A good father
takes time to play.
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He has strong integrity.
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He is someone that
is truly dedicated.
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He is not afraid
to show his love.
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He is a caring provider.
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And he is a kind
spiritual leader.
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These are just a few ways
to describe a father's heart.
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Hi. Welcome to A Father's Heart.
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I'm your host Xavier.
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And we're going to be discussing
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how to help your children
deal with racism, part two.
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And with me to
discuss this topic
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is my friends Denry and Paul.
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How are you, guys, today?
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Doing well. Praise God, man.
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You know, last time
we spoke about this,
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we went over a
lot of different areas
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on how to help our
children deal with,
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well, the elephant in the
room or as we joked about it,
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the pink elephant in the room,
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but the elephant
in the room is racism,
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racism in our
church, racism in the world.
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And today, we want to talk about
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how do we deal
with that, how do we...
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Basically, constructive
areas on helping our kids cope,
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and at the same time,
changing those around them.
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How do we deal with that?
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To be honest, we
don't deal with it.
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And I'm not saying
that in being indifferent,
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I'm saying that is human
nature cannot deal with racism.
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And I know that sounds
more theory and theology,
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but even in our practicality,
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where human nature
cannot deal racism.
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We have to allow Christ
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to really take
control of our lives
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in such a way that through Him,
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we have minister...
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Like for example,
you know, in Luke 3,
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Jesus actually brings it out.
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You know, when people say it...
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When I tell people,
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"You got to let
Christ deal with this."
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They say, "Oh,
are you just saying,
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you know, this in theology?"
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No.
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Look at how practical Christ was
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when He introduced
Himself in Luke 4 rather.
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He said, "The Spirit
of the Lord is upon Me
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to preach the
gospel to the poor."
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That's action "To
heal the brokenhearted,
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to proclaim
liberty to the captives,
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recover sight to the blind,
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to set liberty to
those who are oppressed."
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Okay?
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So His mission and His
duty was actions, was action,
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going in there healing the sick,
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taking care of the poor,
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even the woman at the well
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and others so breaking those
boundaries, those barriers.
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But rather, instead
of coming with the fist,
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you know, fight, fight, fight,
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you know, fight fire with fire.
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No, He said, you know what?
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"I'll be water." I'll be water.
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Okay? I'll be water.
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So I'm teaching my children
to be like Christ in this.
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You know, don't
focus so much energy
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on the negativity of the world.
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Jesus is going to come
before this thing ends, okay?
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Focus your attention on
doing good, exemplifying,
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let you be the last person
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they say, "Wow, that
person is a stereotype."
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No.
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Say, "Something's
different about this guy.
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I've insulted him,
but he compliments me."
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You know, you be different.
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And so that's why I
believe that that's how,
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if you want a
answer to your question,
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that's how we handle it
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by letting Christ
handle it through us.
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I've noticed a
significant change
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in the mindset of
our new generation,
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the millennials.
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Take for example Ancestry.com,
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something we didn't
have 20, 30 years ago,
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but they have a process
whereby they are helping people
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to trace their
background by DNA analysis.
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I'm just sitting here,
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I'm kind of curious
even just looking at us
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because Luke 15,
"Who is my neighbor?"
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I think is a concept that
we must embrace and amplify
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within our homes,
within our churches.
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The sense of
independence or isolation,
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that self
isolation in some cases,
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separatism that
many of us would embrace,
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and accidentally or
intentionally nurture
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to our children.
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We have to be very
careful about that.
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This picture of us against them,
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we are who we are,
they are who they are,
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etc, etc, etc.
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And start
looking at things again
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from a humanitarian perspective,
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from the
perspective of humanity.
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So I'm just curious
looking at each of us here,
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what exactly is your
mixture and your make up
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to your knowledge?
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Well, mine, I
know, doing research,
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my family was
half French and Italian
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and Spaniard on my mom's side.
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Then I have direct
descendants from Africa,
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not sure which country in Africa
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because the slaves,
their names were changed.
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Right.
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You know, first name
is the Christian name
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that the Spaniards gave to them
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and then the last name is
the slave owner's last name.
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So that much I know,
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but I know my dad's side is
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predominantly
African with Dutch mixed into
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and a little bit of
Spaniards simply because,
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unfortunately, I am a result
of my ancestors being raped.
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So there is, by
no will of my own,
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Spaniard in the
bloodline as well.
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So what is that
you just referenced?
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Six? Five or six?
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Yeah, about five...
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Actually about six. Okay.
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And that's just the preliminary.
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And yourself? I can
only go back about five.
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You black, dude. You black.
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Yeah, I'm black but my
great greats had Jewish.
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Jewish? Yeah, Ethiopian.
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Oh.
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And my great,
great, grandma on the side.
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On my dad's side,
Maroon Indians, Blacks,
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and there's another one,
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there's some
European in there someplace
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but I'm not sure exactly.
