their thoughts. 00:27:36.05\00:27:39.62 Other people learn the ancient art of prayer, 00:27:39.62\00:27:42.99 and as they learn to pray, 00:27:42.99\00:27:44.43 they discover something remarkable. 00:27:44.43\00:27:46.83 You can take all the chaos of this world, 00:27:46.83\00:27:49.03 the chaos, the pain, the anxiety of your life, 00:27:49.03\00:27:52.30 and hand it over to somebody who's got it under control, 00:27:52.30\00:27:56.20 and at that moment you'll discover 00:27:56.20\00:27:58.37 you really can have peace of mind. 00:27:58.37\00:28:01.48 Thanks for joining me for today's episode of "Authentic". 00:28:01.48\00:28:04.55 We'll see you again next week. 00:28:04.55\00:28:06.65 [mellow instrumental music] 00:28:06.65\00:28:10.39