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But... Whoa.
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Yeah, I'm a melting pot. Yeah.
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And for me,
people meet me and...
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All mixed up.
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I'm South American by
birth, from Ghana, African,
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East Indian grandmother,
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grandfather that was native mix,
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Taino Arawak mixed,
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and a great grandfather
that was Chinese mixed.
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So I have East Indian,
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African, Chinese, native.
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You know, what
I'm painting here is
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we are all in essence humanity,
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you know, and this is a start...
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It is a good starting
point or teaching point
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that I share with my child.
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Now we have to be careful
as we establish that truth,
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that reality to
talk also about identity.
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So who you are in identity
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is quite different
from who you are racially.
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So, we three here, even
though we are different shades,
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we share a common identity.
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Yes. And it's okay to be...
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It's okay to have an identities,
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you know, sometimes,
you come into the church
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and we can be so stringent
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and resistant of cultures.
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We feel that
culture and identity,
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in some sense, is a bad thing.
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It's okay.
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It's okay for
someone to be proud of
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their Italian heritage,
or their African heritage,
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or their Puerto Rican heritage,
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or their
African-American heritage
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'cause that's something
different that I learned
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in assimilating to the
culture here in that in America,
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you could be a
multiplicity of shades
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but we identify in one
struggle as African-Americans,
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that's all right.
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So I think, in essence,
it's important for us to know,
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for us to teach our
children, "Who is my neighbor?"
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Yes.
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And your
neighbor, living within you,
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is a diversity of
people backgrounds,
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but also to recognize the person
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that is not "supposedly" in
you, racially or ethnically,
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that person is
your neighbor also,
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and you need to
especially demonstrate
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care, love, and benevolence
towards those individuals
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whether they be from the
hills of Georgia, or Russia,
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or wherever that may be.
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And I think, too, it's
important to show our kids
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to be empathetic
with their neighbors.
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I have somebody
that I had a discussion
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with African-American,
and I say African-American
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because the
person, they said it to me,
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"You know, you're Caribbean.
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You're able to find out
where your ancestors came from,
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but as an African-American,
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I can't because I don't know
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other than they came
on a ship unwillingly.
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I have no way to trace them."
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You know, one...
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Well, I may not
agree or disagree
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with that
statement, the fact was that
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that person was hurting,
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you know, hurting
because I was able to find my,
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you know, those ancestors,
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but they are unable to
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or they felt
they were unable to.
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And I always try to teach
my daughters that even though
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people are going to
say what they want to say,
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listen to the hurt...
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Listen to the pain because
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even though they might
be angry or sound angry,
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beyond that, there's a hurt
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that you might be
able to help out with.
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And I've seen that a
lie, I've seen racism,
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at least in my viewpoint,
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has become more of a fear factor
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where people are afraid
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rather than
ignorant so to speak.
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They're just afraid,
they're afraid of being...
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Of many different
things, and that's something
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that I always try to
instill in my girls that
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a lot of this racism
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and a lot of anger
stems from fear, from fear.
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And our job, as
they say, the minorities,
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is to educate
those that are fearful,
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and show that not
only are we bleed like you
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and have the same
vital organs as you,
00:10:27.76\00:10:31.09
but our mentality
is different than you.
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Let's come together,
let us reason together,
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if they're willing obviously.
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In my studies and it's
been revealed to me that,
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and I'm not going to
call any specific race,
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but any
superiority, whatever the color,
00:10:47.11\00:10:51.78
superiority is actually
00:10:51.81\00:10:54.75
insecurity or inferiority.
00:10:54.78\00:10:59.49
If I'm supposed to
be superior, right?
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Then why is my objection,
00:11:01.86\00:11:04.09
my mission in life
to push you guys down?
00:11:04.13\00:11:08.06
If I'm superior,
then I'm okay by myself.
00:11:08.10\00:11:10.47
Look at God.
00:11:10.50\00:11:11.83
God is superior to us
and rather than being like,
00:11:11.87\00:11:15.54
you know, this demigod
who's crushing around people,
00:11:15.57\00:11:18.37
God is the what?
00:11:18.41\00:11:19.74
He's so superior
that He brings us up.
00:11:19.77\00:11:23.68
Revelation say, we're going
to sit on thrones with Him.
00:11:23.71\00:11:26.48
Amen. Come on.
00:11:26.51\00:11:28.75
All right?
00:11:28.78\00:11:30.12
And we saw it in
Eden, Adam and Eve there
00:11:30.15\00:11:32.19
and here they had
dominion whatever,
00:11:32.22\00:11:34.16
sin comes into the
world, divides us, God said,
00:11:34.19\00:11:36.42
"Look. I want My
people together."
00:11:36.46\00:11:37.79
One of the beautiful
things about Revelation 21,
00:11:37.83\00:11:40.23
one of my favorite passages,
00:11:40.26\00:11:42.10
it says, "I saw a
new heaven and new earth,
00:11:42.13\00:11:44.27
and there was no more sea."
00:11:44.30\00:11:47.94
And for me personally,
00:11:47.97\00:11:49.30
I interpret that as
there's no more division
00:11:49.34\00:11:52.57
because there's
no more Puerto Rico,
00:11:52.61\00:11:54.41
as much as I love Jamaica,
there's no more Jamaica,
00:11:54.44\00:11:57.35
there's no more
England, there's no more Africa,
00:11:57.38\00:11:59.45
there's no more separation,
00:11:59.48\00:12:02.55
and we find every
excuse to separate ourselves.
00:12:02.58\00:12:07.39
So going back to our children,
00:12:07.42\00:12:09.89
teach them every
excuse to mesh, to merge.
00:12:09.92\00:12:15.13
Okay? Amen.
00:12:15.16\00:12:16.50
So I can have...
00:12:16.53\00:12:17.87
I can be, and this
word has been so polluted,
00:12:17.90\00:12:20.64
I can be proud of my race,
00:12:20.67\00:12:22.70
of my identity
as you said better,
00:12:22.74\00:12:24.67
I think that's what it is,
being part of your identity,
00:12:24.71\00:12:27.78
but I can be proud
00:12:27.81\00:12:29.31
and still not
degrade somebody else's.
00:12:29.34\00:12:32.25
Exactly.
00:12:32.28\00:12:33.62
So when people say superiority,
00:12:33.65\00:12:36.69
they're really
saying inferiority.
00:12:36.72\00:12:38.99
I mean, I'm so
shallow about my race
00:12:39.02\00:12:43.09
that I have to try
to annihilate yours
00:12:43.12\00:12:45.29
so my race can survive.
00:12:45.33\00:12:46.73
Mercy.
00:12:46.76\00:12:48.56
Profound.
00:12:48.60\00:12:49.93
And it's
interesting you mention that
00:12:49.96\00:12:51.30
because, you know, we...
00:12:51.33\00:12:54.60
A lot of times,
we get asked by...
00:12:54.64\00:12:56.37
You know, Jesus was asked
00:12:56.40\00:12:57.74
by which authority do
you speak all these things,
00:12:57.77\00:13:01.01
and He said, "Well,
00:13:01.04\00:13:02.38
the authority is
given to Me by the Father."
00:13:02.41\00:13:04.51
You know, and a lot of times
we, people don't see us in our,
00:13:04.55\00:13:09.28
you know, nice
get up, so to speak.
00:13:09.32\00:13:11.39
And a lot of times,
I tell them, you know.
00:13:11.42\00:13:12.75
"Hey, I am a police chaplain,
00:13:12.79\00:13:15.29
I've been doing it
for over five years.
00:13:15.32\00:13:17.63
I've been doing
it for a long time.
00:13:17.66\00:13:19.09
I was a police officer."
00:13:19.13\00:13:21.06
I've seen racism
00:13:21.10\00:13:23.40
within the own
department I worked in
00:13:23.43\00:13:26.07
and I've seen that, you know,
the people that were racist,
00:13:26.10\00:13:29.40
they felt inferior to me
00:13:29.44\00:13:30.77
because I was the
one getting the overtime,
00:13:30.81\00:13:32.84
I was the one getting
called by the Federal Taskforce
00:13:32.87\00:13:35.04
to come and translate,
you know, I was the one
00:13:35.08\00:13:37.41
that was rising up
the ranks very quickly,
00:13:37.45\00:13:40.72
not because of my race
but because I put in to work.
00:13:40.75\00:13:44.55
Yes.
00:13:44.59\00:13:45.92
You know, and that's one
thing that I always tell people,
00:13:45.95\00:13:48.52
show them, you know,
what your background is,
00:13:48.56\00:13:50.63
where you come from,
that you didn't get there
00:13:50.66\00:13:52.83
because
somebody handed it to you
00:13:52.86\00:13:54.20
but you worked for it.
00:13:54.23\00:13:55.56
And I don't know, I
mean, what is your background,
00:13:55.60\00:13:58.53
you know, what do you guys do
00:13:58.57\00:13:59.90
that gives you this authority
to speak in such a way.
00:13:59.93\00:14:02.17
And one of the beautiful things,
00:14:02.20\00:14:05.54
God has just
change in my heart, right?
00:14:05.57\00:14:08.11
'Cause when I
was younger, I was...
00:14:08.14\00:14:09.51
I mean, you insult me,
I'm coming back at you,
00:14:09.54\00:14:12.58
but God put it in my
heart, you know, we have to...
00:14:12.61\00:14:15.68
You said something about
understand each other's hurt.
00:14:15.72\00:14:18.89
And one thing I've
learned in Genesis 3,
00:14:18.92\00:14:22.06
God didn't approach
00:14:22.09\00:14:23.43
when Adam and Eve
sinned or assumption.
00:14:23.46\00:14:26.63
You ever noticed that?
00:14:26.66\00:14:28.00
He asks the
question, "Where are you?
00:14:28.03\00:14:30.37
Who told you?"
00:14:30.40\00:14:31.93
You see what I'm saying?
00:14:31.97\00:14:33.90
In our humanity,
we always assume.
00:14:33.94\00:14:36.50
So here's a practical,
something that I did practical
00:14:36.54\00:14:39.31
and God used, God put
it in me and I used it.
00:14:39.34\00:14:41.91
When I went to
the seminary, right?
00:14:41.94\00:14:44.51
Or just the
school that I went to,
00:14:44.55\00:14:47.78
different departments,
different buildings,
00:14:47.82\00:14:49.52
I would go in there
and I'll see somebody
00:14:49.55\00:14:51.19
of a different
shade, or different race,
00:14:51.22\00:14:53.66
and they wouldn't
say good morning to me.
00:14:53.69\00:14:57.29
At first, it would hurt me,
I was like, "Am I not human?
00:14:57.33\00:15:01.00
I mean, am I some..."
00:15:01.03\00:15:02.36
My mother taught me,
00:15:02.40\00:15:03.73
if you walk into a
room and there's a pig,
00:15:03.77\00:15:05.10
you say, "Hello, pig."
00:15:05.13\00:15:06.47
You see a dog, "Hello, dog."
00:15:06.50\00:15:07.94
And so instead of
playing this game of
00:15:07.97\00:15:11.87
why didn't he say
hello, God taught me, you...
00:15:11.91\00:15:15.88
Matthew 5 is about you,
you're a Christian, you go.
00:15:15.91\00:15:19.41
So what I would do?
00:15:19.45\00:15:20.78
I would go in
there now and I say,
00:15:20.82\00:15:22.58
"Hey. Good morning.
How are you doing today?"
00:15:22.62\00:15:24.99
"I had a rough
day." So see right there?
00:15:25.02\00:15:29.12
I already
engaged in a relationship
00:15:29.16\00:15:31.59
and I'm polite, I'm polite.
00:15:31.63\00:15:34.36
So no matter how you come to me,
00:15:34.40\00:15:36.46
I'm going to be polite to you.
00:15:36.50\00:15:37.83
And do you know when I
left, these same individuals,
00:15:37.87\00:15:42.97
who at first,
were very cold to me
00:15:43.00\00:15:45.27
and I assumed they
were racist or whatever,
00:15:45.31\00:15:47.38
some of them were
crying because they said,
00:15:47.41\00:15:50.05
"Man, your manners,
00:15:50.08\00:15:51.65
you're so
respectful, you're so kind."
00:15:51.68\00:15:54.38
You know, I bought
some of the flowers,
00:15:54.42\00:15:55.78
I bought cards
and all these things,
00:15:55.82\00:15:57.35
these are practical things,
these are what change people,
00:15:57.39\00:16:00.62
these are the things.
00:16:00.66\00:16:02.19
Great point. Great point.
00:16:02.22\00:16:03.73
I heard your question.
00:16:03.76\00:16:05.43
So, well, let me ask, let
me bounce it back to Denry.
00:16:05.46\00:16:11.03
What qualifies you to speak
with authority on this matter
00:16:11.07\00:16:15.77
as far as your professional
background or your experience?
00:16:15.80\00:16:18.74
A professional
background? Or your experiences?
00:16:18.77\00:16:21.11
Oh, experience.
00:16:21.14\00:16:22.61
And my professional
background is I was a pastor.
00:16:22.64\00:16:25.28
Okay. But just
as a human being...
00:16:25.31\00:16:28.48
I feel as a human
being who's been hurt
00:16:28.52\00:16:31.52
and know what it
feels like to be hurt,
00:16:31.55\00:16:33.89
and when
somebody shows kindness,
00:16:33.92\00:16:35.99
that's why I feel like I
can speak on that authority.
00:16:36.02\00:16:37.96
Right, right.
00:16:37.99\00:16:39.33
Well for me as well,
00:16:39.36\00:16:40.83
it has a lot to do
with life experiences
00:16:40.86\00:16:43.10
but also some professional.
00:16:43.13\00:16:46.07
I have pastored
for over eight years
00:16:46.10\00:16:48.20
but I've also
been an administrator
00:16:48.24\00:16:50.44
in the area of social work,
00:16:50.47\00:16:52.34
family welfare
and child welfare,
00:16:52.37\00:16:54.78
and done a lot of counseling
education and workshops
00:16:54.81\00:17:00.68
dealing with
diffusing, conflict resolution,
00:17:00.72\00:17:05.42
building relationship,
and so on and so forth,
00:17:05.45\00:17:06.79
and I also serve
as an expert witness
00:17:06.82\00:17:08.76
within the courts for
matters of family reunification.
00:17:08.79\00:17:12.53
But I have a question for you
00:17:12.56\00:17:14.60
because a question
that I'm often asked is,
00:17:14.63\00:17:18.93
"What do I tell my
children, especially my sons,
00:17:18.97\00:17:23.20
as per how they can be
safe traversing society?"
00:17:23.24\00:17:29.14
You as someone that's a current
employee of law enforcement
00:17:29.18\00:17:33.88
and former
police officer and such,
00:17:33.92\00:17:36.38
what do we tell our children,
00:17:36.42\00:17:37.99
what do we tell
our church members
00:17:38.02\00:17:39.79
as per the practical of
how they can remain safe
00:17:39.82\00:17:44.23
in meandering
these pitfalls of racism?
00:17:44.26\00:17:47.66
Whether it be law enforcement
00:17:47.70\00:17:49.03
or whether it be some
resident of the civil community?
00:17:49.06\00:17:52.37
I think Denry touched on
it earlier a few minutes ago,
00:17:52.40\00:17:56.30
you know, where
he said his manners.
00:17:56.34\00:17:59.47
You know, even
though it might not keep you
00:17:59.51\00:18:03.24
from the ultimate fate
of that you might encounter
00:18:03.28\00:18:06.72
with some
individuals which is...
00:18:06.75\00:18:09.42
They're going to kill
you, the manners go a long way.
00:18:09.45\00:18:13.09
You know, you're not...
00:18:13.12\00:18:16.36
Working with police officers,
00:18:16.39\00:18:18.39
being trained as
a police officer,
00:18:18.43\00:18:21.83
your main goal is not out there
00:18:21.86\00:18:23.20
to kill somebody
or shoot somebody,
00:18:23.23\00:18:25.10
that's not your objective,
00:18:25.13\00:18:26.94
that you're there
to serve and protect.
00:18:26.97\00:18:29.77
Unfortunately, like
any other profession,
00:18:29.80\00:18:33.14
you have people that
fall through the cracks,
00:18:33.17\00:18:35.64
meaning that they come
in with the wrong mindset of
00:18:35.68\00:18:40.15
"Now I'm the authority."
00:18:40.18\00:18:41.52
You have pastors from the pulpit
00:18:41.55\00:18:43.18
abusing their power as pastors.
00:18:43.22\00:18:46.12
You're going to encounter it
00:18:46.15\00:18:47.49
in every
profession of authority.
00:18:47.52\00:18:49.79
And I always tell my
friends that are pastors,
00:18:49.82\00:18:52.06
there's not a
really big difference
00:18:52.09\00:18:53.60
between pastors and officers.
00:18:53.63\00:18:56.46
You both have the
authority to take life.
00:18:56.50\00:18:58.67
Mercy.
00:18:58.70\00:19:00.04
One is physical, one is eternal.
00:19:00.07\00:19:02.10
You both have the
authority to incarcerate people
00:19:02.14\00:19:05.74
whether it be
physical or spiritual.
00:19:05.77\00:19:08.94
You both have to
live by a weapon,
00:19:08.98\00:19:12.55
one is a physical gun,
00:19:12.58\00:19:14.78
the other one is the
Bible, the soul of the spirit.
00:19:14.82\00:19:18.55
You know, there is
not much difference.
00:19:18.59\00:19:20.06
And I always tell my kids,
00:19:20.09\00:19:22.46
be respectful,
just show respect,
00:19:22.49\00:19:25.53
"Yes, sir. No, sir.
Yes, ma'am. No, ma'am."
00:19:25.56\00:19:28.30
Will that save you? No.
00:19:28.33\00:19:31.03
But the likelihood of
escalating the situation
00:19:31.07\00:19:34.64
will be diminished
00:19:34.67\00:19:36.37
because now you
are being cooperative.
00:19:36.40\00:19:39.74
Everything is videoed
00:19:39.77\00:19:41.28
and you have plenty
of authority to video
00:19:41.31\00:19:44.51
depending on the state.
00:19:44.55\00:19:45.88
I always tell people Google
is a fountain of information.
00:19:45.91\00:19:49.22
You know, the irony behind
it is that as law enforcement,
00:19:49.25\00:19:52.09
you don't get
taught all the laws,
00:19:52.12\00:19:55.99
you're not a
lawyer, that's not your job.
00:19:56.02\00:19:57.63
Your job is to enforce the laws.
00:19:57.66\00:19:59.79
And I always
tell, you know, kids,
00:19:59.83\00:20:02.73
and I work with many youth,
you know, just be respectful.
00:20:02.76\00:20:05.70
They are
automatically going to assume.
00:20:05.73\00:20:08.10
Why?
00:20:08.14\00:20:09.47
Because you're taught
that everybody could kill you,
00:20:09.50\00:20:11.44
no matter what race.
00:20:11.47\00:20:12.81
That's right.
00:20:12.84\00:20:14.18
You're taught that anybody...
00:20:14.21\00:20:15.54
A little grandma can
kill you. That's right.
00:20:15.58\00:20:16.91
So compound
that with television,
00:20:16.95\00:20:19.11
which predominately
shows you one side of the coin
00:20:19.15\00:20:22.85
when it comes to black people.
00:20:22.88\00:20:24.75
You know,
Hollywood shows black people
00:20:24.79\00:20:27.12
are the drug
dealers, the criminals,
00:20:27.16\00:20:29.32
you know,
everything that is opposed to,
00:20:29.36\00:20:33.09
you know, being
lawful but lawless.
00:20:33.13\00:20:36.10
Music industry, same
thing, promotes lawlessness.
00:20:36.13\00:20:38.97
Mercy.
00:20:39.00\00:20:40.34
So you're
automatically preprogrammed
00:20:40.37\00:20:43.30
by your police academy,
00:20:43.34\00:20:45.01
throw in what
you're watching on TV,
00:20:45.04\00:20:46.74
Bible says, "By
beholding, you become" right?
00:20:46.78\00:20:49.04
So, you know, you have this idea
00:20:49.08\00:20:51.25
that
automatically, subconsciously,
00:20:51.28\00:20:54.55
you encounter a black person,
00:20:54.58\00:20:56.05
put your guard up,
they might have a gun.
00:20:56.08\00:20:58.42
You know, I was told jokingly,
00:20:58.45\00:20:59.79
"Oh, you're Hispanic.
You probably carry a knife."
00:20:59.82\00:21:02.26
I didn't find that funny.
00:21:02.29\00:21:04.16
But you know
what? That's reality.
00:21:04.19\00:21:06.26
And I always told kids,
00:21:06.29\00:21:07.76
you know, just be respectful,
00:21:07.80\00:21:09.26
be mindful of
how you address them,
00:21:09.30\00:21:11.43
be mindful of your hands,
00:21:11.47\00:21:14.44
you know, try to keep your hands
00:21:14.47\00:21:16.60
where they can see
them for their safety
00:21:16.64\00:21:19.34
because you're trained
that if you don't see the hands,
00:21:19.37\00:21:21.64
they might be
reaching for something.
00:21:21.68\00:21:24.38
And we see in events that, yeah,
00:21:24.41\00:21:27.02
it was through other thing,
00:21:27.05\00:21:28.38
the media is an
enemy of law enforcement,
00:21:28.42\00:21:30.35
not because they
might show the truth
00:21:30.39\00:21:32.45
but because a lot of times
00:21:32.49\00:21:34.82
you have half a clip
of what actually occurred,
00:21:34.86\00:21:37.89
of what lead to
that escalation of force.
00:21:37.93\00:21:41.30
And I always try to tell my kids
00:21:41.33\00:21:42.90
just, you know, keep
calm, know your rights,
00:21:42.93\00:21:46.80
which sounds ironic,
but do you have rights?
00:21:46.84\00:21:49.70
And if you feel
uncomfortable at any point,
00:21:49.74\00:21:52.64
in any and every department
even though every state,
00:21:52.67\00:21:55.94
every county is taught
differently unfortunately,
00:21:55.98\00:21:59.61
they're taught that, you
know, you have every right
00:21:59.65\00:22:01.75
to call a superior,
00:22:01.78\00:22:03.12
say "I want to speak to
your commanding officer."
00:22:03.15\00:22:06.25
And you are more
gonna wait there,
00:22:06.29\00:22:07.92
they have no way of
pushing you to do otherwise.
00:22:07.96\00:22:11.96
I always tell that if
you feel uncomfortable,
00:22:11.99\00:22:14.46
if you're at night, driving
00:22:14.50\00:22:16.06
and you get pulled
over somewhere that is dark,
00:22:16.10\00:22:19.43
you have every right to
drive to a well lit spot.
00:22:19.47\00:22:22.27
Just call, you know, 911
or dispatch or whomever, say.
00:22:22.30\00:22:24.84
"Hey I'm being
pulled over so and so.
00:22:24.87\00:22:27.28
Please let them know
that I'm not fleeing,
00:22:27.31\00:22:29.58
so don't speed off.
00:22:29.61\00:22:30.95
I'm not fleeing, I
just want to be at a spot"
00:22:30.98\00:22:33.62
or if you feel uncomfortable
00:22:33.65\00:22:34.98
because this might
be an unmarked vehicle.
00:22:35.02\00:22:37.35
You can call 911,
00:22:37.39\00:22:38.72
"Being pulled over by so and so.
00:22:38.75\00:22:40.79
You know, is
this a real officer?"
00:22:40.82\00:22:43.69
There's so many
things that can be prevented.
00:22:43.73\00:22:45.89
It starts, you
know... That's very important.
00:22:45.93\00:22:48.03
Especially through,
you have to keep calm,
00:22:48.06\00:22:51.03
you have to be
able to keep calm.
00:22:51.07\00:22:52.73
And while you're doing that,
00:22:52.77\00:22:54.10
that information
is being recorded
00:22:54.14\00:22:55.90
as evidence that you did.
00:22:55.94\00:22:57.27
Correct. That's very important.
00:22:57.31\00:22:58.64
Yeah, they have
mikes, everything.
00:22:58.67\00:23:00.04
What most people don't know is
00:23:00.08\00:23:01.41
once they flip
the light bar switch,
00:23:01.44\00:23:03.48
everything
starts being recorded,
00:23:03.51\00:23:04.85
camera starts
recording, they have a mike pack
00:23:04.88\00:23:07.45
in which they have to record
everything that's coming in.
00:23:07.48\00:23:11.22
So there are
rights and regulations,
00:23:11.25\00:23:13.72
and you can always
ask, you can always go,
00:23:13.76\00:23:16.96
especially as pastors,
00:23:16.99\00:23:18.83
you know, let's bring our
kids to the police departments
00:23:18.86\00:23:22.10
and create that
harmony in community,
00:23:22.13\00:23:25.53
work towards
building the harmony
00:23:25.57\00:23:27.47
between community
and law enforcement.
00:23:27.50\00:23:29.77
Will it be perfect?
00:23:29.80\00:23:31.14
No, but nothing is ever perfect.
00:23:31.17\00:23:33.41
But we have to take steps,
00:23:33.44\00:23:35.04
we're doing too
much sharing of posts,
00:23:35.08\00:23:37.65
too much
clicking, too much of this.
00:23:37.68\00:23:40.12
We have to start talking
00:23:40.15\00:23:41.48
because our kids
are watching us...
00:23:41.52\00:23:42.85
Yes, yes.
00:23:42.88\00:23:44.22
And how their
fathers deal with injustice.
00:23:44.25\00:23:46.65
Let me tell you one of
the another practical thing
00:23:46.69\00:23:48.86
we did at the church
that I was pastoring.
00:23:48.89\00:23:53.36
You know, before I pastored,
00:23:53.40\00:23:54.73
I worked in
mental health for years.
00:23:54.76\00:23:56.67
And once again,
00:23:56.70\00:23:58.03
I've learned from
mistakes not to assume anything.
00:23:58.07\00:24:02.94
We'll probably talk
about this another time.
00:24:02.97\00:24:04.77
When I was in mental health,
00:24:04.81\00:24:06.88
I met a young man
who was homosexual
00:24:06.91\00:24:09.41
and I assumed, you know,
00:24:09.44\00:24:13.08
that it was because he chose it,
00:24:13.11\00:24:14.85
all these things
were very rounded.
00:24:14.88\00:24:16.89
When he shared his...
00:24:16.92\00:24:18.25
And we sat down and
he shared his story,
00:24:18.29\00:24:20.09
he said, "You
know, Mr. White..."
00:24:20.12\00:24:22.26
At that time, I
was not a pastor yet.
00:24:22.29\00:24:24.59
"I was molested when
I was four years old,
00:24:24.63\00:24:28.36
you know, by my
father and my uncle."
00:24:28.40\00:24:32.13
And I sat down with another
guy who was homosexual too
00:24:32.17\00:24:35.27
and he shared his
story, and another,
00:24:35.30\00:24:37.24
and I listened to their stories.
00:24:37.27\00:24:39.11
And because of that experience,
00:24:39.14\00:24:41.04
working in five
years of mental health,
00:24:41.08\00:24:43.04
just sit down and
listen to people's stories
00:24:43.08\00:24:47.02
just like Christ did,
00:24:47.05\00:24:49.22
I took that into ministry.
00:24:49.25\00:24:51.52
And one of the
churches I started working in,
00:24:51.55\00:24:54.16
there was racism, but
the other kind of racism.
00:24:54.19\00:24:58.29
Inter-racism.
00:24:58.33\00:25:00.36
They're all black,
00:25:00.40\00:25:01.73
majority of
them, rather all black,
00:25:01.76\00:25:03.67
but there are three
major nationalities.
00:25:03.70\00:25:06.27
There's Africans,
there are West Indians,
00:25:06.30\00:25:08.84
and African-Americans,
00:25:08.87\00:25:10.57
and you would think,
00:25:10.61\00:25:12.11
"Oh, do you know
these people get along."
00:25:12.14\00:25:15.28
Deep down inside,
they didn't. Right.
00:25:15.31\00:25:17.48
So for Black
History Month, I said,
00:25:17.51\00:25:20.48
"You know, we wanted
you guys to share your story
00:25:20.52\00:25:23.55
to celebrate your
identity in Christ,
00:25:23.59\00:25:27.12
but sit down and
share your story."
00:25:27.16\00:25:28.49
We had a panel discussion,
00:25:28.52\00:25:29.86
and one of my kids
that he was at AYS,
00:25:29.89\00:25:31.89
I had all the youth leader too
00:25:31.93\00:25:33.36
'cause I wanted them
to sit down and hear this.
00:25:33.40\00:25:35.86
And we had three different...
00:25:35.90\00:25:38.10
I mean, not three denomination,
three different cultures,
00:25:38.13\00:25:41.37
all three of them sit
down, representative for me
00:25:41.40\00:25:44.31
and I want you guys
to share your story.
00:25:44.34\00:25:46.78
How have you dealt
00:25:46.81\00:25:48.14
with oppression,
racism, whatever?"
00:25:48.18\00:25:50.08
We were blown away.
00:25:50.11\00:25:51.45
Within our own
race. Within our way.
00:25:51.48\00:25:53.58
The people from Africa,
this lady was from South Africa
00:25:53.62\00:25:58.39
and she shared
about the apartheid.
00:25:58.42\00:26:00.89
This guy was from Guyana
00:26:00.92\00:26:02.39
and he shared about
racism in South America.
00:26:02.42\00:26:06.70
The other person
was from Africa-America
00:26:06.73\00:26:09.10
and she shared about
in the south and stuff.
00:26:09.13\00:26:11.90
And when they
all were sitting down
00:26:11.93\00:26:13.30
and listening to
each other's stories,
00:26:13.34\00:26:14.67
you can see and
the audience was like
00:26:14.70\00:26:16.04
"Wow. We all are hurt." Yeah.
00:26:16.07\00:26:20.41
"We all have
been damaged by this."
00:26:20.44\00:26:22.78
You know what they'd say?
00:26:22.81\00:26:24.15
We should not
focus our attention now
00:26:24.18\00:26:25.81
on throwing blows,
more blows at each other
00:26:25.85\00:26:28.08
but rather, try to
help heal each other.
00:26:28.12\00:26:30.72
Healing. Yeah.
00:26:30.75\00:26:32.09
And so sharing
stories, listening to people,
00:26:32.12\00:26:34.82
taking that time out to find...
00:26:34.86\00:26:36.29
Like I said, when I used
to go to the departments,
00:26:36.32\00:26:39.66
even if I go to a
department store now...
00:26:39.69\00:26:41.76
We're at Walmart and
went to the department,
00:26:41.80\00:26:44.03
this lady had a
chip on her shoulder,
00:26:44.07\00:26:45.67
Caucasian lady.
00:26:45.70\00:26:47.04
Right?
00:26:47.07\00:26:48.40
Lord was like, "Calm
down, listen to her story."
00:26:48.44\00:26:51.47
I said, "How are
you doing today?"
00:26:51.51\00:26:54.54
And do you know
what she said to me?
00:26:54.58\00:26:55.94
She said.
00:26:55.98\00:26:57.55
"I've been
having a terrible day."
00:26:57.58\00:27:00.05
So do not assume.
00:27:00.08\00:27:01.98
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely.
00:27:02.02\00:27:05.15
Amen. I guess so we...
00:27:05.19\00:27:07.22
This is such a big topic,
00:27:07.26\00:27:09.32
and we can discuss
this for days and hours.
00:27:09.36\00:27:12.59
You know, and there
is no clear cut answer
00:27:12.63\00:27:15.80
to these issues, but Jesus.
00:27:15.83\00:27:17.73
Exactly.
00:27:17.77\00:27:19.10
You know, there's
something I want to convey
00:27:19.13\00:27:20.47
to the fathers out there
is your kids are watching you.
00:27:20.50\00:27:24.64
They're watching how
you deal with the issues,
00:27:24.67\00:27:27.31
the injustices,
00:27:27.34\00:27:28.84
they're watching you
if you lose your temper
00:27:28.88\00:27:31.55
or if you keep your temper.
00:27:31.58\00:27:33.11
They're watching you to
see if you follow Christ
00:27:33.15\00:27:36.25
or your own personal feelings.
00:27:36.28\00:27:38.75
And not to say
that you're a bad parent
00:27:38.79\00:27:41.06
or a bad father if
you make a mistake,
00:27:41.09\00:27:43.43
it's just to say
wouldn't that be a reason
00:27:43.46\00:27:45.89
to cling on to
Christ that much more?
00:27:45.93\00:27:48.56
It sounds cliche, but
like I always tell people,
00:27:48.60\00:27:50.87
I don't follow
Jesus for the sake of it,
00:27:50.90\00:27:53.23
I follow Jesus to
keep me from being angry
00:27:53.27\00:27:56.10
and hurting anybody
else at these injustices
00:27:56.14\00:27:59.24
and being an example to my kids.
00:27:59.27\00:28:01.81
If for anything
else, do it for your kids.
00:28:01.84\00:28:04.28
Racism will not end
until Christ comes back.
00:28:04.31\00:28:07.02
Until then, be a
good father and keep safe.
00:28:07.05\00:28:11.32
Thank you for watching.
00:28:11.35\00:28:12.69